The World without the War
by S-Michael
Summary: What would the world of Avatar be like if it wasn't for the war? It turns out it's no utopia. Firelord Iroh sends Azula to warn the Water Tribes not to pull anything, while in the Earth Kingdom rebels and bandits gather under the banner of Toph Bei-Fong.
1. Prologue: Our Stage is Set

**AN:** I wanted to explore what the world would have been like before the war, but really, why have an _Avatar_ fanfic without any of _Avatar_'s characters in it? So I decided to look at a world where everyone exists (or existed), but the war never happened.

BTW, this sort of thing is the _proper_ meaning of AU; those stories where the cast is in a modern high school or whatever are properly called AR (alternate _reality_). Just so you know.

The World without the War

S-Michael

Prologue:

In Which Our Stage is Set

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_142 years before present_

"The Avatar is here to see you, sire," the soldier said.

Firelord Sozin gestured for him to be let in, and stroked his graying beard as Roku entered. "Ah, Roku, long time no see. To what do I owe the pleasure of your company?"

"The 'colony' you established in the Earth Kingdom. What are they calling it? The State of Sunshine? Cute."

The Firelord shrugged. "If the Earth King's paying so little attention to his vassals that he lets them fight amongst themselves, I am of course going to take whatever actions I deem necessary to protect the Fire Nation's trade and other interests in those parts of the Earth Kingdom where it has interests."

"And of course this has nothing at all to do with your dreams of global domination," the Avatar said sarcastically.

"So, what are you going to do? Tell me the four lands are meant to be separate, and trash my throne room to make your point?"

"That _was_ my first instinct, but cooler heads in the form of my wife prevailed, so I'm going to try to make you see reason," Roku said.

"_I'm_ the one who's not seeing reason? That's rich," Sozin retorted. "You've become a slave to 'the balance' at the expense of common sense! Look at the way the rest of the world lives! The Air Nomads are too busy contemplating their navels to interact in the real world, the Earth Kingdom is a loose affiliation of vassal states kept from shattering only by the fact that the territory ruled directly by Ba Sing Se is a hundred times as massive as that of even its largest vassals, such as Omashu, and has a proportionally larger population and military, and the Water Tribes are twin packs of misogynistic morons who need to be taught a serious lesson by _some_body!"

"I know. And I don't like much of that any more than you do," Roku said.

"Then…why won't you help me?"

"Because people have the right to self-determination, even if it means that they make stupid mistakes and cause themselves a lot of grief. The world is not and is never going to be perfect." Roku half-smirked: "Not even the Fire Nation." Then he was serious again. "Let's say you were to invade, oh, the Northern Water Tribe, as everyone in the world seems to agree with the summation that Water Tribesmen are complete assholes. You send your armies in and force them to stop treating their women like property, all well and good. What does it prove? It doesn't prove that you're right any more than the fact that Chin the Conquerer managed to conquer most of the Earth Kingdom proved that _he_ was right. All it proves is that when the Fire Nation can't get the rest of the world to do what it wants them to do, it resorts to military action.…"

The discussion went on for many hours, and when Roku left, the sun was low in the sky, but he wasn't sure he had gotten through to his old friend.

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_30 years later_

Roku coughed, his vision blurring. He was dying here on this volcano. "Go. Save yourself!"

"Not a chance," Sozin said. They were fighting a mountain. And losing, of course; it was a mountain; it would win in the end. But the longer they fought it off, the longer the inhabitants of the island would have to flee.

Many times, over these last three decades, Roku wondered at Sozin's sincerity at having agreed to not invade the Earth Kingdom. Wondering if he was just waiting for Roku to die so he could make his move. _I guess I'm finding out; too bad neither of us will survive the experience._

That night, the Avatar spirit left Roku's body and searched for a new host. It had a very specific criteria; airbender (this time), male (this time), and a fetus of a certain age. To young, and there would be nothing there for a soul to hold onto; too old, and the native gooey mass of spirit energy would have already congealed into one. One month later, a baby was born. A baby who would later be given to the care of the monks of the Southern Air Temple. A baby named Aang.

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_12 years later_

Firelord Azulon felt the power of Taru's comet singing through his veins, a joyous choir of angelic spirits who want to burn, burn, _burn!_ Too bad, almost, that there was no one to fight. When Azulon succeeded his father, he had learned that Sozin had predicted when the comet would show up—right down to day and time—but the information had been classified, just in case. About a year ago, realizing that it wasn't going to matter, Azulon declassified it. After all, his father should get the credit for this. Predicting the comet was a big deal amongst firebenders. In fact, the way Taru had gotten the comet renamed in his honor in the first place was by predicting it, but his formulas had been long since lost. But, apparently, Sozin had reinvented them. _That means it's "Sozin's Comet," now, I guess._

Thousands of miles away, at the Southern Air Temple, a young boy also felt the pull of the comet, and was confused by it. After all, he was an _air_bender, not a firebender. He flew laps around the Temple, trying to burn off this strange excess energy he felt, while Monk Gyatso watched, frowning slightly. He had no idea what effect the comet would have on a twelve-year-old boy who hadn't been told yet that he was the Avatar.

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_84 years later_

Avatar Aang lay dying, surrounded by friends and family. There were tricks that could extend an Avatar's life, but Aang had chosen to forgo them. After all, the whole point of the Avatar cycle, as opposed to having the Avatar be some immortal spirit on a mountain somewhere, was so that the Avatar could live as a human, with all the loving, hating, and mistake-making that implied. And all the dying that implied, as well.

"I will miss you, old friend," Firelord Iroh said, gently patting the Avatar's hand.

Aang grinned lopsidedly. "It's not like I haven't done all this before. Or that I won't be back."

"Well, hurry back," Iroh said. "I expect to see a young waterbender around the royal palace sixteen years from now."

"And to be hitting on her two years after that, no doubt." Aang chuckled, coughed, and closed his eyes. A few seconds later, he stopped breathing.

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_6 years later_

"You already gave me one of these manuscripts one of the times you were in here before," Wan Shi Tong said.

"Oh, did I?" Zhou asked. "Damn! Sorry; it's hard to keep track."

"Since you have such an obvious thirst for knowledge, I suppose I can let it slide," the giant owl spirit said. "It's more the thought that counts, anyway."

"That is deeply appreciated," Zhou said, and it was; he was running out of things to give Wan Shi Tong. He made his way deep into the library. He'd learned many things over the past few months (like the identity of the moon spirit, which was interesting, yet useless; after all, he wasn't at war with the Water Tribes last time he checked), but sensed that something that would truly help him was in here somewhere. It was just a matter of finding it.

Zhou unpacked his supplies at his "base camp." He didn't intend to leave the Library any more frequently than he had to, as every time he did, it cost him another book or parchment or _something_. He continued searching through the archives where he'd left off when he went to go to the nearest town and get another week's worth of food and water. Late the next day, he found something of immense promise. Ideas immediately began to flow through his head. But how would he arrange things exactly right, he wondered? He remembered something he'd read earlier, and went back to the proper scroll, rereading it with new eyes.

_Yes; this will do quite nicely. A bit byzantine, perhaps, but no plan is perfect._

Of course, he'd have to wait for Sozin's Comet, but hey, that was only a decade away…


	2. Ch 1: Azula Tries to Be Polite

The World without the War

S-Michael

Chapter 1:

In Which Azula Tries to Be Polite, and Kicks Water Tribe Butt

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"Sokka, Katara, we have a very important guest for dinner," Hakoda said. "This is Princess Azula of the Fire Nation."

"Charmed," Sokka said, taking her hand and kissing it.

"Uh…"

"It's a Water Tribe custom," Hakoda whispered out of the side of his mouth. "Just roll with it."

"Oh, okay," Azula said, visibly relieved. "Likewise," and she took Sokka's hand and kissed it in return.

"It's…only supposed to be the guy who kisses the girl's hand, actually," Hakoda said.

"Well, _that's_ dumb," Azula said, then bit her tongue. She was here representing the Fire Nation; it would not do to start an incident, even with such a no-account little settlement as this.

Instead of taking it as an insult, however, Hakoda grinned. "Maybe, but us Water Tribesmen are a peculiar lot. At least, that's what they always say. Shall we proceed?"

"Of course," Azula said.

"I'm afraid my wife couldn't make it," Hakoda said apologetically as they sat at the table (himself at the head, Azula on his left, and his children across from her with Sokka nearer his father). The meal was already prepared, four bowls of…something. Azula began to ask, then decided that she didn't want to know. _Freaking Water-people and their idiotic cuisine._

"I'm sorry to hear that, Chief Hakoda," Azula said, being polite.

"Please, call me Hakoda." He grinned, "It seems a bit pretentious to put on titles when you lead one small village at the south pole."

"Very well, Hakoda."

"It's a pleasure to have you with us, Princess," Sokka said.

Katara chuckled. "Look who's trying to be smooth."

"Please, call me Azula," Azula said. "It's not that I'm averse to putting on airs—it's just kind of tedious."

"So, it's not every day we get a princess of the Fire Nation at the South Pole. It makes one curious," Hakoda fished tactfully.

"Yes, well. As you know, it's been sixteen years since the last Avatar passed away, meaning that the next one is just about due to make her appearance. We of course don't know who that Avatar is in the Fire Nation, but we do know, as does everyone, that the Avatar will be, one, a waterbender, and two, female." The Avatar Cycle switched from going boy-girl-boy-girl to girl-boy-girl-boy et vice versa every time the Avatar cycled through; that way, people wouldn't get weird sexual stereotypes in their heads about the bending styles.

"And we don't exactly have the greatest tract record in the world where that's concerned, do we?" Hakoda filled in the blank.

"The last female waterbender Avatar appeared at the north pole," Azula said. "Even knowing that she was, well, _the Avatar_, they refused to teach her martial waterbending," Azula said. "That incident solidified the Water Tribes' reputation of, not to put too fine a point on it, being dick-filled bags of dick with dick-sauce."

"Well, that definitely wasn't too fine a point," Hakoda admitted bemusedly.

Azula tried to mitigate the blow: "The reason I came south first was that you're…well…"

"Less dickish?" Katara supplied.

"Yeah."

"I can't help but to think that the Firelord was making a subtler but similar point by sending his niece, who happens to be a 'bending prodigy as well as female," Hakoda hypothesized.

"Uncle Iroh does have a shifty mind," Azula admitted this and nothing more, smirking a bit shiftily herself.

"Not to put too fine a point on it, but I can't help but to wonder just what you're supposed to accomplish," Katara said. "It's not as if you have any authority at the poles, after all."

"It's more about sending a message than anything else: The rest of the world is watching."

"I see," Hakoda said. "Well, _if_ the Avatar were here, it would be improper to tell you about it before we told her, so all I can tell you is that she hasn't turned sixteen yet."

"I see."

"We're _Southern_ Water Tribe, anyway," Katara said with just the slightest whiff of indignation. "_We_ don't tell people who can bend the elemental forces of the universe to their will that they can't fight just because they have a uterus." Though, admittedly, if you _couldn't_ bend said elemental forces of the universe to your will, well, that was a different story altogether.

Azula chuckled. "Quite."

Hakoda said: "It seems to me that since your mission is basically to 'show the flag', as it were, if I were to send someone with you, it would reinforce the notion that the _world_ is watching, rather than that…"

"…that the Fire Nation is sticking its nose where it doesn't belong? Again? On account of our thinking we're so special and awesome?" Azula supplied.

"I'd have put it a bit more tactfully," Hakoda said.

"Of course you would've," Azula smiled.

"You forgot the part where everyone else should admit to your inherent superiority on account of your being special and awesome," Sokka said.

"Well, naturally; it goes without saying."

"My _point_ is, maybe when you head on north, you should take Sokka and Katara with you," Hakoda said.

"I…will mull it over," Azula tactfully didn't promise anything.

"So, Azula, you're a prodigious firebender?" Katara asked.

"That I am," Azula confirmed, pride shading her voice.

"Not to brag, but I'm something of a waterbending prodigy myself," Katara said. "Hama says I've surpassed every other waterbender in the South already. So it would be interesting to test myself against another sort of bender."

Azula grinned, and it was rather more wolfish than her previous, polite smiles. "Are you challenging me to a fight?"

"Not for honor or anything like that, just for fun…but yeah," Katara said. "Think you're up for it, Princess?"

"Oh, it's on," Azula promised, grinning wolfishly.

"But not at the dinner table, I trust, ladies?" Hakoda stated.

"No, Dad," Katara promised. They went back to their meal.

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"Alright, I want a good, clean fight, ladies," Sokka said. "No hair-pulling, eye-scratching—"

"Sokka, shut up," Katara said. She waved her arm, and the snow beneath his feet bucked, dumping him on his ass.

"Well, thank the spirits _that's_ taken care of," Azula said, rolling her eyes dramatically. Katara giggled. That's when, without warning, Azula threw a fireball at Katara, who blocked it with a wall of ice. Katara attacked with a water whip, and Azula countered with a fire whip. Then Azula shot the water whip with lightning. Katara let it go a mere instant before she would have been electrocuted, and managed to throw up an ice shield before getting hit with another blue fireball.

_What the hell? She's really trying to _kill_ me!_ Katara melted a circle outline in the ice around Azula, and then flipped the now-free floating chunk of ice she was standing on so she fell into the drink. "Ha! Try to firebend down there!" A firebolt shot through the ice near her feet. Katara jumped to avoid being hit. _Holy shit! She can firebend _underwater! Several more bolts came at Katara, who had to dance to avoid them, and then Azula shot out of the ice herself, riding a pillar of blue flame like a really pissed off genie.

She grabbed Katara by the wrist, forced her to the ground, and held a flame barely far enough from her throat to not burn. "I win," Azula said.

"I'll say," Katara agreed, rather coolly, considering that she was afraid to even swallow lest she inadvertently burn herself. As it was, her neck was feeling crisp. Azula got off her, and Katara brushed herself off as she stood. "You know, it looked like you were really trying to kill me there."

"You said you were a prodigy; I took your word for it," Azula said.

"Okay," _I guess._ Katara tried shaking off the feeling that a monster lurked under Azula's façade. "That whole firebending-underwater was a neat trick. How'd you do it?"

"It's not a trick; my fire just burns that hotly," Azula answered.

"Huh." _Scary._

"That was awesome," Sokka said. Then, because he never knew when to shut up, he added: "I'd hate to see what the men in your family can do."

"Excuse me?" Azula asked dangerously.

"Hey, _I_ certainly couldn't take you, what with the whole shooting lightning from your fingertips and all, but that doesn't change the fact that, all other things being even, men are just better at certain things—fighting, hunting—and women are better at certain other things—sowing, cooking."

"I'll fight you without using firebending," Azula said.

"Hey, now, that would hardly be fair," Sokka demurred.

"You're right, it wouldn't." She placed her left arm behind her back. "I'll fight you one handed. No, wait," instead, she placed her right arm behind her back, "I'll fight you _left_-handed. There, that ought to give you something approaching a chance of beating me."

"That's not what I meant. I can't fight a girl; it just wouldn't be right," Sokka said.

"Do it or I'll lose all respect for you and punch you in the face," Azula said.

"I don't know—"

With liquid-quick speed, Azula stepped into him, put her foot behind his, and pushed him over it, causing him to fall on his butt. And then she kicked him in the stomach. "Best two out of three?"

"Oh, it's _on!_" Sokka hissed. "Just give me a second to get back up first."

"Good. Also, the loser has to declare themselves to be a pretty princess," Azula stipulated as he got to his feet.

"But…you _are_ a pretty princess," Sokka said. Then he realized that he'd just called Azula pretty to her face, and grimaced to himself.

"What, you're suddenly not so sure you can win?" Azula teased.

"Oh, it's on, princess," Sokka said. He jumped at her. Azula dodged, tripped him again, and rested her heel on the back of his neck.

"Best three out of five?"

Sokka got to his feet. "Just…stop jumping around like that!"

"Alright." This time, when Sokka attacked, she grabbed his arm and swung him around, twisting it behind his back while she forced him to the ground. "Best four out of seven?"

"No, I'm beginning to get the idea that the universe is trying to tell me something," Sokka said.

"Oh, so you _are_ smarter than you look, after all! Not that that's hard. But isn't there something that you're supposed to say?"

"I never actually agreed to that."

"Katara?" Azula prompted.

"You _did_ say 'it's on' _after_ Azula stipulated that the loser must declare themselves to be 'a pretty princess,'" Katara said.

"Traitor," Sokka accused. "Fine:" he mumbled: "I'm a pretty princess."

"What was that, Sokka? I couldn't hear you?" Azula crowed.

"I'm a pretty princess, okay?" Sokka said.

"Good to know," Azula said, getting off him. She studied him as he got up. He was embarrassed, humiliated…but, interestingly, not resentful, Azula didn't think. He may have been an idiot, but when presented with evidence that his beliefs were wrong, no matter how deeply entrenched those beliefs were, he changed his tune immediately…which, come to think of it, made him the exact opposite of an idiot. _I think I'll take these two with me, after all._

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The sound of Katara and Azula dueling came from the bow of the ship. At the stern, Sokka was playing cards with Commander Jee and two crew members named Doh and Ju. "Must they do that on the ship?" Sokka asked. "I mean, I can imagine the ship sinking because my sister got carried away and raised a tsunami. Why don't we land on that island over there?" he nodded at an island in the distance. "That way, the girls can get it all out of their system once and for all."

"_That_ island?" Commander Jee asked. "You don't want to do that. That's Kyoshi Island. They have a bad habit of tying outsiders to poles."

"Something the mighty Fire Navy can't deal with? I'm shocked—_shocked,_ I tell you—to hear that," Sokka said.

"You're getting the stereotype wrong. Fire Nation folks don't think we're stronger than everyone else—we think we're _better_," Jee lectured with an air of superiority as obviously fake as Sokka's shock.

"One would think the two would go hand-in-hand."

"That's because you're clearly an uncouth barbarian water peasant who thinks the only way to solve problems is with a sword," Jee teased.

"Ah, right, how careless of me," Sokka said.

"It fills my heart with joy that I've been able to fill that empty foreign head of yours with some of my superior Fire Nation knowledge." A giant column of water came out of the ocean, but what Katara did with it was blocked from view by the wheelhouse. "That must be an epic battle up there," Jee said.

Sokka shrugged. "If you want to check it out, be my guest."

"On second thought, I'm not that curious. I'd sooner face down Toph Bei-Fong than Princess Azula."

"Wise choice. Who's Toph Bei-Fong?"

"Oh, it's just an expression I picked up last time I was in the Earth Kingdom," Jee waved it away.

"Yes, but I don't get it," Sokka prompted.

"Toph Bei-Fong is the queen of bandits and rebels, and scourge of the Earth Kingdom," Jee said. "The story goes that the Bei-Fong family was a rich one. I think they had their own barony—"

"County," Ju corrected.

"Duchy," Doh corrected.

"Ah, what do you guys know? It's not like these sort of stories don't get exaggerated beyond all recognition in the telling, anyway. Anyway, _whatever_ sort of nobility the Bei-Fongs were, they had enemies, and their enemies had friends in Ba Sing Se. In the Dai Li, to be less vague about it," Jee said. "Anyway, this enemy convinced Long Feng to declare the Bei-Fong family traitor so that he or she could buy up their property, or something. No two sources seem to agree on the nature of the feud.

"Anyway, the Bei-Fongs were executed, but they missed one. A little blind girl named Toph, whom her parents had kept sequestered in their house's grounds because they thought she was fragile. After her family was destroyed, Toph Bei-Fong was raised by badger-moles, became the greatest earthbender to have ever lived, and is now fighting to destroy the Dai Li, Long Feng, and Ba Sing Se."

"I wonder what the Avatar would have to say about that?" Sokka thought aloud.

"They say that, sixteen years ago, Avatar Aang went into a spirit trance and looked into the future," Ju said. "There he saw Toph Bei-Fong staring back at him, and died of fright."

Sokka laughed. "That was _so_ funny!"

"Oh, there's a million of those 'Toph Bei-Fong Facts,'" Jee said. He counted on his fingers: "'The Great Divide was not created by Earth Spirits; it was created by Toph Bei-Fong so that canyon crawlers could have some place to live.' 'Toph Bei-Fong stole Koh's face.' 'There is no celestial order of the cosmos; there are only spirits whom Toph Bei-Fong allows to live.' 'Experts believe that the only force in the universe capable of stopping Toph Bei-Fong…is _another_ Toph Bei-Fong.' 'The reason "Toph Bei-Fong Facts" are proscribed—' which, they are, in the Earth Kingdom '—is that the Dai Li are afraid of the truth.'"

Sokka was laughing so hard he was crying. "Stop! You're killing me! Where did you get these?"

"Leaflets and graffiti, mostly," Jee said. "I'm sure there's still a couple of those leaflets around here somewhere."

Doh pulled a leaflet out of his tunic. "Here."

"Seriously?" the other sailor asked.

"What? They're funny."

Sokka read the first one, and laughed: "'Toph Bei-Fong doesn't earthbend; the earth does what she wants because it knows better than to piss her off.'" He burst out laughing again. "Oh, here's another one! 'Toph Bei-Fong once punched a saber-toothed moose-lion in the face; by the time it hit the ground, it had split into a moose, a lion, and other such imaginary animals.'" Laugh. "Or, 'The reason flying bison fly is to get away from Toph Bei-Fong.'"

"Yes, I know; we gave you that leaflet, remember?" Jee said.

"Oh, right."

Then they heard the scream.

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**AN:** Please R&R. Help me dream up some more Toph Facts, if nothing else, because I intend to burn through a lot of them in this story and only have, like seven left (three of which are reappropriated Chuck Norris Facts, like the one above about how the only thing that can stop Toph is another Toph).


	3. Ch 2: Sokka is NOT Azula's Boyfriend

**AN:** The political setup I've created for the Earth Kingdom is based on China's Shang Dynasty.

The internal organization of the Dai Li, when I eventually go into it, will be based on StateSec from the Honor Harrington universe, which itself is based on exactly what you'd expect something with those initials to be based on. And those of you who are familiar with "the Honorverse" will have little trouble figuring out who "Kasha" is an expy of, and hence not only _that_ he'll reappear in later chapters, but generally what roll he'll play in them.

The World without the War

S-Michael

Chapter 2:

In Which People are Met and Sokka is Most Emphatically not Azula's Boyfriend

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Azula managed to burn her way through the column of water Katara sent at her, but she didn't burn all of it. Katara wrapped her in an ice-cocoon, which she immediately began burning her way out of. _There is no stopping her!_ Katara panicked, and squeezed what ice was left, which only covered the lower extremities of Azula's left limbs. There was a sickening audible snap of bones breaking, and Azula screamed and fell to the ground.

"Oh, spirits, I'm sorry," Katara said, running to her. Azula was staring at her left hand like it had betrayed her. "I guess I got a little carried away."

Azula was muttering something through gritted teeth. When Katara got close enough to heal her, she heard it more-or-less clearly: "Don't kill Katara. Don't kill Katara. Don't kill Katara…" Something about the mantra sent chills down Katara's back. Not the words, for that sort of thing was to be expected when someone has just humiliated and/or seriously injured one, and if people meant it every time they say they were going to kill someone—or even one tenth of every time—the world would long since have been depopulated. What chilled Katara's spine was that she heard—or thought she heard, at any rate—a sense of manic earnestness in the words, like Azula was clamping down hard on her first instinct and just barely managing to contain it.

_Surely, my imagination._ And yet…

Sokka arrived with a group of sailors. "Everything alright? We heard a scream."

"Yeah, I just got a little carried away," Katara said. To Azula: "I'm not sure keeping this up is a good idea. Someone could get seriously hurt. Or worse."

Azula's smile was strained. "Don't tell me you want to quit sparring just because you finally won one?"

"Azula, I'm serious. I mean, look at your arm and leg."

"Good thing you can heal, then."

"My healing talent isn't omnipotent, Azula."

"I suppose we could…take a breather. And proceed more restrainedly."

Jee and the sailors visibly relaxed.

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Kasha looked at himself in the mirror, admiring the sight of himself in his Dai Li uniform. He was new to the Dai Li, new enough to squeak (proverbially speaking), and still awed by the fact that he was, in fact, Dai Li. He was also young. He'd been an earthbending prodigy, which had allowed him to enter the Dai Li training course a few years early. At sixteen, he was one of the youngest Dai Li "probies" in history. With a sigh, he took the uniform off and put it away. He wasn't actually on duty, yet; when he'd chosen which branch of the service to be assigned to, he'd chosen the outer fifes, so that he'd be in a better place to fight foreign espionage, but the outer fifes were a long, _long_ way away. The caravan Kasha had been traveling with had stopped in Omashu, and the one to Saibei didn't leave until tomorrow at noon, so he had a lot of free time on his hands at the moment.

In plain clothes, he left the Inn, and went to see the sights. Almost immediately, he saw a sign plastered near the enterance of an alley:

_CITIZENS OF OMASHU_

_DO NOT walk down this alley. _

_Down this alley is wicked, solicitous graffiti which the_

_Dai Li has deemed offensive in the name of the Earth King._

_Surly, decent citizens such as yourselves would never_

_do anything to offend Long Feng, would you?_

_-King Bumi_

Kasha snorted. _What a _dick! Of course a sign like this was only going to draw crowds to see said offensive graffiti. And, of course, when the local Dai Li station commander confronted the "king" about this, he'd stare back with wide eye innocence, claiming he had no idea, and generally acting like butter wouldn't melt in his mouth. Kasha had heard that some of the enfeoffed princes were offering passive-aggressive resistance to the Dai Li, but this guy appeared to actually be _mocking_ them!

_Eventually, "King" Bumi will step a toe just too far out of line, and then the local station commander will disappear him and replace him with a more suitable "king,"_ Kasha reassured himself. He decided to see what was down the alley. _And so I fall into Bumi's trap._ It didn't take him long to find the graffiti:

_TOPH BEI-FONG_

_100 true facts about the greatest human being to have ever lived_

_1) In all of recorded history, only 3 people have ever beaten the Avatar in a fair fight. Toph Bei-Fong did so with both arms tied behind her back. While in a full-body cast._

_2) Water Tribesmen stay at the poles because they are afraid of Toph Bei Fong._

_3) Toph Bei-Fong is not blind; the reason she doesn't look at you is because her gaze can suck out your soul._

_4) Every time you masturbate, Toph Bei-Fong kills a Dai Li operative. Not because you masturbated; that's just how often Toph Bei-Fong kills Dai Li._

And it went on and on like that, getting ever more ridiculous. Also, there were only twenty-seven of them not a hundred. For a second, Kasha wondered why such childish nonsense was proscribed in the first place, given that in this case the very proscribed-ness could only increase the popularity of "Toph Bei-Fong Facts." Then he shook his head and walked away. Long Feng knew what he was doing.

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"Should you really be putting that much weight on your leg?"

Azula startled at the voice, and instead of shooting lightning, a fireball blew up in her face. "Damn it, Sokka, don't startle me like that! One of us could have been hurt."

"Hey, I'm just saying that Katara said you should take it easy."

"I _am;_ this is me taking it easy," and with that, Azula grabbed her crutch and made her way away.

"Whoa, she's kind of intense," Sokka muttered, walking in the other direction.

"Hey, there."

Sokka startled at the voice and turned. There was a girl on the ship. Another girl, other than his sister and Azula. A girl he'd never seen before. Which, considering the fact that they hadn't made landfall in a couple weeks, begged the question—

"Ty Lee! How did you get here?" Azula demanded.

"Azula!" the girl shouted, hugging her. "I flew."

"Wow, I've never seen an airbender before," Sokka said. "Where's your glider?"

"She's not an airbender," Azula said. To Ty Lee: "So how'd you manage that?"

"With my flying bison, Fluffy." Ty Lee blew on a bison whistle. "Come here, Fluffy!" A giant mattress monster landed on the deck of the ship.

"Well, he _is_ fluffy," Sokka admitted dryly.

"So…" Ty Lee gestured at Sokka with her head, "is he your boyfriend?"

"What? NO! No, no, no! Just…no," Azula said, so quickly she almost stumbled over the words.

"Oh, good!" Ty Lee said cheerfully. She sidled up next to Sokka and put her arm around his shoulder. "So, what are you doing, cutie?"

"I…uh…" Sokka composed himself. "Oh, nothing," he said, trying to be suave. "Hanging out on the ship. Doing ship stuff."

"So, Ty Lee, which one of your three hundred boyfriends gave you the flying bison?" Azula asked.

"Azula! You just said he _wasn't_ your boyfriend!"

"He's not!" Azula sputtered.

"Then why would you cramp my style like that?"

"I'm going to go find my sister and, um…_not_ be fought over like a piece of meat. Have fun, ladies!" Sokka said.

"That's NOT what's happening here!" Azula snapped at his retreating back.

"Ah, well; easy come, easy go," Ty Lee said philosophically.

"So, why _are_ you here?"

"Since I have a flying bison now, the Firelord sent me to deliver a message to his old friend King Bumi, who then sent me to find you."

"And you don't think acting as a messenger-girl is a little demeaning for a lady of your birth?" Azula asked. Ty Lee blinked. "Never mind. So, tell me what's been going on back home…."

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_See, this is exactly the sort of problem the Avatar could be solving for us, if we knew where she was,_ Iroh thought. "So you're telling me that these villagers are being attacked by…ghosts?" the Firelord asked.

"Indeed, sire," Commander Zhou said. "I've asked local spiritualists to try and find a reason for it, but they can find none. The villagers haven't brought this on themselves by abusing the local wildlife or sacred shrines or anything of the nature. You are of course welcome to have your own experts take a look, my liege, but I am certain of this."

"Yes, I shall have to, to be thorough, but for now let's assume your men and women didn't screw up by the numbers. You've been the man on the spot these last couple weeks, Commander; I'd like to hear what you think," Iroh said.

"Me?" Zhou seemed flustered by the fact that the _Firelord_ was asking a mere commander such as himself for advice…"seemed to be" being the key phrase in that sentence. Zhou thought furiously, but not quite about what the Firelord might think he was thinking about: _How much should I say? I don't want to seem like I have a preternatural intuition about this, but on the other hand, I also don't want to look like an idiot._ "Well, if it's not natural, maybe it's _un_natural. I sound like an idiot—"

"Actually, Commander, I was thinking precisely the same thing," Iroh said. "I'm thinking that I ought to have the library scoured for references to ancient sealed evils or cursed objects in that area of the Fire Nation."

"Sire, if it's an object, perhaps it's mobile."

"Excellent thinking, commander." The Firelord chuckled, "Of course, the palace's librarians are not going to thank you for that little insight."

Zhou chuckled politely. This was going quite splendidly. The librarians would find the forged documents, and then, in attempting to banish the ghosts, they would end up furthering Zhou's plans. _Of course, if the Avatar returns before Sozin's Comet, I'm screwed, and even if everything has gone perfectly by the time it has come and gone, that will still have been the _easy_ part…_

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"We simply don't have the time to stop in Omashu and visit King Bumi," Azula said. "It's going to take us months to get to the North Pole as it is."

"Not if we take Fluffy," Ty Lee said. "We could get to Omashu in a couple weeks, and to the Northern Water Tribe a couple weeks after that." It was a perfectly logical suggestion, one that would cut their travel time considerably. But, for some reason, something inside Azula riled against it. "What's the matter—don't want me in such close proximity to Sokka for such an extended period of time?"

"_No!_" Azula denied.

"No, you don't? You're admitting it?"

"You know what I meant, Ty Lee!"

"If he's yours, just say so. I don't want to poach on your territory."

"Just…drop it, okay? I'm getting a migraine."

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"Hey…uh…Azula?" Sokka said awkwardly.

Azula sighed through her nose. "Look, I don't know how Ty Lee got it into that sunshine-filled head of hers that I like you, but it's not true, okay?"

"Oh. I mean, right, of course. Because, you know, that would be crazy, right? I mean, what do we have in common? You're the warrior princess who shoots lightning from her fingertips, and I'm the guy who makes cute witticisms. I'd embarrass you at parties, and you'd melt my house to the ground. Clearly, it would never work."

"Clearly," Azula agreed. Both were too caught up in their own assertions to notice the fakery of the other's cheerfulness. "So, what did you want to talk about?"

"Oh, not much. Just wanted to know if there was anything to do in Omashu. Stuff like that," Sokka said. _Specifically, anything _you'd_ like to do, as in, on a date…but, hey, no big. After all, what's a little rejection between friends? Heh-heh._

"There are a few things. I suppose I could show you around, when we get there," Azula promised.

"Yeah, that sounds great." _Just great. What the hell were you thinking, Sokka?_ "Anyway, I'd better go get my stuff and get aboard Fluffy." _Damn it, that's what I get for paying attention to the things that come out of Ty Lee's mouth. That girl clearly lives in a world made of rainbows and lollipops and unicorns and glitter. Flying in here on her giant pillow monster like some sort of—of—of…pillow monster rider, yeah! What an idiot._ He continued in his dark thoughts until he had his bag and came face-to face with Fluffy. Fluffy yawned, showing off a mouth bigger across than Sokka was tall. "Um…is that thing tame?"

"Sure is!" Ty Lee said. "Aren't you, Fluffy-wuffy-wuffilkins? Yes you are; yes _you_ are." She cuddled the wind bison's cheek.

"Wonderful," Sokka said. He got in and claimed a spot. Azula entered a few minutes later, and sat at the far side of the saddle as Sokka. Neither of them spoke.

Katara showed up last, and the flying bison took off. She looked at her brother, and then at Azula, and then at Ty Lee. "What's wrong with them?"

Ty Lee shrugged. "Lovers' spat?"

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There were things about the Earth Kingdom that most people, both inside and outside of it, did not realize. The Earth Kingdom was…big. Really, really big. The maps didn't really do it justice. And fractious. Officially, the Earth Kingdom hadn't been to war in four hundred years, since the days of Chin the Conquerer, but what that _really_ meant was that _Ba Sing Se_ had not been to war. The Central Nation of Ba Sing Se was large enough to keep the rest of the Earth Kingdom in line, and central enough where no one _else_ could get at it easily. It demanded tribute from its vassal states, just enough to prove who was in charge, and never relied on said tribute for its own survival. The system was ingenious; in the seven hundred years since it had been established, Ba Sing Se had only been to war once, with the aforementioned Chin the Conquerer.

The true nature of the Earth Kingdom had other consequences, however. It is a given fact of human nature that wherever you have two populations living in close proximity to one another, they _will_ intermarry, unless you take truly draconian measures to prevent "miscegenation" (which never worked as well as proponents of such measures liked to kid themselves, anyway)—and there were vassal states of the Earth Kingdom in regular contact with _every other kind of 'bender on the planet_.

If you were plunged into Sunshine without a map, you'd think you were in the Fire Nation; a surprising number of the people in the Kingdom of High Ridge were airbenders; the Princedom of Saibei covered a lot of cold, inhospitable territory that was absolutely no use to anybody…except Northern Water Tribe traders, hunters with a taste for caribou, and runaway brides. All these various fifes were tiny in the great bulk of the Earth Kingdom, true, but that did not change the fact that, if you knew where to look, you could find 'benders of all four elements who considered themselves to be part of the Earth Kingdom. It was a fact that very few people have tried to utilize to its full potential.

Toph Bei-Fong was very few people. Just one person, in fact.

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Toph hated flying. She couldn't see, she wasn't in control of where she was going, and she had to entrust her life to someone else's care; this last bit was what she hated most of all. Sometimes there was the silver lining of getting to hold on to a real hunk for dear life, but, alas, this time the airbender who was chauffeuring Toph around was female. It sucked, but in order for Toph to be everywhere she needed to be, she needed to travel like the wind—literally. They landed, and Toph was ever so relieved to be back on solid ground again. Home base.

"Hey, Toph," Teo greeted her.

"Hey, Wheels," Toph did likewise. "Has your dad invented anything new since I was away?"

"Actually, he's working on improving the icebox." The icebox had been the Mechanist's idea, and was genius in its simplicity of concept. Basically, you had an food container, ran pipes of water through it, and had a waterbender freeze the water. It kept food fresh for weeks, which was how Toph's base camp could survive so far out in the middle of the desert.

_It's simple, so of course Mac wants to complicate it,_ Toph thought wryly (such was her penchant for nickname that she gave a nickname to a man whose name was already a nickname). "Oh?"

Teo handed her an object that looked like a small pipe was trying to eat a big pipe. "Basically, you build it so that the big pipe is in the food compartment and the little pipe is in the ice chamber, and then constantly cycle air through. This will cool the chamber more efficiently…somehow. Dad calls the concept 'refrigeration,' and in theory it should work without the ice, though of course we're not that far."

"So, instead of having one waterbender check on the icebox every hour—if you're paranoid—we take an airbender out of the sky, where they're desperately needed, to have them stand guard over this 'fridge' thing twenty-four hours a day—and then still have the waterbender check on it every hour? No, I don't think we'll be building this one, Wheels." Toph walked away, bemused; for every good idea the Mechanic had, he had three crazy ones. Without eyes, Toph watched over her little empire. There were waterbenders, earthbenders, firebenders, and airbenders, all drilling (though she had to take others' word for it with the last group).

Someday soon, Sozin's Comet was going to return. And when it did, Toph's firebenders would be waiting for it outside the walls of Ba Sing Se—along with the rest of her troops, of course. Like when the Sun Warriors threw off the yolk of the Empire of the Clouds, the coming of Sozin's Comet would herald hope and victory for the virtuous and the end of a decadent, evil empire. Long Feng will fall. The Dai Li will fall. Ba Sing Se will fall.

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**AN:** Toph Fact #1 is based on one submitted by "Kiri the Airbender". Thanks, Kiri! "Sun Kissed Demigod" also submitted some, though it's too late to work them into this chapter—really, the only reason I got Kiri's in was because I actually went back and added that entire section in later. I'll see about working in some of SKD's, even though they're _all_ ripped off of Chuck Norris Jokes (and anyone else who cares to contribute, as well).


	4. Chibi Parody of Chapters 1 & 2

**AN:** The question you are no doubt asking yourselves is—have I lost my mind? Granted, this sort of breaks up the flow of my story, but I've always wanted to lampoon my own work—and I finally grew the mettle to do it. Besides, breaking up the story every now and again can be a good thing.

Also, you should be imagining this parody as being chibis. For those you who don't know what a chibi is, did you see any of the Super Deformed Shorts? Those were chibis.

The World without the War

S-Michael

Chibi Parody of:

Chapters 1 & 2

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Chibi Azula entered Chibi Hokoda's house. "Where are you dirty water peasants hiding the Avatar?"

"And it's lovely to see you, too," said Chibi Hakoda. "Say, so long as you're looking for the Avatar, why don't you take Sokka and Katara with you?"

"Is Katara the Avatar?"

"…No…"

"Then why do I need your kids with me?"

Chibi Hakoda looked shifty-eyed around the place, then whispered. "Look, I just need them out of my hair for a few days. The walls in here are made of ice. They do not muffle sound _at all_. Do you have any idea how long it's been since my wife and I f—"

"Okay, okay! I'm sure I can have them carry my luggage for me, or something. Just…give me some brain bleach, okay?"

"Hey, kids, get out here! You're going on a trip!" Chibi Sokka and Chibi Katara appeared.

Said Chibi Sokka: "Aw, man; chibi me looks totally lame."

"Oh, hush, you're cute," Chibi Azula said.

"Kids, before you go out into the big wide world, there is something that you need to know," Chibi Hakoda said. "Katara, Sokka. You guys and I are Very. Sexy. People. I mean," he whipped off his shirt, "just _look_ at me."

"I'm scarred for life!" cried Chibi Katara.

"Oh, _I'm_ looking," Chibi Azula said.

"Anyway, kids, being Very Sexy People, you are going to run afoul of vile entities known as _shippers_. They will try to pair you up with every member of the opposite sex that you find. And the same sex. And introduce some Mary Sues for you to pair with, as well. You'll even be paired with each other."

"Aw, gross!"

Said Chibi Azula: "Bored now. Let's go."

"Aren't we forgetting something?" Chibi Katara asked.

"Don't worry, we can get to it later."

So they got onto Chibi Azula's ship and set sail.

"Ooh, let's go to that island!" said Chibi Sokka, pointing at Kyoshi island.

"No, we're not going there," Chibi Azula said.

"Aw, but that's where Suki lives."

"Which is _why_ we're not going there."

"But, who will beat me up, thus teaching me the error of my sexist ways before they've had time to become an established character trait, while at the same time bonding with me so that a relationship can later bloom?"

Chibi Azula then beat him up. "Is that better?"

"Does this mean you want to be my girlfriend?"

"Um, no," Chibi Azula lied blatantly.

"Daw, how cute! You have a boyfriend!" Chibi Ty Lee said, jumping out of the air with her glider.

"You're not an airbender!" The glider suddenly disappeared in a puff of smoke with a _poof_ sound. "And Sokka's not my boyfriend. I just don't want you touching, flirting with, or even thinking about him."

"Aw, A_zu_la! I wanted to be an airbender!" Chibi Ty Lee pouted. "Big meanie."

"Um, Azula?" Chibi Katara asked. "Correct me if I'm wrong, but we're going to the North Pole, aren't we?"

"Yeah, so?"

"It's just…" Chibi Katara looked both ways, and then whispered, "Yue."

"Pfft. Like I'm afraid of _her,_" Chibi Azula waved her hand dismissively. "I'm a totally badass Dark Action Girl princess, while she's just a dumb old Princess Classic. She doesn't even have moon powers yet."

Said Chibi Katara, dryly: "The flames will begin in three…two…one…"

"Yeah, like I'm afraid of flames. I'm from the _Fire_ Nation, remember?"

"So…'bending fight?" Chibi Katara asked.

"'Bending fight!" Chibi Azula and Chibi Katara ran behind the wheelhouse.

"That would surely be an epic battle," Chibi Jee said.

"You just want to see them get hot and wet, don't you?" Chibi Sokka asked.

"…No…"

"Hey, let's go see King Bumi," Chibi Ty Lee said.

"Eh, sure, why not?"

And so they all took off on Chibi Ty Lee's flying bison. Elsewhere, Chibi Zhou and Chibi Toph were staring at the Fourth Wall.

"Weren't we supposed to be in this chapter somewhere?" Chibi Toph asked.

Chibi Zhou looked at her. "_Oh my God—you're so freaking adorable, Chibi Toph!_ It's like a pile of puppies and kittens were vomited up by a unicorn! I just want to squeeze you!"

"Try it and you die," Chibi Toph warned.

"…Can I pinch your cheek?"

"No."

"Can I—?" A giant rock fell on his head.

The Chibi Mechanic ran up. "No! Now this story's final arch doesn't have a villain! What have you done?"

"Oh, relax, Chibi-land is non-canonical. Also, no one dies for real here."

A cartoonishly flattened Chibi Zhou crawled out from underneath the rock. "It's true."

Chibi Kasha entered. "Hi. I'll be important in chapter four."

"No one cares, OC! Chibi-land is for canon characters _only_," Chibi Toph said.

"You're mean!" Chibi Kasha pouted, and stamped away while Chibi Toph stuck her tongue out at him.

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**AN:** I don't know about you, but the whole "It's like a pile of puppies and kittens were vomited up by a unicorn!" line gets funnier every time I read it; when I was writing it, I was like, "That's kind of dumb," but by the end of the night, I could barely control my laughter.

The Chibi Toph that informed the line was one I saw in a picture called "Toph Cookie" on Deviant Art. And it's freaking adorable.


	5. Ch 3: Omashu and the North Pole

The World without the War

S-Michael

Chapter 3:

In Which Our Heroes Visit Omashu and the North Pole

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"Welcome to Omashu, capital of, well, Omashu, third most prosperous state in the Earth Kingdom," Ty Lee said, doing the tour guide thing. "Omashu is also currently ranked seventieth in the Earth Kingdom Rock Ball Tournament."

"Pfft. Seventieth," Sokka said.

"Seventieth out of some seven hundred and change states isn't bad," Ty Lee defended. "Besides, you know how they play Rock Ball? They play it with rocks."

"She's not kidding," Azula added. "The goalposts are rocks, the field is a giant rock, the ball is a rock—hence the name—and the knee and elbow pads? Also rocks. The game's only played by earthbenders, of course. I mean, I get that this is the Earth Kingdom, but seriously? That would be like if _our_ national sport was playing with matches."

They flew to the observation deck of Bumi's palace and landed, where Bumi was standing with a young woman at his side. "Azula, Ty Lee! Good news! Tsubasa here," he gestured at the young woman, "is a renegade airbender exiled from the Northern Air Temple for using a forbidden technique, and has agreed to show you a jet stream which will shave days off your travel time. But first, let's eat. And I'm sure you would all like to sleep in real beds for at least one night. And on the way to dinner, let's talk business. But before we do _that_, how about you introduce your new friends."

"Sokka and Katara of the Southern Water Tribe, King Bumi. King Bumi, Sokka and Katara. They're Chief Hakoda's children, and agreed to come with me in order to make my mission more of an international effort."

"Which reminds me of my business," Bumi said. "As you know, I was a close friend of Avatar Aang since early childhood. I'm also one of the most powerful earthbenders on the planet."

"What about Toph Bei-Fong?" Sokka asked.

"I don't know, never met the girl. And you can't prove otherwise. Although, I heard that if you have two copper pieces and Toph Bei-Fong has two copper pieces, Toph Bei-Fong has more money than you, so I'm not sure how I can beat someone who can warp basic economic and mathematical law to suite her purposes."

"Humanity isn't unworthy of Wan Shi Tong's knowledge; Wan Shi Tong is hiding because he heard that Toph Bei-Fong said books are dumb," Sokka responded.

"Every night, before he goes to bed, Long Feng checks his closet to make sure Toph Bei-Fong's not in there," Bumi answered.

"The reason flying bison fly is to get away from Toph Bei-Fong."

Bumi frowned. "I think I heard that one already."

"Yeah, well, it's my favorite," Sokka said.

"It is a good one," Bumi agreed.

"Oh, enough of this!" Katara snapped. "Sokka, either stop spewing these annoying 'Toph Bei-Fong Facts,' or find this girl and marry her. King Bumi—" she suddenly remembered that she was addressing royalty, "—I believe you said you had business with us?"

"Hmm? I did? Oh, right, I did. Didn't I? Anyway, as I was saying, I'm one of the greatest earthbenders there is, and I was a friend of the last Avatar, so I know a bit about how those weirdos think. Also, she's a waterbender, so she's going to need to learn earthbending. That being the case, I would be the logical choice to be the next Avatar's first teacher, don't you think?"

"Well…it would seem logical on paper," Azula said reluctantly.

And you being on a mission to catch the Avatar—"

"Find, Bumi; we're on a mission to _find_ the Avatar," Azula corrected.

"What did I say?"

"Catch."

"Well, that wouldn't make sense, would it? Anyway, since you're on a mission to find the Avatar, it would only make sense for you to deliver my formal invitation to her, wouldn't it?" He handed her a scroll with Omashu's official seal on it.

"And the fact that this increases the international weight behind our mission has nothing to do with it, I assume?" Azula asked rhetorically.

"Oh, would it do that? What a happy coincidence."

"Uh-huh, sure. I see where Uncle gets it," Azula said.

"Gets what?" Bumi asked. "I hope it's not contagious; I'm awfully old, after all. By the way, if you're going to go see the sights tonight, I have to warn you, there's a curfew."

"You instigated a curfew?" Azula asked, surprised.

"Of course not. The Dai Li did. In their infinite wisdom. And you can be sure that's my honest opinion, because there's no way they could be spying on me in my own palace. Yep; none at all. Surely, such a thing would be impossible."

"Yeah, we get it already," Sokka said.

"Oh, I know; I just like saying it over and over again, as loudly as possible. It drives certain people crazy," Bumi said.

Azula chuckled; she felt sorry for the poor, foolish Dai Li operatives sent to rein herd on King Bumi! He'd probably already sent a station commander or two to the loony bin.

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It was late at night, and King Bumi went to bed. Or did he? The Dai Li paid very close attention to this room with their earthbending sense in order to make sure that the king didn't slip through the walls. The problem was, there was a trap door in the floor—the wooden floor, which they couldn't sense through (and even if it hadn't been wood, they were no pack of Tophs, to be able to "see" with earthbending, so he should have been safe so long as his escape didn't involve 'bending, but why take unnecessary risks?).

The trap door was cleverly disguised…_as_ a trap door. There were two sets of doors, one in the floor of Bumi's room, and one in the ceiling of the floor below; there was, of course, a Dai Li operative watching the trap door from below, but there was two feet of space between one floor's ceiling and another one's…well, floor. The Dai Li did not realize that it was possible to open only the upper doors, and to do so silently, and, once that was done, to open a panel in the side of the shoot and crawl into the floor. Oddly enough, no one seemed to be the least bit curious as to why he had a trap door in his bedroom in the first place.

Bumi crawled through the space between the ceiling and the floor until he reached the stairwell, and then he followed it…up. Even if one suspected that his trap door was anything other than it appeared to be, or, well, actually was what it appeared to be, they'd expect him to travel _down_, to ground level, not _up_, to the highest point in the whole palace. Eventually, he arrived at his destination, and climbed through an earthen hatch onto the roof.

"About time you got here," Toph said. Her companion, an airbender, didn't speak.

"Eh, I had business to attend to," Bumi said.

"Really? Anything I should know?"

"Princess Azula is searching for the Avatar."

"I see. If she finds her, that could either be really good or really bad for my plans," Toph said. "I'm fully convinced I'm right, but the Avatar tends to also be for order and harmony, and my plans for the future of the Earth Kingdom…aren't."

"The Avatar has a natural tendency to want harmony and order, but I don't think you're giving him—uh, her, I suppose I should be saying—enough credit," Bumi said sagely. "The Avatar is about justice."

They discussed business for a while.

"I don't suppose I have to ask if the next shipment of weapons is going to make it," Toph chuckled. "I wish I had you at base camp, no one can pull a completely out-of-left-field solution to an impossible problem out of their ass like you."

"Sorry, but I'm more useful here. Besides, I can't leave. If I were to leave, who's to say I wasn't gallivanting about with that bandit, rebel, and all-around traitor to the Earth King, Toph Bei-Fong?"

Toph laughed. "Well, I best be getting on. I've got business here and there. Then I'm going to meet a friend near Saibei."

Bumi opened the hatch in the roof, and before shimmying back down into his crawlspace, rested a hand on her shoulder. "I just want you to know that I think we're about as close as a creepy old man and a twelve-year-old child should ever be." And with that he was gone.

"I did _not_ need that image in my head!" Toph sighed, and nodded at her companion. With that, they left the way they came: by air.

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"Do we have to wear this stuff?" Azula asked. "These leather pants are chafing me."

"Yes, you do, it's very cold up there," Tsubasa said.

"_You're_ not wearing leather," Katara observed.

"Well, I'm an airbender; I can weave a cushion of air around me to protect me from the cold. You, however, can't, so you have to wear non-bender travel clothes. Everybody ready? Let's go. Yip, Yip!" Fluffy did nothing. "Aw, you stupid animal."

"Don't talk to Fluffy like that!" Ty Lee said. "Fluffy, go time!"

The flying bison took off.

"Honestly, aren't you airbenders supposed to have an affinity for these things, or something?" Sokka asked.

"If you'll recall, I _was_ banished," Tsubasa said. "Tell this flea-bitten beast to follow me." She jumped off and flew ahead.

"Don't listen to that big meanie, Fluffy," Ty Lee cooed. "You are _not_ flea-bitten. Or stupid!"

"I would not lean over the side of the saddle, if I were you," Sokka said nervously.

"You think _Ty Lee_ is going to lose her balance?" Azula asked bemusedly. "The moon would sooner forget to rise."

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"Greetings. I am Chief Arnook, and this is my daughter, Princess Yue."

"Hi," Sokka said to Yue.

"Greetings, I am Princess Azula, fifth in line for the throne of the Fire Nation, these are my companions, Ty Lee, also of the fire nation, Sokka and Katara, the children of Chief Hakoda of the Southern Water Tribe, and Tsubasa, of…" Azula looked at Tsubasa leadingly.

"Nowhere in particular," Tsubasa said.

Chief Arnook looked at Katara. "Are you the Avatar, then?"

"What? No. In fact, we came here to ask you…"

Chief Arnook nodded. "I see. And I tell you, you can't imagine how overjoyed it makes me to realize that the rest of the world does not think we can learn _one lesson_ in some nine hundred years," he said dryly.

"I would say, rather, that nine hundred years is a long time for the lesson to wear off," Azula said.

"Bull. Every Avatar since has come here for training. The females so that the lesson would _not_ wear off, and the males so that it wouldn't be insulting when the female Avatars came. To answer your question, no, she is not here."

"That was rather unequivocal," Azula said. "Hakoda told me that it wouldn't be proper to tell me before telling her, so all he could say was that she hadn't turned sixteen yet if she _was_ there."

"A female Avatar born here would figure it out sooner than most. For one thing, she'd be the only girl in the martial waterbending classes," Arnook said. "So I suppose that I should say that all I can say is that if she's here she's not over five, but I already let the cat-fox out of the bag."

"I see," Azula said. "I don't suppose you have any idea where_ else_ I might find waterbenders?"

"Saibei," Arnook said. "Our men go there to hunt and trade, and, sometimes, our women go there to…ah…"

"Escape from arranged marriages?" Katara asked.

"Er, yes, that," Arnook admitted. "It's less than a day away by kayak, probably less by flying bison, but since the majority of you are royalty…of a sort…I suppose I ought to invite you to a feast we're having in a couple days' time.

"Oh, sure, we'd love to stick around," Sokka said. The others stared at him. "But it's Azula's decision."

"I suppose it couldn't hurt, and we are awfully saddle sore," Azula said.

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Sokka had fallen in a canal, but it was worth it. Yue had seen to it that he got dried up, had actually talked to him, and was actually talking to him. "Tell me, Sokka," she said,"you travel with four lovely women; is any of them your…?"

"Huh? Oh, no."

"I confess I find it hard to believe," Yue said.

"Katara's my sister, Tsubasa's a bitch, Ty Lee has, like, ten boyfriends, from what I can tell, and Azula…well, she doesn't return my feelings," Sokka said.

"She must be insane," Yue said. "You're like no other boy I've ever met."

"How's that? Handsome? Charming? Funny? Capable of two way communication?"

"That one," Yue said.

"Huh?"

"You're talking _to_ me right now, not at me or about me. You actually pay attention to what I'm saying. Most boys don't."

"They're bastards. _I_ could listen to you all day."

She looked at him, blinking away tears. "You are so sweet." She kissed him, then pulled away. "I can't. I just can't!"

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"Calm down, my son," Wakaun said. "What's bothering you?"

"It's that southern peasant, Father—Sokei!" Hahn said. "He's been making passes at my woman. I saw them together last night."

"I see," Wakaun said, rubbing his beard, which was shot with gray, in thought. "Yue will not betray you, my son. She loves the tribe too much." _I almost wish she would; we could absolutely _hammer_ Arnook over the head if she did._ "Still, something will have to be done to teach the son of Hakoda to respect the sanctity of marriage bonds."

"What will we do, Father?"

"_You_ will do nothing. And neither will I…other than to write a letter to an old friend of mine. After all, it's not like we don't know where they're going next."

Hahn nodded, Wakaun nodded in return, and then retreated to his writing room. He'd already been writing to Doro Kim about the people about to visit his territory; now he just tweaked the facts a little bit to get the Saibei station commander to do as he wanted. This disinformation would completely ruin Doro Kim's own plans, but Wakaun had never entertained high hopes for Doro Kim's plans in the first place. Far too elaborate, with far too many moving parts. For his part, Wakaun had always hoped only to delay the inevitable for as long as possible, maximize his profits from the whole arrangement, and to avoid getting splashed when Doro Kim fell face first into the steaming tub of sewage. Now, though, he figured that if the whole thing was going to fall, he might as well use the collapse to revenge himself and his son on the southerner.

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"Where's Sokka?" Azula asked.

"Out wooing the princess. Again," Katara said.

Ty Lee frowned. "But Azula's right here."

"Princess Yue, Ty Lee."

They heard laughter outside. "Tell me another one, Sokka," Yue said.

"Okay, um, 'Toph Bei-Fong does not jump. She stares down gravity, and it changes direction.'" Yue laughed. "More? Okay. 'The Great Spirit Yawa took Toph's sight in an effort to keep her from becoming the most powerful force in the universe.'"

"I never heard of the Great Spirit Yawa."

"That's because he failed," Sokka said ominously. Yue laughed. Then Sokka sighed. "Well, this is my place. I guess I'll see you."

Yue sighed. "Yeah. For what it's worth, it's been real nice. Too bad it can never be."

"But it can. Run away from here, Yue."

"I can't run away with you, Sokka—"

"This isn't _about_ me, Yue. Don't get me wrong, having you at my side would make me the happiest man in the world, but we're talking about you. Even if you ended up with someone else—and the fact is, guys like me are a dime a dozen out in the wider world—I'd still be happy that you got away from this horrible place. What they want you to do…it will be the death of you."

"My people need me to do this, Sokka!"

"Your people don't have the right to make you do this! This is far more than they deserve!"

"I don't care what they deserve, they're _my people_, Sokka," Yue said with finality. "These are my father's subjects, and when I have a son, they'll be his subjects, too. I don't know what your father taught you about rulership, but around these parts, it comes with certain responsibilities attached!" Her expression softened, and so did her voice. "I'm sorry, Sokka, but I have to do this. And that means I can't be with you, my love." She kissed him, and left.

Sokka sighed. Then he looked in the window. "Were you guys eavesdropping this entire time?" he demanded.

"It was kind of hard not to," Katara apologized. "What's happening?"

"You remember that celebration Arnook told us about? The one that happens tomorrow? It's Yue's wedding. She's marrying some jerk named Hahn, because it's the only way to prevent a schism between Arnook's followers and Wakaun's—that is, Hahn's father's."

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They'd stayed to see the wedding. Sokka had wanted to kiss Yue, one last time, but that wouldn't do, not in public; Yue had to live with these people, after all. And so, Sokka had behaved himself. And then they left for Saibei. Sokka sat at the back of the saddle, staring off at the horizon.

Azula sat next to him. "You okay?" Sokka grunted neutrally. Azula tried to find a way to make him look on the bright side, "At least Hahn was about our age, instead of, like, thirty…or _more_. That's relatively rare around here," and failed miserably.

"That is too disgusting for words," Sokka said. Well, at least he was speaking. Then: "This is why everyone hates the Water Tribes, isn't it?"

"Well, everyone thinks they're better than everyone else…but yeah, you're pretty much universally recognize as the scum of the planet," Azula said.

"Thanks for not sugarcoating it, at least."

Azula grimaced; she'd been _trying_ to sugarcoat it, actually. "Look, I'm not exactly thrilled to see you chasing other girls, but still, I feel for you."

Sokka looked at her, confused. "Back on the ship, you said you didn't have feelings for me."

"That was a kneejerk reaction; Ty Lee had been ribbing me on the subject of you for three days straight," Azula said.

"So what do you feel now?" Sokka asked.

"I…don't know."

Sokka looked at the horizon, and nodded. "That's just as well. I'm not ready to jump into another relationship yet."

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Sokka needed air. He left the inn in Saibei City just an hour shy of midnight and walked down a nearby ally. He stubbed his toe, and cursed. Then he noticed that he was being followed. He began to run, but it was too late; snow off of a nearby roof liquefied and snared him like a living tentacle. A hood was placed over his head, and the world went black.


	6. Ch 4: A Lead and Unexpected Allies

**AN:** To the Honorverse fans: this chapter is going to look a little bit like _From the Highlands_ in a couple of scenes (or in the case of the first scene, a _lot_), but I assure you that it's not FTH with the serial numbers filed off; for one thing, I'd never be able to distil it down to approximately three thousand words (or even six thousand, when I decided to split the chapter in two), and for another, even if Kasha's an expy, the rest of the cast aren't (aside from one other OC).

Also, since Kasha isn't _actually_ Cachat, the scene with the healer isn't OOC.

_Also_ also, thanks to Sun Daughter, who beta'd chapter three and would have beta'd chapter two if only I'd given her a reasonable timetable. Thanks. Meant to say something last chapter, but I forgot.

The World without the War

S-Michael

Chapter 4:

In Which Azula and Friends Follow a Lead and Unexpected Allies are Revealed

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_This is crazy,_ Kasha thought. Really, he was just _begging_ to have "the Earth King" "invite" him to Lake Laogai. The uncertainty was powerful enough to hold him rooted for over a minute. Absurdly, he patted down his Dai Li uniform, as though making sure everything was in place, and touched his braid, which was still short; until joining the Dai Li, he'd had a peasant's haircut.

Fortunately, the grubby little tavern was so crowded and dimly lit that his immobility went completely unnoticed. It was certainly unnoticed by the woman he was staring at. Usani was already half-drunk. True, the woman sitting at the bar was neither swaying nor slurring the few words she spoke to the bartender, but in this, as in everything, she kept herself under tight control.

Which is what decided Kasha. After all, even if she ratted on him to Doro Kim or his flunkies, he could always claim she was too drunk to know what was going on. Certainly, Doro Kim had made enough wisecracks about the very subject. The woman was in her late thirties, and the way she was drinking, she wouldn't last another couple of decades. This, in a world where people regularly lived into their hundreds.

The seat next to Usani was vacated, and he quickly took it. The army colonel was hunched over, ignoring the world outside her mug of ale. Or so Kasha thought. "This is a gross violation of procedure," she said without moving her eyes from her glass. "Not to mention the fact that you're breaking every rule of tradecraft. Doro Kim would skin you alive." Usani sipped her drink. "Well, maybe not. Dodo Head's a bureaucrat. What he knows about field work wouldn't tax the brains of a pigeon-bat. But what's more important—_way more—_is that I'm off duty and you're disturbing my concentration."

Kasha was at once ticked off and awed, the latter because she had the gall to not just give Doro Kim an insulting nickname, but use it to one of his Dai Li underlings. "Go to hell. As much practice as you get, you could drink in the middle of an earthquake without ever spilling a drop."

Usani chuckled. "So wonderboy knows how to curse, after all."

"I learned to swear before I learned to talk. That's why I don't do it."

"Oh, what a thrill; another Lower Ring guttersnipe is about to spin his tale of poverty and deprivation. I can't hardly wait."

Kasha reined in his temper. He was a bit shocked at the effort it took; it was his own fear bubbling up, he realized. He'd learned to control himself by the time he was six years old; that was how he had survived dark, damp, soul-crushing Kojin Orphanage, and clawed his way out of the Lower Ring. "Never mind that; I know I'm breaking tradecraft, but I needed to talk to you and couldn't think of another way to do it."

"Right, because I'm going to talk to the nice, cute Dai Li operative so that he can entrap me into saying something treasonous and win a free trip to Lake Laogai." Usani snorted. "Yeah, that's right; I know about Lake Laogai. And if you want to drag me off to an interrogation room, you're going to need a few buddies to help you." Kasha knew that, in spite of her appearance (somewhere between motherly and slovenly, with a thick crop of wild brown hair), Usani had a fierce reputation as a brawler and an earthbender; it would no doubt take a whole squad of Dai Li to bring her in…and not all of them would survive. More, if they intended to take her in alive. She could have been a general by now…if she had the least ability to kowtow and play The Game. Or if she had the least inkling to do so. "Go look for a promotion somewhere else. It's not worth your life."

"I'm not trying to set you up for anything, Usani. I…need your advice." Usani raised an eyebrow, but otherwise made no indication that she heard him. "Doro Kim's been dealing with the Glacier Plateau Raiders." Usani still didn't respond. Kasha got mad. "Don't you care? Spirits, woman!"

Usani chuckled, but there was little real humor in it. "Poor, poor wonderboy; look who just found out that the Dai Li is a bit less pure and pristine than advertised. Why _shouldn't_ Dodo Head get cozy with the unparalleled scum of the planet? He's done everything else. Face it, kiddo, your precious Dai Li is rotten to the core. A little more slime won't even show."

Kasha flushed, but could say nothing.

"By the way, you were followed here."

"Shit!" Swearing twice in one day; he'd best be careful, lest he inadvertently make a habit of it.

"I'll be damned; I do believe you're the genuine article, wonderboy. Didn't know there were any of you left. How well can you take a punch?"

"Huh?" Kasha was thrown off and confused by the (seeming) non sequitur.

"Well, you're about to find out."

The next half minute was a complete blur. Kasha only had fragmented images: Usani roaring with rage, almost every word an obscenity. Customers in the bar scrambling away. Himself sailing through the air, landing on his back. Up again—somehow—sailing onto a table. Usani's face, contorted with fury, still roaring obscenities. Pain. Pain most of all. Kasha's attempts to defend himself were futile. Even in the chaos, he knew that Usani wasn't trying to kill him, or even hurt him that badly—which was a good thing, because she could have destroyed him utterly.

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_We have taken Sokka. Await further instructions._ That was all the note said. There was a look in Katara's eyes of pure, unmitigated fury. "We are going to find these people," she said, "and we are going to destroy them utterly."

"Yes; yes, we are," Azula thoroughly approved of this darker side of Katara. "First, we're going to need to find them, and I think we already have a lead. After all, there's only one person in the entire northern hemisphere that _I_ can think of who could possibly want to do Sokka ill."

Katara looked at her. "Hahn," she uttered the name dripping in vitrol.

"Hahn, indeed. I think it's time we returned to the Northern Water Tribe for a visit."

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Kasha was being healed up by a waterbender at the clinic. The healer was cute, but, alas, old enough to think of him as a _boy_ rather than a _man_, Dai Li uniform or no. At times like these, he regretted the short-even-for-his-age stature the average Lower Ring diet had cursed him with. "So, native to these parts?" Which didn't mean he wasn't going to try, of course.

There were as many waterbenders in Saibei as there were earthbenders, perhaps more, so it wasn't a ridiculous question. "Pretty much. My mother was pregnant with me when she ran away from her husband, a man named Wakaun. Technically, I suppose he's my father, but I don't think of him as such. Or at all, really."

"Huh."

Doro Kim walked in the door, interrupting him. "So, what happened?" He was a bald, cadaver-like man, who looked as if he'd been sitting behind a desk somewhere since the days of Avatar Roku, if not Avatar Kyoshi, in spite of not being much over forty. It wasn't that he looked _old_ for his age, _per se_, more…mummified.

"I was just trying to get Usani to cut down on her drinking. Looks bad for Ba Sing Se's image out here in the fifes."

"Yeah, well, that was stupid of you. Usani's alive for the sole reason that she's a war hero—police action hero, I suppose I should say," there hadn't been a war in the Earth Kingdom since the days of Chin the Conquerer; that was their story, gosh darn it, and they were sticking to it. "Fortunately, she keeps her mouth shut, so if she wants to drink herself into an early grave, you _let_ her, understand? That'll be one less problem in my hair when she finally succeeds, at any rate."

"Yes, sir."

The station commander nodded, and left.

The healer whispered in his ear: "There, you're healed. Usani is waiting for you." She led him to a storeroom in back of the hospital, where, as she said, Usani was waiting for him.

"You seem…sober," Kasha said doubtfully.

"And let that be a lesson to you; having a reputation as a drunkard can keep you out of as much trouble as really being one can get you into. I have a high alcohol tolerance, and don't drink as much as people think I do, either. Anyway, you wanted to talk, wonderboy; let's talk."

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The ice under Hahn's feet bucked, and at the same time a wind blew him on his ass. He fell, and slid, and suddenly the ice formed manacles, and he was staring at four girls. Azula pointed at him with her forefinger, from which sprang a small, hot, blue flame. "You're going to tell us everything we want to know, or the consequences will not be pleasant for you."

"I'm not afraid of you," Hahn said, voice trembling with fear.

"You're not?" Katara asked. "Be afraid of _me_, then. I can hurt you, heal you, hurt you some more, heal you some more…I think you see the pattern forming. Really, the unique tortures I can subject you to are only limited by my imagination, and I'm prepared to be rather imaginative. So tell me—what did you do to my brother?"

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Usani shook her head. "You're saying that Dodo Head had this Sokka boy kidnapped by the Raiders."

"I can't understand why."

"He's hoping to provoke an incident with a foreign power. Preferably the Fire Nation, as they're the only credible threat out there, and he intends to manipulate Princess Azula into creating the incident. And in return for their help in this, he's no doubt promised to turn a blind eye to the Glacier Plateau Raiders. Which, to be fair, isn't the same as saying he _will_ do so, but he's done _something_ to make them believe it."

"But…why?"

"Because with a foreign enemy to rally against, popular support for people like Toph Bei-Fong and her ragtag alliance of feudal states and bandit bands will evaporate. A war with the Fire Nation would probably go on for the better part of a decade—maybe two or three, if Dodo Head's lucky and the rest of us are not—before ending in a stalemate because the Fire Nation simply can't penetrate deeply enough into us to prove anything. Spirits know how many thousands of people on both sides will die, but that's not a consideration that's going through Dodo Head's head. He's a desk jockey, and his only concern is impressing Long Feng with how brilliantly he pulled off his brilliant plan, and cut Toph Bei-Fong's legs out from under her."

Kasha was flabbergasted. "Could it…actually work?"

"Of _course_ not, you idiot! I don't know what Dodo Head's specific plans are, but there's too many moving parts already—the raiders, the princess, her friends, the hostage, whomever tipped him off at the North Pole—and I guarantee he has a couple more up his sleeve in order to manipulate the princess. Dodo Head is being too clever for himself by far. And being a desk jockey, he didn't bother to have any backup plans, convinced of the infallibility of the plan. Something, somewhere, is going to come off the rails.

"The thing that's most likely to go off the rails, whether or not it's the _first_ thing, is that Princess Azula is going to make your wonderful station commander sit and spin while she shoots lightning out his mouth."

"Thank you for that image," Kasha said dryly.

"Princess Azula is a prodigy," Usani ignored him, "and when I say that, I mean she makes _you_ look like a drooling idiot child. She's quite possibly the third most powerful firebender in the world, after her father and uncle. She is also highly intelligent, composed, and, from everything I hear, ruthless as hell and possessing nerves of steel. _This_ is the person Dodo Head intends to make a patsy out of. The idiot.

"But even if we assume for the moment that whoever told Dodo Head that she's Sokka's lover only did so to get revenge on the boy for, I don't know, sleeping with his daughter or something (after all, _I_ haven't heard anything about this), and ignoring the fact that that itself would blow Dodo Head's plans clean out of the water, there's still Sokka's _sister_ to think about," Usani continued. "Who is also a prodigy. And who has been sparring with Azula on more-or-less equal footing.

"She might not be as ruthless as Azula, but I'd bet you anything you'd care to wager that she's no pushover—the Southern Water Tribe may not be as misogynistic as the Northern Water Tribe, but that doesn't mean that female waterbenders and warriors, don't have to put up with an extraordinary amount of shit in order to prove themselves. And Katara is one of the most respected waterbenders in the entire South Pole. Really, whatever core of ruthlessness that may exist in her soul is getting its day in the sunlight right about now, and rightly so.

"And Azula's still her friend, and so, even if Azula's not as inclined to rip Dodo Head's head off as I might think, she'd still be willing to put her in contact with her other friends.

"Ty Lee is already on Team Azula's roster, and she's the only non-bender I know of to have ever won an Agni Kai. I don't know much about this Tsubasa person, other than that she was exiled from one of the Air Temples for practicing some sort of dangerous, forbidden technique and that she's a 'voidbender', something the Sisters and Monks _usually_ only teach their most trusted members how to do.

"And then there's Azula's other friend, Mai, whose father is ambassador to the Northern Air Temple—which itself is less than a day away from here by flying bison. Also not a bender, but also a martial artist in Ty Lee and Azula's league. And _she_ has ties to—uh, never mind."

Suddenly, things clicked in Kasha's head with an almost audible sound. He gaped, literally. The elaborate cover of drunkenness, the paranoia inherent in having such an elaborate cover, and the fact that she knew all this, apparently with her own sources; suddenly, it all made sense. "You're working for Toph Bei-Fong."

"So there's a brain in that pretty head of yours, after all," Usani said. "I was hoping for a little more time before I had to find out just how far I could trust you, but yes. I'm working for Toph Bei-Fong. So, tell me, what are you going to do about it?"

Kasha shrugged. "I suppose that I'm working for Toph Bei-Fong, also, now."

"And I suppose I have to trust that you mean that." She sighed, then finished her lecture:

"The point is, it's only a matter of time until Dodo Head's plan crashes down around his ears. Which only makes it _more_ dangerous from the perspective of Team Azula," Usani said. "You see, when the wheels fall off, the first casualty is going to be Sokka."

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**AN:** Yeah, I know this chapter was heavy on the OCs, but I had several of them who needed to have their characters and plot-relevance established.

FYI, if you've read a certain fanfic entitled _The Princess and the Thief_, Kojin Orphanage may sound familiar. No, Kasha _didn't_ grow up with Nazumi the Mouse—it's just a shout out.


	7. Ch 5: Rescuing Sokka

**AN:** There's one more scene that's as close to nigh-plagiarized from FTH as one can get without removing 'bending and adding flachette guns and pulsers. But really, Honorverse fans, would you have me deprive you-know-who of their crowning moment of awesome? Didn't think so.

The World without the War

S-Michael

Chapter 5:

In Which Heaven and Earth are Moved to Rescue Sokka

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Wakaun walked into his house, and saw Azula leaning against a retaining wall. "What are you doing there?"

"Distracting you," she said.

Suddenly, Ty Lee jumped out of nowhere and rapid-fire jabbed him in his chi- and pressure points. "Hi," she said cheerfully as he dropped limply to the ground.

"What do you want?"

Katara came out from behind the retaining wall, dragging a bound and gagged Hahn. Azula lit her index finger, and began lazily melting curlicues into the retaining wall. "We're here for answers," Azula said, "and you're going to give them to us. Or else Yue is about to become a widow."

Wakaun swallowed. "You have my attention." He was incredibly composed, for all that he must have been scared out of his mind.

"Very good," Azula said. "So, what did you do with Sokka?"

"I have business dealings with the Dai Li station commander in Saibei, a man named Doro Kim. He has some harebrain scheme about starting a war with the Fire Nation, and I convinced him that he could use Sokka to manipulate you into creating an incident, claiming that the two of you are lovers. He's a natural when it comes to covering his own butt, so he'd have gotten the Glacier Plateau Raiders to do it for him."

"So your plan was to rely on the fact that the wheels would eventually come off of Doro Kim's plan, and being the ass-coverer he is, his first instinct will be to destroy the evidence—namely Sokka?" Azula deduced.

Wakaun said nothing, just smirked a little bit.

Katara and Azula exchanged a look, Azula nodded, and Katara approached Wakaun, squatting in front of him. "Look me in the eye. I need you to see how deadly serious I am. You see, we can't kill you yet, because we still need to confirm your story. You're not off the hook yet, though.

"The thing is, if he dies, _you_ die. And your son dies. Do not think that you can evade us, either, because we are very, very good at what we do. Azula and I are top-class benders, and Ty Lee is something even scarier. And being with Azula gives us diplomatic immunity, which I imagine will come in quite handily. She's also a fairly good tracker, I hear, though if her skills prove insufficient, it's not like she doesn't have fund to _hire_ the best tracker out there. What I'm saying is, there's no escape for you. If Sokka dies, you die, period. So if you care to change your story, I recommend you do it now, while we're still in the 'no harm, no foul' stage of things."

It probably said bad things about Azula that this was the moment when she decided that she really, really liked Katara.

"I told you the truth," Wakaun said, but he was no longer nearly as composed.

"I believe him," Azula said.

"Okay; that's good enough for me," Katara said. "Wakaun? Hahn? We were never here."

"One other thing," Azula said: "I'm sure being completely destroyed by three teenage girls has got your macho panties all up in a twist, and y'all're going to want to take it out on somebody, and that Yue is the closest, weakest tangentially related target you have available, but the thing is, Sokka would be wracked if something happened to her and it was 'his' fault, so I'm only going to say this once: Do not mistreat her, Hahn (and you should probably stay as far away from her as possible, Wakaun), because I'll be back, randomly, and if she's not walking on roses and sunshine, well, someone's going to be struck by lightning on a clear day; do you understand what I'm saying?" Katara really liked Azula, but up until that moment, she'd had some secret worries that there was a wolf under that Fire Nation clothing, and in that moment, all her fears about Azula went out the window. Whatever darkness she kept under such strict control, what Katara saw Azula do just now was one of the most selfless things Katara had ever seen anyone do ever (assuming she was right about Azula's feelings for her brother, at least). Azula nodded, satisfied that they got the message. "Let's go."

"The paralisation should wear off in a few more minutes," Ty Lee said as they left. "About twenty."

Tsubasa was outside serving as lookout. "You know something? I like the way you people operate. What now?"

"We visit a friend of mine at the Northern Air Temple," Azula said.

"Whoa, now, I can't go back there," Tsubasa said. "Banished, remember? I'll go back to Saibei City and keep an eye on things there. See you then."

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"Mai!" Ty Lee shouted, hugging her as they entered the room.

"Ty Lee. You're as disgustingly cheerful as ever," Mai said.

"Hello, Mai. How're things?" Azula asked.

"Oh, wonderful. It's so wonderful than my father is ambassador to the Air Nomads. So wonderful that I can't play any of the local sports. Wonderful that I only see my boyfriend once every other month."

"Zuzu misses you, too," Azula assured her. "I'm afraid we're here on business, though. This is my friend, Katara, and her brother has been kidnapped by the Glacier Plateau Raiders."

"That's unusual," Mai said, "they usually go for girls."

"Oh, so you know about them? That's excellent. We need all the information we can get."

"It all starts with the Northern Water Tribe," Mai explained."The thing is, the Northern Water Tribe is into arranged marriages. Not all of the women appreciate that, you see, so they run away. The most logical destination being Saibei or the surrounding area.

"As you might imagine, not all husbands are exactly thrilled when their wives run away, and so they post…bounties. And in come the bounty hunters. The Glacier Plateau Raiders are probably the single most misogynistic group of people on the planet. They're composed of ideologues from the 'Pole and sociopaths from the Earth Kingdom, all thrown together and blended to perfection. They…do not require much proof that a woman is a man's wife, other than that he can pay the 'finder's fee'. Scum of the Earth.

"Scourge of the greater Saibei-Ria area, more practically. The Princes of Saibei have traditionally hunted them like the vermin they are. And when Saibite authorities catch these 'Raider', what they do is…not pretty. Death by impalement right outside their precious glacier, so their buddies can see. It's a particularly nasty way to die. Personally, however, I find I have trouble sympathizing with their plight."

"Wait, the authorities know where they live?" Katara asked.

"Glacier Plateau Glacier is a big place, riddled with ice caverns and, you know, cavern-caverns. And the Raiders have waterbenders and earthbenders. So, yeah, their general location is known, but it doesn't do much practical good," Mai said. "Whenever an entrance to their hideout is discovered, they're quick to block it and move to another cave."

Suddenly, the room went dark—an impressive feat, considering it was midday and the room had bay windows. Mai sighed. "Toph, was that necessary?"

Toph earthbending-opened the windows she'd used earthbending to plug. "You know how I like making entrances. Toph Bei-Fong, at your service."

"Guys, Toph; Toph, guys," Mai said by way of introduction. Typically, one would think from her tone of voice that she were reading off inventory rather than making introductions for the most wanted person in the Earth Kingdom. "Any particular reason you felt you had to introduce yourself at this particular time, Toph?"

"Yes. These are the guys who are looking for the Avatar. It seems to me that it would be in my best interests if when they found her they had a positive opinion of me and/or owed me a favor." She grinned. "Besides, another friend of mine already asked for help with this very situation, oddly enough. She figured these people would be calling on you soon, Mai, and that I could make introductions."

"And how do you know we're looking for the Avatar?" Azula asked.

"We have several friends in common, though you don't know it. King Bumi, Mai, a few merchants in Sunshine. Don't look so surprised; 'All roads lead to Toph Bei-Fong,' you know."

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"So, how'd it go?" Tsubasa asked when Fluffy returned.

"We made some friends," Katara said. "This is Mai, Azula and Ty Lee's friend, and this is Mai's friend, Toph."

Tsubasa's eyes widened. "As in—?"

"I'd give you an autograph, if only I could write," Toph said.

Tsubasa shook her head. "You guys have the greatest adventures."

"While we're here, we've got to meet a friend of mine, and her friend," Toph said.

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Azula, Katara, Ty Lee, Mai, Toph, Tsubasa, and Usani were seated at the patio table, having all introduced themselves to each other, but Usani insisted that there was one missing. "So, where's your friend?" Just then, a Dai Li operative jumped off the roof into their midst in the Dai Li style.

"Everyone, this is Kasha," Usani said.

"But…he's Dai Li," Katara said.

"I've studied the Dai Li myself, Katara, and the thing is much more complicated than people realize," Azula said. "The image most people—well, in the Fire nation, at any rate—have of the Dai Li is that they're simply an organization of goons and thugs. And certainly, some of the vilest people on the planet are wearing Dai Li uniforms, especially those that volunteer to work in their secret reeducation centers."

Azula saw the look on Katara's face: "Didn't realize operatives had that kind of latitude, did you? It's quite a democratic outfit, in some ways, hard as that might be to imagine. They have to be, really; see, Long Feng knows, as did his predecessors, that men don't become monsters just because they put on the Dai Li uniform. Since there's no way to look inside someone's head and see if they're a monster or not, the best the Dai Li can do is to let their operatives sort themselves." She shrugged. "It's not a perfect system, but it works well enough. For their purposes."

Kasha grinned at Toph. "You know, a week ago, I'd have been hauling you in."

"You mean you'd have tried," Toph said. "Well, now that we're all here, we need to come up with a plan."

"Actually," Usani grinned wolfishly, "Kasha and I already _have_ a plan…"

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"Who's there?" one of the Raiders demanded.

"Relax, it's Doro Kim's messenger boy," the other said, recognizing Kasha.

Kasha hid his shame at his remembered naïveté, "The station commander ordered me to check on the prisoner."

"We hear and obey, great Dai Li lord," the second said sarcastically.

"Look, sorry if I come across as cold and imperious, but I've got my orders," Kasha said…icily. "Let's just do this so I can get out of here."

"Well, I s'pose there's no harm in it," the second relented. Kasha followed him into the glacier, ignoring a slight nervousness in the back of his mind.

Dai Li normally carried about twenty pounds of rock around, for use as cuffs and other such tools. If an earthbender trained his 'bending sense on Kasha, he might wonder why so much of the rock he was carrying was obsidian. Obsidian was a favored stone amongst the Earth Kingdom's surgeons…and assassins. It was a very, very sharp rock, obsidian. Especially when 'tempered' by earthbending.

They entered what appeared to be the Raiders' main living space, where some two dozen men were gathered. _I was afraid of this._

"There he is," the Raider pointed at a small, face-size hole in the wall. Kasha looked, and sure enough there was a chamber on the other side, and the boy in the cell matched Sokka's description.

"Yes, I shall inform Doro Kim," and without a second's hesitation or warning, he slit the Raider's throat. Obsidian blades were attached to his fingertips; "fatalons," someone without much good taste had nicknamed the technique long ago. He earthbended the floor beneath his feet for speed, moving to kill as many Raiders as possible before they had time to react.

Abstractly, Kasha understood his advantage—had planned for it. Despite his lack of actual combat experience, he had _trained _for this (though none of the people he got to train him had the least idea what the exercise was supposed to do). He _expected _what was happening, while the Raiders were still half-paralyzed with shock. Or, even where they weren't paralyzed, they had so much adrenaline unexpectedly pumping into them that their motions were too jerky, too violent. When they managed to get off shots, they missed their target—or hit one of their own. Up to martial standards, these people were not.

Earthbenders first, as they could mess with his earthbending, potentially, and he needed what advantage his speed would buy him. So he attacked those in Earth Kingdom clothing first. Only way to be sure. Earthbending gave him speed, sure, but so did being prepared for it, and ignoring everything but his goal—including things like safety, or even the plan. Kasha was supposed to scatter them with obsidian flachettes—after all, taking all these Raiders on on his own was crazy. The thing was, he didn't much care.

He was the stone fist of the Earth Kingdom, a champion of the people and the Earth Kingdom; so he thought himself, and so he was. Betrayed by the very people he'd sworn fealty to. And, quite frankly, for all his martial training and discipline, he was still, in the end, a kid. This was how he threw his temper tantrum.

He simply stepped into them and killed them, surviving by nothing more than speed, cold-bloodedness, and the sheer audacity of what he was doing. _I am Dai Li. Sneer and be damned! _Again and again and again, just as he had trained for in the years since he marched out of the slums to fight for his own. He made no attempt to take cover, no attempt to evade the 'bending of his enemies. Never realizing, even, that the sheer fury of his charge was his greatest protection. Kasha was no longer thinking of tactics. Like a berserker, he would meet his enemies naked, standing on the open field of battle—as he'd been _promised_. He would _make _it so. Sneer and be damned!

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Less than a minute after Kasha was escorted inside, the Raider left behind found himself in dire straits as Tsubasa drew the air from his lungs. He tried to gasp, tried to scream, but made no sound; there was no air. He collapsed, unconscious…then dead.

In spite of the nature of Toph's struggle, she always regretted when someone had to die, even scum like this. In a sense it was comforting to have this reassurance that she was still human…in the sense that gallows humor was humor. Tsubasa also used her voidbending to extinguish torches as well as human lives.

Several times in the maze, Kasha's path left earth, and Toph would have to trust Usani to track him via scuff marks he'd leave at intersections. Toph didn't like that, and not just because her feet got cold, either. It wasn't that she didn't trust Usani; just that, even after all these months of being a rebel leader, she didn't like relying on other people. Eventually, the path ended in what appeared to be a main living area (with an earthen floor, thank the spirits). Apparently, Kasha had located Sokka, because he killed his guide…and then kept on killing; it quickly became readily apparent that he wasn't going by the plan.

"Usani? Hate to break it to you, but your friend is crazy," Toph said. "Well, we'd best keep him from getting his stupid ass killed. Tsubasa, your part of the plan still stands—" she was to suck all the air out of any adjoining passages so that sound—and people—couldn't travel out or in "—but as for the rest of us…let's be about it."

Azula fired lightning at the Raiders farthest from Kasha, frying three of them and knocking a fourth unconscious. With that, the battle was joined. And, shortly enough, it was over.

"What about this Doro Kim person who sicced these vermin on Sokka in the first place?" Azula asked as Katara waterbended a hole in the wall of Sokka's cell.

"Don't worry," Usani said. "Kasha and I will take care of _him._"

"Could someone help me wash off all this blood?" Kasha asked suddenly, as though to punctuate Usani's statement.

Azula nodded. "Good," she said savagely.

"Katara," Sokka said, hugging his sister. After a few seconds, he let her go. "Azula."

"I—"

He kissed her.


	8. Ch 6: Sokka and Azula Kiss

**AN:** We may have been channeling Erik Flint for two chapters, but that does not mean the rest of the _Avatar_ world has been sitting idly by. Let's start this chapter by looking back…

**AN2:** Four weeks from yesterday's my birthday. Huh. A quarter of a century old, I'll be, and I haven't done anything with my life… Depressing.

The World without the War

S-Michael

Chapter 6:

In Which Things Happen Before Sokka and Azula Kiss

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_The last thing Sokka remembered was being knocked out by those thughish-looking waterbenders, but now he was sitting under a tree on a grassy knoll. An old airbender was with him. "Who are you?"_

_The airbender rubbed his moustache. "I am Avatar Aang."_

"_Avatar Aang! How can I be talking to you? Am I dead?"_

"_Relax, Sokka, son of Kya and Hakoda, you are not dead."_

"_Am I the Avatar, then? I thought it was supposed to be a girl. And, you know, a 'bender."_

"_You are not the Avatar, either. Shut up and let me explain." Aang waited a moment. "Good. Let's sit." They sat under the tree. "There are hot springs under Glacier Plateau—where you are now—which is why it is so riddled with caves. Naturally, this makes it a good hideout for waterbending criminals in the Earth Kingdom. It's rather sad that the Glacier Plateau Raiders have given this place such a bad name, for there is quite a bit of spiritual energy in some of these springs. Like the one that runs through your cell. This is how I've been able to contact you._

"_Sokka, you have to find the Avatar and bring her to the Fire Nation before Sozin's Comet returns. Something bad is going to happen if you don't."_

"_Gee, way to be specific, O mighty Avatar. 'Something bad,' wow."_

"_Hey, when a spirit pierces the veil and contacts the living, there are rules that have to be followed," Aang said. "Sorry."_

"_Well, no problem, there's only some sixteen thousand or so waterbenders in Saibei—"_

"_She's not there. Or in Ria, or in any of the smaller fifes of the region," Aang said._

_The scene changed, and Sokka was bodilessly observing a girl who apparently thought leaves were appropriate articles of clothing waterbend in a swamp._

"_Find her, Sokka. Find her and bring her to the Fire Nation."_

Sokka woke up. _What a trippy dream_, was his first thought, but then he observed his surroundings. He was, in fact, in a cell made of ice, with a stream running through it. (It came out of the wall in an elevated trench, then fell sharply to another one in the floor. How kind of the Bad Guys to let Sokka know which one he was supposed to drink out of and which one he was supposed to use as a bathroom.) He touched the stream; lukewarm, like, well, hot-spring water channeled through ice for a short distance, he'd imagine. Right, then; there might be something to this dream, after all.

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"My liege, we found something," the head librarian said. He handed Iroh a parchment. The Firelord unrolled the document, and saw a drawing of a pendant. "Kai's Pendant, the document calls it. Kai was the chief of a small Sun Warrior village some two millennia ago and change. His village was destroyed by airbenders when he refused to submit to the Empire of Clouds, so mad with grief, he went to a place where the veil between this world and the spirit world were thin, and he made a bargain with Koh the Face Stealer, acquiring a pendant which would allow him to summon a legion of a thousand spirits.

"But Koh tricked him. He could summon the spirits, yes, but couldn't control them. After barely surviving long enough to dispel the spirits, Kai traveled to the Empire of Air, walked into the central square of the capital city and summoned the spirits again, apparently figuring that if he couldn't control the spirits, he could at least do as much damage with them as possible. He was killed by the spirits, but it took the Imperials six months to solve the problem."

"But they _did_ solve it, yes?" Iroh asked.

"By digging a hole thousands of feet deep a thousand miles from anywhere, tossing it in, and burying it," the librarian said.

"Well, we'd best send this to commander Zhou in the field. He's the man on the spot, after all."

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_Sokka was dreaming. In his dreams, he was a little man with big dreams who lived long ago. He traveled to the cell in the company of two guards. This prisoner was dangerous. Dangerous? Hell, he wasn't even really human. Another guard opened the door, and what appeared to be a young man was chained to the far wall. "You're Chin the Conqueror, I presume? Somehow, I expected someone shorter."_

_Chin began to retort angrily, then heard the last word, then stared at the prisoner baffled. _

"_Never mind; I see that one flew over your head. Not that that's a challenge."_

"_Do not mock me, prisoner!"_

"_The name's Ilmarinen, little man, and I'm here of my own accord. I'm here to see the man who would dare hunt me, and tell him to his face what a mistake he's making. Oh, and if you're hoping to steal my power, you're more than three centuries early."_

"_As a matter of fact, I realize that," Chin said. He was used to having to right with his own two hands the wrongs fate had dealt him, and had doubted that it would start being generous at this late a date. "I intend to attack the Avatar soon, and could use your powers when I do."_

_Ilmarinen stared at him balefully, like one would at a slow child. "In upwards of six centuries of life, I have never once sought personal power. And neither did most of my predecessors. What does that tell you?"_

"_Are you telling me you're afraid of the Avatar?" Chin asked. "Don't you have another three centuries of invincibility left?"_

"_No, I'm telling you that I'm not interested in fighting the Avatar. We agree on most things. And even if I was, I wouldn't do it on _your_ behalf."_

"_Well, disappointing as that is, I don't really need your _willing_ support," Chin said. "After all, that wonderful blood of yours is a weapon in its own right."_

"_Wanna see what my blood can do?" Ilmarinen suddenly pulled against his right arm's shackle with all of his bodily strength. It was solid steel, and well anchored to the wall; it didn't give. But Ilmarinen's flesh did. His thumb was ripped clean off, and from the wound poured a glowing, orange magma that melted and burned everything it touched except for Ilmarinen himself. He melted the rest of his bounds with it, burning his dirty clothes in the process. He was free._

_He grinned manically, and waved his hand at them. They all jumped back a pace. One of the gaurds let loose an arrow, which pierced Ilmarinen in the heart; the arrow caught flame. "And what, do you imagine, that _that_ will accomplish?" The flow of magma slowed and stopped as Ilmarinen's thumb grew back. He picked up a jagged piece of shackle, and held it close to his wrist, warningly._

"_Now, then," Ilmarinen said. "I have an idea. We're all going to be civil. I'm going to walk out of here, and you're going to let me. I go my way, you go back to tying to not die when you face the Avatar, and everyone lives to see sunset. Or you're all going to _burn!_ Do you understand me?"_

_Chin swallowed, and nodded. "Let him go, boys and girls."_

"_Very good!" Ilmarinen said._

"_Creatures like you should not exist in this world," one of the guards said as he passed._

_It was like the guard cast a spell. Suddenly, Ilmarinen wasn't an arrogant punk, certain of his own immortality (from experience any more); he was a tired old (impossibly old) man in a young man's body. "I've thought that myself, a time or three. Thousand. But I'm better than what was here before—by a long shot. Or do you imagine that _that_ part of the legend's untrue?"_

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Zhou received the letter from the Firelord. _Thank the spirits!_ Presuming, of course, that it said what he thought it would say, he'd be able to "find" "Kai's Pendant" a couple of weeks from now. Once he had it, he could recommend that it be taken to an abandoned desert island for safekeeping until it could be destroyed, and he wouldn't need to keep summoning these…things. The sooner they could stop running loose in the countryside, harassing civilians (and killing them if they could), the happier Zhou would be. After all, Zhou was many things (egotistical, self-centered, ambitious), but he liked to imagine that even he had standards.

He took the letter to his chambers, and read it there. It said pretty much what he thought it would say, only there'd been a note from Iroh saying that he had misgivings about the trustworthiness of this information. Zhou shrugged to himself, accepting it sangfroidly.

That was the problem with a tapestry of lies; it was, by nature, an artificial construct, and one could only walk in a forest laid out in neat rows for so long before one started to suspect that one was actually in an orchard. Similarly, you can always tell when a story is a lie, if you know what to look for. Everything fits together too well. Reality is chaotic and under no obligation to explain itself; it's legitimate by virtue of being, well, real. But the human mind wants order and answers, and when you make a story up, will unconsciously try to supply said order and answers.

To be fair, most people you'd lie _to_ are also human, and having a bunch of loose threads and unanswered questions would just cause them to sit up and take notice, which is something you don't want when lying. When you lie, you want people to lazily accept the "facts" you're presenting them, because no matter what you do, lies are always inferior to the truth in at least one way: they're not true. No matter what you do, if someone is skilled enough, determined enough, thorough enough, or even just plain lucky enough, they can find the truth. Or at least the lie.

So, yes, it was unfortunate that the Firelord doubted the accuracy of Zhou's faked documents, but it was something he half-suspected was going to happen all along (well, alright, more like quarter-suspected). He didn't seem to suspect that the _documents themselves_ were fake, rather that some scribe somewhere caught a flight of fancy, and he _certainly_ had no inkling as to _who_ faked them, or else he'd hardly be warning _Zhou_ about it! So, really, it was all well and good.

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_Sokka was dreaming. He was bodiless, just watching. The Council of Sisters was gathered, and they summoned a girl in. Sokka recognized Tsubasa, even though she looked funny with the front of her head shaved. She was about his age, so it was, what, two years ago? One or three?_

"_Tsubasa," one of the Sisters said, "do you know why you're here?"_

"_I imagine I do, ma'am."_

"_At least you're not trying to deny it. Tell us, Tsubasa, who taught you to voidbend?"_

"_No one taught me, ma'am. I found some old scrolls in a secret room."_

"_I see. There's a reason we only teach voidbending to airbenders we trust above all others, Tsubasa. Voidbending is a Domination technique."_

"_With all due respect, ma'am, so what?" Tsubasa asked. "Why should we avoid domination-airbending, just because the Empire of Clouds used it? Might I remind you that the Empire ruled the world for hundreds of years?"_

"_Might _I_ remind _you_ that the reason our ancestors became the Air Nomads was to escape from the thick miasma that _was_ the Empire of Clouds? These were men and women convinced of the superiority of their element, and in their conviction, they grew proud. And in their pride, they grew conceited. And in their conceit, they looked down on all the other peoples of the world. And in looking down grew contemptuous. And in their contempt, grew to be monsters. There _is_ a dark side to our art, young Tsubasa—and don't you forget it."_

"_But air _is_ the superior element!" Tsubasa said passionately. "Air moves water, weathers earth, and decides whether fire lives or dies! Why should I treat a firebender as my equal when I can do this—" she reached out a fist towards a candle, opened he palm, and the candle went out "—or this?" she wiggled her fingers, and the candle next to it flared. "Why should I treat a waterbender as my equal, when I can do this?" she used voidbending to suck water out of a bowl as though through a straw. "And as for earthbending…" She made a backhanding motion, and a chest-tall statue was blown onto its face._

"_We were great, once," Tsubasa continued. "These temples weren't made by _nomads_. We're living in the shadow of our ancestors' civilization. In a moment of weakness, surrounded by wrathful, vengeance-seeking enemies and betrayed by Avatar Taru, we turned our backs on their wisdom, but _we can have it back!_ We can have it _all_ back, any time we want to, if only we have the _will_ to _take_ it!"_

_The sisters were unimpressed by her speech. And Tsubasa seemed to have realized what she was saying and to whom. "I'm banished, aren't I?"_

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Being in the cell was hard. He thought of Yue, but that just made him depressed. He thought of Azula, but that just made him feel like he was being unfaithful to Yue. So he occupied himself by carving Toph Bei-Fong Facts into the walls with his boomerang. _Volcanoes erupt when Toph Bei-Fong is angry. Whenever Toph Bei-Fong sneezes, she causes earthquakes. The Fire Nation's military wears masks because they're afraid to look Toph Bei-Fong in the eye. The sun rises, but only because Toph Bei-Fong lets it. Toph Bei-Fong is not blind, she's simply incapable of seeing anything less awesome than she is._ And so on and so forth.

Sokka heard people approaching his cell. He looked at the window.

"There he is," a voice said.

A face looked in at Sokka, and nodded: "Yes, I shall inform Doro Kim." There was a sudden gurgling sound from the other voice, and the face was gone. Sokka could hear the sounds of death and destruction, so he ran to the window hole and looked out. A boy in a Dai Li uniform was slicing people's necks with what looked like very long fingernails. Or talons. Suddenly, there was lightning. _Azula! Azula and Katara came to rescue me…and they brought allies!_ Never mind just where they _got_ said allies. The battle was over soon enough.

"What about this Doro Kim person who sicced these vermin on Sokka in the first place?" Azula asked as Katara waterbended a hole in the wall of Sokka's cell. Sokka stepped out, and got a better view of the carnage.

"Don't worry," one of their allies, an adult woman, said. "Kasha and I will take care of _him._"

"Could someone help me wash off all this blood?" the Dai Li boy asked suddenly, as though to punctuate the woman's statement.

Azula nodded. "Good," she said savagely. Sokka looked at Azula, really looked at her, and saw a deep darkness deep inside of her. He realized that she could easily have been a monster, given the wrong situation. But she _wasn't_ a monster, though, he was sure of it…what she was was iron. She had darkness inside her, true, but she had it in a vise-grip, restrained. Controlled. Kept in a box, and to keep such a thing in a box, she had to be very, very strong indeed.

The realization caused a warm tingling in his body, which combined with the elation of freedom in very interesting ways.

"Katara," Sokka said, hugging his sister. After a few seconds, he let her go. "Azula."

"I—"

He kissed her.

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"Master Piandao, I have a confession to make," the apprentice said. Piandao knew that this apprentice had been hiding something, but couldn't figure out what—an oddity, for him. "Several, in fact. First, I am not long for this world. In fact, I'll be dead in exactly six months, twenty-three days, and—" he looked at the sun "—two, two and a half hours, tops." He seemed incredibly nonchalant about this for such a young man. "It's alright. I'm older than I look. Much older. Which leads me to secret number two.

"See, I am a much more accomplished swordsman—and especially blacksmith—than I let on. But the best measure of a man is how he treats his underlings, and I needed to weigh you, see if you were worthy of taking up my mantle when I die. And I've been impressed by you, not just as a swordsman and blacksmith, but also as a man. So it's time to reveal the truth.

"See, according to some people's definition of human, I stopped being it some thousand years ago." He slit his wrist, and bright orange magma bled out, dripping onto a pile of ore and _melting the ore_. The cut healed with absurd speed. "So, tell me, Master Piandao—how would you like to live for a thousand years?" asked Ilmarinen.

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**AN:** You know, at first, when I was just barely beginning to plan this story, Katara _was_ going to be the Avatar. At the very least, it would spare me an OC. But then I became convinced, ironically enough, that it would be hard to make people buy it. (What? Just because I _write_ fanfiction doesn't mean I _read_ fanfiction.) Now, however, it appears that the Katara-is-the-Avatar theme is common as, well, water…which is its own kind of deterrent. Besides, by the time that happened, I'd already become attached to the idea that the next Avatar was from the Foggy Swamp. And yes, I intentionally lead you on, anyway.


	9. Chibi Parody of Chapters 3 through 6

**AN:** That's right…it's filler time again!

**Fun Fact:** Wakaun's name means "serpent." According to , Wakaun is a Native American name…which is about as useful as categorizing a name as European would be for someone who doesn't know jack about European cultures. ("You mean to tell me that one probably _wouldn't_ find two kids named Stanislaw and Bob growing up in the same town? How was _I_ to know!") Still, it means serpent, and he is one, so I went with it. (Hahn, interestingly enough, is German.)

The World without the War

S-Michael

Chibi Parody of:

Chapters 3-6

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"Welcome to Omashu," said Chibi Ty Lee. "I'll be your guide. Over here we have the Great Pyramid of Omashu, while over there we have the Eiffel Tower of Omashu…wait a second…this isn't Omashu—it's Las Vegas!"

"Damn it, that's what we get for letting you drive," Chibi Azula said.

"It's okay," said Chibi Bumi. "I like Las Vegas better anyway."

"King Bumi! How'd you get on Fluffy?" Chibi Ty Lee asked.

"Some questions are best left unanswered. Anyway, I want you to meet Tsubasa." He paused. "Tusbasa? Where are you?"

"Chibi Toph said there's no OCs allowed in Chibi-land," came Tsubasa's voice. "I don't want her to hurt me. Airbenders are nomads because we're afraid of Toph, you know."

"Toph! Tell her that OCs are allowed in Chibi-land!"

Chibi Toph appeared in a cloud of smoke. "Fine. OCs are allowed in Chibi Land. So speaks the great and powerful Toph!"

"Oh my God," said Chibi Sokka. "It's like a pile of puppies and kittens were vomited up by a unicorn!"

"…I'm leaving now," said Chibi Toph. "None of you saw me!"

Chibi Tsubasa jumped onto Fluffy. "Alright, y'all, I'm going to lead you to the North Pole by the most efficient route."

"Uh, go north?" Chibi Sokka asked?"

"Nah, we're going to follow the jet streams, or some such nonsense," Tsubasa said. "And that means y'all need a wardrobe change."

"But we didn't in canon," Katara said.

Tsubasa blinked. "Look, just change clothes so Azula can say—"

"Do we have to wear this stuff?" Chibi Azula asked, having changed off-screen. "These leather pants are chafing me."

Chibi Ty Lee shook her head. "Azula, if the readers didn't get it the first time around, they're not going to get it now."

"That's a reference to something?" Chibi Sokka asked. "I thought S-Michael was just encouraging us to picture Azula in tight leather pants."

"More of a secret message. Anyway, with that out of the way, we can go," Chibi Tsubasa said. "Hey, Sokka, why don't you ride with me? Just remember to hold on tight?" Chibi Azula shot her full of lightning. "Aaah! On second thought, it's not worth my life. Have fun mounting the flea-bitten mongrel."

Chibi Ty Lee patted Fluffy on the head. "You're not flea-bitten."

"I was talking about Azula!" Chibi Tsubasa shouted. Chibi Azula shot her again. "Totally worth it!"

"Should Ty Lee really be leaning out of the saddle like that?" Chibi Sokka asked, staring at Chibi Ty Lee…and her butt, ostensibly because it was in the air.

"You think _Ty Lee_ is going to lose her balance?" Chibi Azula asked bemusedly. "The moon would sooner forget to rise." Then Chibi Ty Lee fell out of the saddle. "Damn it! Way to make me look stupid, Ty Lee!"

They landed, and picked a cartoonishly flattened Chibi Ty Lee off the ground. "Sorry, Azula."

Then they reached the North Pole. "Wow, that _was_ quick!" Chibi Katara said. "How fast are we going, again?"

"We're traveling at the speed of plot," Chibi Tsubasa said.

Fluffy landed in front of Chibi Arnook and Chibi Yue. "Hello," said Chibi Arnook. "I'm Chief Arnook, and this is my daughter, Princess Yue."

"Hi. I'm Sokka."

"Meet me at midnight, Sokka," said Chibi Yue, winking.

"Wow, Sokka," Chibi Katara said. "You're like a player or something."

"Pfft, please; you say that like it requires skill," Chibi Sokka said with scorn for all those players who thought their craft required skill.

"We're skipping this part of the story," Azula announced. "We're going to Saibei-Ria now."

Chibi Yue cried. "You're mean!"

"Yeah, yeah, go to your loveless marriage," Chibi Azula said.

"You're a bitch," Chibi Tsubasa said. "Let's be friends!"

"Heh. Saibei-Ria. I get it," Chibi Ty Lee said.

"Must you explain every joke in the story?" Chibi Katara demanded.

"Sorry."

"Wait," Chibi Sokka said. "Before we leave, I have to say something. Yue, the way you're treated here is totally bull. You deserve the right to choose your own husband. And vote. And work for an equal wage! Wow, when did I become a feminist?"

Chibi Sokka paused. "Wait a second: I'm a feminist, a player, the smart guy, _and_ the ditz. Do you realize what this means? _I'm S-Michael's author avatar! Anything I say goes!_ Ty Lee, make out with Tsubasa!"

"Not a chance, Ty Lee," said Chibi Tsubasa.

"This canal is now full of pudding!" Sokka shouted, jumping in. It was not, needless to say, filled with pudding.

"Sokka, you are _not_ S-Michael's author avatar," Chibi Katara said, squatting to face him. "_You're a canon character, remember?_"

"Oh, right. Let's go."

"Thanks for thinking I was actually going to make out with you, Tsubasa," Ty Lee said.

"Hey, I get a real lesbian vibe off of you; sorry."

"I hit on everything with a Y chromosome!"

"You've only hit on Sokka."

"He's the only man we met."

"Hahn, Arnook, Wakaun—"

"Only _real_ man."

Meanwhile, elsewhere, Chibi Hahn walked in on Chibi Wakaun doing an evil laugh. "I'm evil! Mwa-ha-ha-ha-ha!"

"Father! Chibi Sokka—"

"—hit on your girl? We skipped that part of the story, remember?" Chibi Wakaun said.

"No, worse! He filled her head with feminist propaganda! Now she says she's going to be working outside of the home, and she's demanding a pre-nup!"

"That _bastard!_ I'll write Dodo Head soon. In the mean time, however… _Mine is an evil laugh! Mwa-ha-ha-ha-ha!_

And so Chibi Sokka was kidnapped. The next morning, the gang found a note on Sokka's door.

"What does it say?" Chibi Azula asked.

"'Katara and Aang were on a beach. Then Zuko came and took Katara away. Zutara forever! The end," Chibi Katar said.

"This next one's a transcript entitled 'Rei: A New Kind of Princess,'" Chibi Ty Lee said.

"_Avert your eyes!_" Chibi Tsubasa said, using a whirlwind to destroy the unholy filth. They opened the door, and a whole pile of horrible fanfiction fell on them.

"These guys are going to _pay_ for this!" Chibi Katara swore. "Oh, and also for taking my brother, I guess."

"Let's go see my friend Mai," Chibi Azula said. "She was useful in canon." And so they found Chibi Mai. "Wow—traveling at the speed of plot is awfully convenient. Anyway, Mai, we need help."

The lights went out and came back on. "Never fear—Toph is here," Chibi Toph said. "I'll save Sokka. Wait, lets' save some time." The lights went out again, and when they came back on, Chibis Usani and Kasha were there.

"Oh my freaking God, Chibi Toph—it's like a pile of puppies and kittens were vomited up by a unicorn!"

"I wish people would stop saying that," Chibi Toph said. "Anyway, let's go save Sokka." The lights went out, and when they came back on, they were standing outside Glacier Plateau.

"Oh, now how'd you do _that?_" Chibi Mai demanded.

The guards spotted Chibi Toph. "Oh my God!" one of them shouted. "It's like a pile of puppies and kittens—"

"—were vomited up by a unicorn?" Chibi Toph asked.

"Uh, no, that's gross," the guard said. "I mean, aside from the whole issue of being covered in vomit that would mean that unicorns eat puppies and kittens. That image isn't cute at all!"

"…Just, let Sokka go."

"Only if you let us pinch your cheek."

"You know that Toph Fact, 'The only safe thing about Toph Bei-Fong is that she can't shoot lasers out of her eyes…yet'?" Chibi Toph asked.

"Yeah."

Chibi Toph shot lasers out of her eyes at the guard's feet. "You might want to run away."

"Oh my God, guys, I saw a lot of things in that cell! I spoke to Avatar Aang—it turns out you're not the Avatar after all, Katara—"

"Aw, dammit!"

"—and Tsubasa is some sort of airbender supremacist, and I saw this guy who lived hundreds of years ago who I think is going to be important somehow, and—"

Chibi Azula kissed him. "There, now will you just _shut up?_"

Sokka calculated. "The guy kept telling me that he wasn't a Gary Stu, in spite of being a thousand years old and still looking young and having a bunch of other powers never seen before in the Avatar world—"

Azula shut him up again. "Hope you enjoyed that, because next time, I'm using fire."

"Thus ends the first arch," Chibi Katara said. "Stay tuned for the second arch. What will happen? What_ is_ Ilmarinen, and how does he fit in to the story? Will we be able to figure out Zhou's plans before Sozin's Comet returns?"

"You already said he's the villain of the _final_ arch, so no," Chibi Kasha said.

"_Don't SPOIL it!_" Chibi Katara shouted, incensed.

"What? He also said that whatever happens during Sozin's Comet was only the first step in his plan. When was the last time you ever heard of the heroes thwarting _stage one_ of a villain's multistage plan? It _never_ happens."

"Besides, who's going to believe spoilers they read in the chibi parodies after Hakoda's whole by-no-I-mean-yes denial of you being the Avatar?" Chibi Azula pointed out.

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**AN:** You know, it just occurred to me after the fact that I'm being very evil. Sokka and Azula kiss at the end of chapter five. Well and good. Got to leave people wondering what happens next, after all. And then, chapter six ends in the same exact place. I really did need to go back and explored the things I missed during the last two chapters, you know. And then, this. It's, like, two chapters overdue, but what was I going to do, break up the story of Sokka's kidnapping right in the middle?

One way or the other, however, what that amounts to is that I've been leaving you hanging for three chapters (also, I wrote this the Sunday after publishing chapter 3). And since, if I keep to my schedule, I'll be posting chapter four on Monday (Aug. 30), chapter five on Wednesday (Sep. 1), chapter six on Friday (Sep.3), and this on Monday (Sep.5), that means that I'll have left you hanging for _a solid week!_ Wow.

Not that I intend to change my schedule, of course. After all, I could use this cushion if I, say, get writer's block sometime this week (last week for you). And it gives me a lot of time for last-minute changes. There's a reason I created the schedule in the first place, after all. See you on Wednesday!

**AN2:** Prophetic words; it turns out that I got writers' block not once but _twice_ over the last week! The first time cleared up when I took the time out to write _Loyalty: A Tale of the Dai Li_, and if I don't get anywhere soon, I'm going to write another oneshot, possibly about Iroh having an evil counterpart or else about Ozai drinking cactus juice.

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Now, then, Toph Facts that would never work in-universe:

1) When Toph is bored, she beats up her neighbors. Toph's neighbors are named Chuck Norris and Jack Bauer.

2) Jack Bauer can't do anything that's not manly, because the definition of "manly" is "doing what Jack Bauer does." Toph heard this, and forced Jack Bauer to wear a pink frilly dress to see if it was true. And it was.

3) Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer, so Toph makes him cry every day, because she wants to cure cancer.

4) The boogeyman checks his closet for Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris checks his closet for Jack Bauer. Jack Bauer checks his closet for Toph.

5) Toph and Amy Pond once had a "girls' night out" together. The next day, _Avatar_ and _Doctor Who_ were both canceled because every single monster and villain from both series were all dead.

6) Toph was once told she was the Chuch Norris of Avatar, and was deeply offended.

7) Toph knows when you reappropriate Chuck Norris or Jack Bauer Facts as Toph Facts, and she's going to be paying you a visit later. (Ironically, originally a Jack Bauer Fact.)


	10. Ch 7: Azula's Evil Plan, Date with Sokka

**AN:** Remember how I said I was a week ahead in that last one? Well, here I am publishing chapter 7, and I still haven't finished chapter 8 yet. So, yeah, the trace edge of worry is setting in.

The World without the War

S-Michael

Chapter 7:

In Which Azula Unveils an Evil Plan, and, Unrelatedly, Goes on a Date with Sokka

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Sokka kissed Azula. Azula froze for the slightest moment, then kissed back.

"Aw, isn't that sweet?" Toph teased.

"What were you saying about him not being your boyfriend?" Ty Lee asked.

They pulled apart, still holding on to each other, but with space between them. "That was…" Azula said eloquently.

"…Emotions running high," Sokka said. "Sorry."

"Oh. I see," Azula said a bit coldly.

"I'd like to do it again. In the future. Sometime. But, it's just…"

"…Too soon," Azula supplied.

"Yeah."

"Okay. But don't make me wait too long."

"I'll try not to."

"Are you two done having your melodrama yet? Because not all of these people are dead, and now that we've got what we came for, I'd prefer to be out of here before we end up killing anyone else," Katara said.

"Right, then. Who're our friends?"

Azula made the introductions. "Kasha with the Dai Li, Usani with the Earth Army, my friend Mai, and Usani and Mai's mutual friend, Toph Bei-Fong."

Sokka did a double take. "Toph Bei-Fong? Your solution to my being kidnapped was to go recruit _Toph Bei-Fong?_ Alongside a Dai Li? You are, just, awesome."

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"Perhaps you should get out of Saibei for a while. All of you," Usani said. "As I said, Kasha and I will take care of Dodo—I mean, Doro Kim." They nodded to the others, and walked into the darkness of one of Saibei City's alleys. And out of their lives.

"Well, this puts a crimp in our plans to find the Avatar," Azula said.

"Actually, no, it doesn't," Sokka said. "I had a vision in the cave. Apparently my toilet water came from an enchanted spring. Avatar Aang spoke to me. The Avatar is in some swamp somewhere. We need to bring her to the Fire Nation to solve some sort of problem. Also, there was something about a guy named Ilmarinen who bleeds fire and lava, and Tsubasa was banished for her Cloud Empire sympathies, but those things weren't connected to anything Aang was saying to me."

Glances at Tsubasa. "Oh, like I'd admit it even if it _was_ true," she said. "And, just for the sake of argument, if it was, it's not like a girl can't change in a couple years."

"A swamp. Great," Azula said. "Do you have any idea how many swamps there are in the Earth Kingdom?"

"There _are_ a lot of swamps in the Earth Kingdom," Toph chimed in, "but there's only one that I know has waterbenders in it. Tell them Toph sent you to deal with the poaching problem."

"See? A lead already," Sokka said. "Look, worst case scenario, I'm wrong, and, well, we'd have to lay low for a while if we stayed in the north, anyway. At least this gives us something to do. And if I'm right, we find the Avatar and save the Fire Nation from whatever unknown threat is going down that requires the Avatar's help."

"Alright, the pros outweigh the cons," Azula said. "Let's go. Mai, do you want to come along?"

"No, Azula," Mai said sarcastically, "I'm going to pass up the opportunity to actually do something interesting and return to civilization—and my _boyfriend_—so that I can hang out with a bunch of young boys and old men. All of whom are bald."

"Toph?"

"Sorry, Princess Pyro, I've got other responsibilities."

"Could you draw us a map, then?" Azula asked.

"Gee, _could_ I _draw_ you a _map?_" Toph mock-wondered.

"Oh, right," Azula said. "How about you give us directions, then?"

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Ty Lee insisted that it was better to travel at night. Personally, Sokka thought she'd just get bored out of her skull if she had to be conscious while riding the air bison for hour after endless hour. Fitting six sleeping bags and their occupants in Fluffy's saddle was a neat trick, but Sokka wasn't complaining. Of course, he might be singing a different tune if he wasn't the only male in the bunch.

The stars were bright, the moon was nearly full, and there wasn't a cloud in the sky. Sokka was awake, sitting with his elbows wrapped around his knees which were under his chin, and staring at Azula, who was sleeping. She was…cute. The adjective applied whether she was awake or asleep, only when she was asleep it meant something closer to "adorable," whereas when she was awake…he looked away.

_Admit it; you're developing feelings for her._ Oh, really? I'd never have guessed. Is that why I _kissed_ her? But Sokka's mental flippancy with himself didn't fool…well, himself. _That could be explained away by the highly charged emotional situation at the time, and you know it. Only it's not, or not entirely, and that's what you've got to face before you convince yourself otherwise. You LIKE her._ Even the mental voice trying to force Sokka to be brutally honest with himself about this shied away from using the _other_ "L" word.

Sokka sighed. It was true, he did like Azula…which made him feel like he was betraying Yue. _Honestly, Sokka, it's been less than a week, and you're already moving on to someone else._ It wasn't like that; there were mitigating circumstances. Still, from the outside, it looked…bad. And he wasn't comfortable with it on the inside, either.

It didn't make rational sense. He and Yue could never be, after all. He smirked at himself: _Of course, whoever said that humans were at their core rational was suffering from the most irrational delusion of all._

The romance with Yue had been a whirlwind. Love at first sight…well, okay, what he was feeling at _that_ point was probably a bit baser than love, but that's beside the point. Sokka had fallen, head over heels. It was said that you never loved like your first love, and now Sokka knew why; after your heart's been ripped out and trampled on (whether by the person you gave it to, or by fate taking that person away from you, or, in this case, by some stupid Northern Water Tribe tradition) you're slow to take that risk again.

Still, and all, he remembered what he'd felt in the cave when Azula came to rescue him (and Katara, and a bunch of other people, but that wasn't important just now). Maybe it had been elation at being rescued, relief at the fact that he was not, in fact, going to die. But one way or another, Sokka could remember the way he'd felt about her at the moment, vividly, and he leaned, back, closed his eyes, and savored that remembered glow. It had been the most intense feeling he'd ever felt in his life, he was pretty sure, and it had felt…good.

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They landed outside of a town. "Well, I've got business to take care of," Tsubasa said. "Have fun unsaddling the giant mattress with fleas." She flew off.

"What business could she possibly have?" Katara demanded as they began to unsaddle Fluffy.

Sokka shrugged. "Writing a letter to her mother? Do the Air Temples keep track of that sort of thing?"

"You're both missing the really big question," Azula said.

"Which is?" Katara probed.

"Why is she trying so hard to make us dislike her?" Azula answered.

"Maybe she just doesn't care," Mai suggested.

"Yeah," Katara added. "According to Sokka's dream, she has or had Cloud Empire sympathies, so maybe she's a racist?"

"No, she cares, and she'd deliberately antagonizing us," Azula shook her head. "It's not to make herself feel bigger, either, I don't think—and I'm really good at reading people, you know. No, it's like she wants us to dislike her because she doesn't want to risk _herself_ starting to like _us_."

"And that's what's worrying you, isn't it?" Sokka supplied.

Azula nodded. "I can only think of two reasons she could have for it. Either Katara's right, and she's just a racist…or she's prompting herself to betray us in some way."

"So what do we do?" Katara asked.

Azula grinned evilly. "We be as nice and decent to her as possible. Which doesn't mean we don't call her on her shit, of course. If we go out of our way to be nice to her, after all, that'll just make her suspicious. We invite her to join in our reindeer games, as it were. We need to do something fun, and try and get her to join us. We seduce her over to 'our side.'"

"I like this plan," Ty Lee said.

"You would," Mai said.

"I don't know if I'm up for that sort of thing so soon after Yue, and with my confusing feelings for you—"

"Not a literal seduction, Sokka," Azula said. "Whichever the case is, it ought to work if we do it right. I also intend to write to Mai's parents and see if they can't track down information on Tsubasa. Maybe, if it's something more than simple racism or 'bending bigotry, we can figure out what it is. And if it's not, at least there'll be one less bigot in the world. But that can wait until we've finished making camp, at least. In the mean time, let's flesh out our tactics…"

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"You didn't have to help me deliver the letter to the post office," Azula said. It was an obvious sort of thing to say, but Sokka had been walking with her in silence for a while, and she figured that he needed the prompt.

"Yeah, I know. It's just…see, the thing is…I, uh…"

"…wanted to talk to me in private?" Azula supplied.

"Yeah, that," Sokka said. "Yue wasn't all that long ago, and I'm not sure I'm ready to move on, and I'm not sure I should have started this by bringing up my last girlfriend but moving on," Sokka took a deep breath after having said this last part really fast, "but I really like you, Azula, and that's not going to go away, either, and it's really going to torture us so maybe we should really do something before we end up trying to kill each other, and wow, I really suck at this."

"Sokka, hold this," Azula handed him the letter.

"Okay, but why—?" Azula grabbed his face and kissed him, taking advantage of his open mouth to slip her tongue in. "That was cheating," Sokka whispered throatily.

Azula grinned. "Yeah, well, I _am_ an evil genius."

"That's so hot."

"In all seriousness, though, Sokka, you need to let it out. Let yourself feel this. I don't mean to trivialize what you had with Yue, but you have to take the guilt you feel and shove it aside. Tell me, can you honestly tell me that this—" she kissed him again "—feels wrong?"

"No."

"_Is_ it wrong?"

Nasal sigh. "No."

"There you go, then," Azula said. "The truth is, I wouldn't be nearly so understanding if I didn't feel just a bit guilty myself. If I'd made a move earlier, you wouldn't have been interested in Yue in the first place and we could have avoided all this melodrama. And actual drama, in the case of the whole kidnapping thing."

"No," Sokka said. "_This_ is not in any way your fault. That doesn't even make sense. Besides, I learned something from all of this."

"Which is?"

"I really, really, _really_ dislike the Northern Water Tribe."

Azula laughed. "After all of that, I think 'pathological hatred' would be excusable."

"Quite. But, the thing is…aw, never mind. Is there anything to do in this town other than make out in random streets?"

"Doesn't look like much. I saw a restaurant; why don't we get lunch?"

"Lunch. Not as romantic as dinner, perhaps, but the spirits only know where we'll be by the time _that_ comes around, so it'll do. It's a date." He kissed her.

"Aw, how sweet; you got over the ice queen," Tsubasa said. "And in record time, too."

Sokka and Azula jumped. "Didn't see you there, Tsu," Sokka said. "Where'd you come from?"

Tsubasa nodded at the post office. "Had a letter to send."

"Oh, right, I've got one, too," Azula said, a bit flustered. She took the letter from Sokka's hand, and jogged over to it.

"So…writing to your mother?" Sokka asked conversationally.

Suddenly, Tsubassa pinned Sokka against the wall, her forearm crushing his larynx. "How did you know that?"

"I—didn't—I—guessed," Sokka choked out.

"Oh," Tsubasa said bashfully, letting him go.

"Great _spirits_, woman, I was just trying to make conversation!" Sokka panted.

"Sorry," she said softly. "I'm going to…go." And she left.

Azula came back. "Anything interesting happen while I was in there?"

"Yeah, I asked Tsubasa if she was writing her mother, and she totally flipped out! She pinned me against the wall—"

"I didn't know she liked you like that."

"Ha, ha. Anyway, she was all, like, 'How did you know?' and I was all like 'I didn't, you crazy bitch; I was just trying to make conversation,' and she was all like, 'Oh, sorry.'"

"Fascinating," Azula said. "She actually said 'sorry'?"

"Yeah, I said it, didn't I?"

"Fascinating."

"So, what are you thinking?"

"That her mother is a sore point for her."

"Wow, Azula; your powers of deduction leave me in awe." Sokka's voice could've turned the swamp they were headed to into a desert.

"_Which_ makes me think that whatever Mai's parents will find will come in very useful, indeed."

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Feeling adventurous, Sokka and Azula decided to try a local pie called a _pizza_ that the locals insisted was a meal and not a dessert. The pie's crust was especially thick, the filling was a mixture of tomato sauces, cheese, various kinds of meat and veggies, and the selfsame mixture was also spread on _top_ of the pie, though it was more layered, with the sauce on the bottom and the cheese on the top. It was surprisingly good, though not at all sweet. Azula and Sokka attacked it with knives and forks.

"Eh, what's there to tell?" Sokka shrugged. "You know my sister, and you've met my Dad. Actually, you haven't met my Mom, now that I think about it. So, right, Mom: What can I tell you about Mom? Somehow I doubt that telling you how she used to tuck me in at night and kiss my forehead is going to impress you with my manliness. Oops."

Azula grinned. "You're bad at this, aren't you?" She stabbed a piece of the pizza-pie, cut off a bite-size portion, and ate it.

"Yeah, well, everyone's related to everyone else in my Podunk little village. If I wanted a girlfriend, I had to trek some ninety miles through the ice and snow to the next village. Not that I didn't want one, but…you know, ice. And snow. That's where my Mom was when you came to visit, though she wasn't looking for a girlfriend. Or a boyfriend! Wow, I _really_ suck at this and should stop talking now.

"So, what about your family?"

Azula sipped her juice. "Well, my uncle Iroh's the Firelord. My cousin Lu Ten's the crown prince. My father…is a prince, too. My mother's the granddaughter of Avatar Roku."

"Descended from the Avatar, eh? That's kind of neat," Sokka said.

Azula shrugged. "Considering how long the Avatar's been in the world, I think we'd be hard pressed to find someone who's _not_ descended from her.

"I also have an older brother, Zuko. You and he have a lot in common, I think."

"We do?"

"Yeah. You both have little sisters who are much better fighters than you."

"Oh, I'm wounded," Sokka said dryly. "I notice you seemed kind of reluctant to discuss your father." _And so I bring it up; smooth move, Sokka. Just…smooth!_

"He attempted to usurp the crown from Iroh and was banished," Azula said. She was playing with and looking at her food; Sokka got the feeling she wasn't really talking to him any more: "When I was younger I used to look up to him. Worship him. I was his favorite, you know. He said that this world existed for the strong, and that the weak had no right to exist in it, and I believed him.

"But now, I think that maybe…no, I _know_ he was wrong. But Sokka, he's still in here," she pointed at her temple. "Sokka, I'm—"

"Ruthless? Audacious? Ambitious? Capable of great cold-bloodedness? I know," Sokka said. "Azula, I saw you when you came to rescue me. I heard the story of it. So I know. No one who wasn't all of those things could have pulled it off.

"The second you knew I'd been kidnapped, you knew what you had to do, didn't you? And you didn't hesitate for one moment, did you? Someone who was less audacious and ambitious wouldn't have thought four teenage girls could take on these mysterious forces, especially when it turned out you had enemies in the Dai Li and the Northern Water Tribe as well as the entirety of the Glacier Plateau Raiders. Someone who wasn't as ruthless would have looked for some way to find the information other than cold-blooded torture. Either way, something in Doro Kim's plans would have gone wrong—they seemed to be that complicated—and I'd be dead.

"But that's not all there is to you, Azula. Maybe in some sort of bizarre hell-dimension where your father succeeded in becoming Firelord, he'd have been able to burn all the good out of you, I don't know—I don't believe it, but _maybe_—but he didn't do it _here_.

"Azula. I _saw_ you, in the cave. I saw the part of yourself that you keep locked inside. I saw the cold, pitiless darkness that resides in your soul, waiting to make your enemies pay for crossing you. And it made me love you even more. Not because I'm attracted to that sort of thing, of course, but because I realized how truly strong you must be to hold something like that in check.

"You _are_ a good person, Azula; don't forget it," Sokka finished. Then: "Wow, we can't even go out for a night on the town without some sort of melodrama popping up. Day, whatever."

Azula grinned. "You said you loved me," she teased.

"I suppose I did." He paused, thinking that you weren't supposed to do this sort of thing on a first date. _Fuck it; we've already established that I suck at this whole dating thing._ "I suppose I do."

Azula looked at him, pale and serious. She gulped, clearly not in her comfort zone. "I suppose I do, too."


	11. Ch 8: The Avatar is Run to Ground

**AN:** I don't do semi-phonetic spelling, on accounta weed _awl_ sound stoopped uzin' sem-Mai funehtik spellin', y'all. The sounds that letters claim to make are less like iron-bound rules and more like suggestions, or have you forgotten the anecdote about "fish" being spelled "ghoti" (the _gh_ from enou_gh_, the _o_ from w_o_men, and the _ti_ from na_ti_on)? You're going to have to imagine the swampbenders' accent.

The World without the War

S-Michael

Chapter 8:

In Which the Avatar is Run to Ground

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Fluffy swam through the swamp.

Tsubasa felt a mosquito bite her. She slapped it lazily, only to find the guts of a bug the size of her fist strewn across her right hand and left arm. "I am _so_ glad we came here, Sokka. Just, so glad. Can we hurry up and find the Avatar so that we can go?"

"Oh, right," said Sokka, "because I'm sure the Avatar is just going to drop in right in front of us and say—"

"Hi!" a girl said, hanging from the branch in front of them. Her face was two feet from Sokka's.

Sokka jumped. "It's her!"

"Hey, y'all. Y'all're trespassing on Tribal territory, so's my Pa and his friends're going to tie you up until we know you ain't spying for the Earth Kingdom." Suddenly, they were surrounded by swamp folk. They wore giant leaf hats, armbands, and wrappings around their shins and forearms; the men wore loincloths, while the women wore long skirts and bands around their torsos, and sported some sort of wooden breastplate on said band and their shin and forearm wrappings.

Azula stood on Fluffy's head. "We come in peace, searching for the Avatar."

"What's the Avatar?" the Avatar asked.

Explained Sokka: "The Avatar is an avatar of the Avatar Spirit, which is itself an avatar of the World Spirit, which is either the summation of all life in this world or an avatar thereof; I'm not really sure how that whole summation thing works, unless the World Spirit or whatever it's the avatar of is some sort of reverse-avatar—"

"Stop saying 'avatar'!" said the Avatar.

"The Avatar is a person who can bend all four elements," Azula said. "The Avatar spirit reincarnates, so there's only one. Sixteen years ago, the last Avatar, an airbender named Aang, died, and the spirit cycle goes air-water-earth-fire and boy-girl—"

"Except between fire and air, where it skips," Sokka chimed in.

"Yes, that. Anyway, that means that the next Avatar is a waterbender, a girl, and sixteen or under. And, well…"

"I saw you in a dream," Sokka said.

"Aw, aren't you as smooth as you are good-looking?" said the Avatar flirtatiously.

"Did you just call me ugly?" Sokka asked.

"'I saw you in a dream' is the oldest line in the book, Sokka," Mai said.

"Oh. No, I didn't mean it like that. I already have a girlfriend. Right, Azula?"

"Yes you do; a very dangerous one it would be wise not to cross."

"I saw you in a dream I had while being imprisoned by misogynistic psychopaths in a cell near a magic spring—don't ask—and Avatar Aang said you were the next Avatar, though I'm not sure how he could be there if you are here, unless he was some sort of spirit avatar of the Avatar—"

"You're doing it again," the Avatar said.

"The point is," summarized Azula, "we came to this foggy old swamp following Sokka's dream. He says you're the Avatar, which means you've got to go learn earthbending, firebending, and airbending to become a fully realized Avatar. But first, apparently, there's some problem in the Fire Nation that needs your help, and since Sokka's been right so far, I believe it."

A short fat man stood in his skiff. "So let me see if I've got this straight," he said: "You want to take my daughter around the world, unsupervised, to fight some unknown threat in some place I never heard of?"

"Sounds like fun," the tall skinny guy who was with him said.

"Shut up, Due."

"Alright, Tho."

"Well, when you put it that way, it does sound a little bit ridiculous," Sokka said.

Azula hadn't wanted to do this, but it was beginning to look like she had to. "Toph sent us your way. She said you had some sort of problem with poachers?" And now they were committed to deal with whatever problem Toph had promised to solve for these people, wasting their time, and when all was said and done, Toph would get the credit. Sigh.

"How do we know they ain't spies for the Earth Kingdom pretending to be friends of Toph's?" Due asked. "If only there were a way to test them, and see which side they is really on…"

"What, you mean, like, sending us to deal with the poachers?" Sokka asked.

"Ooh, we could do that, Tho! You is a smart one, aren't you, boy?"

"We'll get Huu to talk to them. He knows things, and hunting the poachers wouldn't prove they aren't spies, just that they want in more than they want to not piss that guy off. Besides, they have to do that, anyway," Tho said. "Well, since you're going to be dealing with that whole poacher problem for us, it'd be only hospitable for us to introduce ourselves and make y'all a meal at our camp. I'm Tho, this is Due, and that's my daughter, Amadahy."

"Call me Amy," Amadahy said.

"Azula, Sokka, Katara, Ty Lee, Mai, Tsubasa." Azula pointed by way of introduction.

"Due, go ahead to camp and warn them that we've got company," Tho said.

"Right, so we can hide them things we're making for Toph," Due said.

Tho rubbed his forehead. "Nice going, Due. Well, y'all better hope Huu likes you, because y'all are our prisoners until he says otherwise, thanks to _this_ idiot. Well, come on, I believe I promised you a meal. And a place to sleep, now. Well, go on, Due; get."

Amadahy twisted herself over her branch, somersaulted in the air, and landed in Fluffy's saddle. "Great, just what we needed," said Tsubasa. "Another Ty Lee."

"I'm beginning to develop a real aversion to being taken prisoner," Sokka said.

"They don't seem like they're going to bind or mistreat us, so we might as well make nice," Azula said. "If things go south, we can always break out later."

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When they arrived, the swamp folk were constructing temporary huts for them. "As long as you're making those things on such short notice, anyway, Sokka and I will need our own hut," Azula said. "We haven't had a moment's privacy in weeks."

"Why do we need our own hut?" Sokka asked.

"Sokka, you are the dumbest smart person I ever met," Azula said.

"Oh. Yeah, that was a bit thick, even for me," Sokka said. "Right, well, I've got to stop thinking about that before my body does something that embarrasses me, so, Tho, why don't you tell us about these poachers of yours?"

"Well, there's always been poachers, really. Some haughty-taughty Lord Finklebottom reckons that he'd really like a pair of catgator-skin boots, and suddenly we've got a couple dozen thugs wandering around our swamp with machetes and shit, generally making nuisances of themselves.

"We can deal with these lowlifes readily enough on our own lookout," Tho assured his guests and/or prisoners, "but things changed. The most recent Lord Finklebottom—I never bothered to figure out what his real name was—actually went catgator hunting with his thugs." Tho shrugged. "That happens, sometimes, as well. The lord wants to think himself a big bad hunter. Well, he didn't take being humiliated by a bunch of swamp folk very well, and so, right around the time of the eclipse, he put a bounty on our heads.

"Again, this isn't anything we haven't dealt with before," Tho continued.

"Are you going to get to the part you need us for soon?" Sokka asked.

"Yes, actually," Tho said.

Due chimed in: "One of them bounty hunters is actually…what's the word, Tho?"

"Competent."

"Right. He's a big old guy, evil-sounding voice, and he likes to throw fire at people."

"A firebender, eh?" Azula asked. "Well, that shouldn't be too hard. After all," she shot the bonfire, "I'm one of the best firebenders in the world."

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"So, this is going to work?" Sokka asked the next day, playing with a lei.

"The poachers attack the catgators, we come out of hiding and attack the poachers, and then the fire guy comes out of hiding and attacks us. That's been the pattern of it, so I don't reckon it's going to change now," Due said. A group of swampbenders attacked a group of seedy-looking Earth Kingdom men. (Looking seedy when compared to _swamp folk_ took special talent.)

"Of course, it's not likely going to happen the first time out," Azula said. "We'll probably be doing this all day, waiting for 'fire guy.'" A sudden blast of fire came out of nowhere, nearly incinerating a swampbender. They turned to face the threat. "Or not."

"Go ahead and run. The bounty says 'dead or alive.'"

"Wow, that _is_ an evil sounding dude," Sokka said.

"It couldn't be," Azula murmured to herself.

"What?" Sokka asked. Fire guy came into view. He seemed oddly familiar, though of course Sokka had never seen him before. So what—?

Azula jumped out of hiding and faced him, and even before she spoke, Sokka realized why the man seemed familiar; it was family resemblance. "This is what you've been doing since you've been banished, Father? Petty thuggery?"

"Bounty hunting, Azula," Prince Ozai said. "This isn't all I'm doing, but it pays the bills until I manage to usurp one of those Earth Kingdom city-states. And what are _you_ doing here."

"Uncle sent me to find the Avatar. Father, you can't be doing this! Banished or no, you're a _prince_ of the _Fire Nation!_"

"I am a bit overqualified for the job, yes, but the pay is good, I make my own hours, and the work is entertaining," Ozai said. "Or were you thinking of something else?"

"Damn straight I was, Father! We're the Fire Nation; we're _supposed_ to be the _good guys!_"

"How quaint. I see your uncle has had an effect on you. Truly sad, that."

"Get out of this swamp, Father, and never return. I am warning you," Azula said.

Ozai chuckled. "Do you know what my favorite part of being a bounty hunter is? Aside from getting my hands dirty for the first time in years? _No one tells me what to do!_"

A veritable wall of flame spread from Ozai's hands as they moved. Azula bent the fire away from her, but the shere awesome force of his 'bending was almost too much. Almost; things caught on fire (no small feat in this environment), but none of those things were Azula. The waterbenders and Tsubasa joined in.

A look came to Ozai's eye; he'd been spoiling for a real challenging fight for so long. He opened his mouth, "Well—" and got hit in the temple by a boomerang, knocking him cold.

"Sorry if this was something you needed to do on your own, Azula, but I generally frown on people shooting fire at my girlfriend and my sister. Especially, you know, at the same time," Sokka said.

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"Fluffy's sleeping," Ty Lee said.

"Wake the mattress monster up," Tsubasa said. "From now on, we travel by day and camp to _sleep_, not to explore the local Earth Kingdom markets or whatever. We were already crammed in there as tight as we could get, and we're adding a new member to the team."

A little ways away, Katara approached Azula. "Hey, you alright?"

"Yeah. It's just…for so long, I looked up to my father. He was the strongest man I knew, and taught me that that was all that mattered. And now, he got taken down by _Sokka_, of all people." Azula shook her head. "There's a moral in there, somewhere, about how no one is invincible, or how even a flea can get lucky once in a million years and hit a lion's weak point, or you can't be strong on all fronts, which is why you need people in your life you can trust, or some such garbage."

"Personally, I think it's just that there's no accounting for luck," Katara said.

Azula snorted. "Quite. Still, it does kind of support this whole 'My Father was Wrong' theory I've been working on.

"I mean, he always said that only the strong deserve to live, but think about it; sure, if you kill off the weakest members of a group, the _average_ strength of the group goes up, but the _absolute_ strength goes down. I mean, if nothing else, the weak members of an army can be the meat shields for the strong ones."

"Right. And _that's_ calculating from a totally sociopathic point of view," Katara said.

"Huh? Oh, right, yeah," Azula said. "I totally meant to say that. Also, still 'calculating from a totally sociopathic point of view,' there's still the fact that we don't live by strength of arms alone. Or strength of 'bending, for that matter. Surely, a ruler ought to surround herself with advisors who are, you know, smart, but what if the smartest person also happens to be weak enough to warrant being killed?

"I'm being over-literal with the definition of strength, perhaps, but that only raises a new question: who defines what 'strength' is? The ruler, I guess is the obvious choice, but since she's the one who decides who lives and dies, and at some point her staying in power will probably rely on having made the _right_ choice, wouldn't it be better to _not_ kill anybody? For one thing, it's better for morale, and you have a larger pool of conscripts, and who knows if one of those 'weaklings' might not surprise you and do something useful?"

Katara tilted her head, studying Azula. "You've spent more time thinking about this sort of thing than I ever want to, haven't you?"

"Years and years," Azula confirmed. She half-smirked. "So, think I'm crazy yet?"

"Howdy," said a man stepping out of the swamp. "Name's Huu, and I couldn't help but overhear. Mind if I add my two coppers?" He sat, assuming the lotus, and gestured for the girls to do the same. "Right, then.

"See, it's only natural that children believe the things their parents tell them. There are certain things you really don't need to find out in the school of hard knocks, such as the fact that a saber tooth moose lion is dangerous. Thing is, people believe a lot of weird things, and they pass these weird beliefs onto their children. You wouldn't _believe_ the things that people believe, in spite of all evidence to the contrary, on account of their parents said so! The fact that you've managed to reason your way away from the vicious worldview instilled in you by your father, well, that's not something everyone can do.

"Now, if you'll excuse me, I've got to go tell Tho that you can go, and take Amy with you."

Katara was taken aback. "Wait, how _long_ have you been listening?"

"Time is an illusion. But I've learned everything I need to about you."

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_Dear Mother:_

_I have used my voidbending to take a human life. Several human lives, in point of fact. We had to save Sokka—one of my companions on this detour—from a pack of slavers. Really, from what I hear, there isn't a group of people on Earth more worthy of death than those I helped killed, and what the __authorities__ do to them when they catch them is far, far more unpleasant than mere asphyxiation. Still, it makes me feel…ungood._

_It's the strangest, thing, but I wasn't hit with the realization of what I was doing—mass murder—until later. At the time, what I felt was the thrill of having the power to do this. I drew the lives out of these men with their breath, and as I did so, I felt their breath fill me, __energize__ me! It was better than I felt in the wildest drunken party in Omashu—don't ask—only instead of blunting my senses, it sharpened them. I saw the world with crystalline clarity._

_When I left, I saw the bodies of the men I killed. It wasn't until we reached the last one—the first one—that it suddenly hit me. I had taken human life. It, just…there are no words, Mother. I'd always thought that that whole song and dance about how taking a human life damages you spiritually was a bunch of bullshit, but it does, it really does. Why didn't you warn me about this, Mother?_

_But I didn't write you to tell you about my stomachaches. I wrote because there's been a change in plans. Sokka claims to have had a vision while he was in the cell. Avatar Aang told him where to find the next Avatar, and I believe him because he also seems to have discovered why I was banished. She won't be going to Omashu, though, Mother, we'll be heading into the Fire Nation to deal with some imagined crisis. I imagine we'll be visiting the Firelord soon, and you should be able to meet us there._

_The time for your revenge is nearing, Mother._

_Your daughter_

_Tsubasa_

Kazane read her daughter's letter. She tossed it in the fire, grabbed her glider, and jumped out the window. She headed towards the capital of the Fire Nation.


	12. Chibi Parody of Chapters 7 & 8

**AN:** Replying to some reviews:

Kiri: Actually, yes, or at any rate I prefer anon reviews with nothing to say to _no reviews at all!_ Yeah, yeah, an author's first responsibility is to himself and all that jazz, but it would be really nice to know I'm not yodeling in the dark (hint-hint, people who aren't reviewing).

Maggie (review of chapter 3): Hope you don't think I didn't like your Toph Fact. I just forgot to edit chapter 6 before I publish it, but I fully meant to add it to the list in chapter 6, and I'm either going to use it soon or go back and add it to that chapter retroactively. And I'd like to take _this_ opportunity to remind people that I'm still, in fact, looking for more Toph Facts, in spite of not having actually incorporated any into the story in a while.

Anyway, enough of this crap-on with the show...

The World without the War

S-Michael

Chibi Parody of:

Chapters 7 & 8

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"Well, our arch of the story is over," said Chibi Usani. "It's time for us to go."

"Good luck with…whatever, we're gone, so I don't care anymore," Chibi Azula said.

"Wait! I haven't had a chance to make a pass at Kasha yet," Chibi Ty Lee protested.

"We don't have time for your desperate attempts to convince us that you're straight, Ty Lee," Chibi Azula said. "We have to go. Now."

"I _am_ straight!"

"Whatever."

So they left.

"Ah, yes, nameless town. The perfect place to ditch you losers for a while," Chibi Tsubasa said. "Sayonara, suckers."

"Is it just me, or is she even bitchier than she was before?" Chibi Katara asked. "Hey, Azula, think of something evil we could do to her."

"We should be as nice to her as possible."

"Right, and then when she least expects it, we mob her."

"No, we just stick to the nice part."

"That's the worst evil plan ever," Chibi Katara complained.

"Hey I'm the master manipulator here, so just trust me, okay?" Chibi Azula said shortly. Then she reconsidered: "Wait, I'm assuming you'd rather have her turn into a nice person than turn into a babbling wreck in a nuthouse, yes?"

"I suppose that that's the good-aligned way to go, damn it," Chibi Katara said reluctantly.

"Then my plan A's definitely the way to go. Alright, now let's never speak of this again for at least two chapters."

"Well, I guess it's time to move on to our whole romance plot," Chibi Sokka said.

"Yeah. Damn it, how're we supposed to make fun of _that?_" Chibi Azula asked.

"I don't know, let's just do what S-Michael does when he gets stuck," Chibi Sokka said.

"Spend half a week worrying about it, waiting for inspiration while accomplishing nothing?" Chibi Azula asked.

"Actually, I meant muscle our way through and hope that no one notices how uninspired it was before reaching the next juicy bit."

"Oh. That works, too. I just hope he finishes this thing before he gets board and goes on hiatus for two more years; I don't want to become another _The First Generation_."

Chibi Katara broke in: "Hey, if you guys aren't going to do anything funny, we're going to have to skip over your date."

"We could just go make out in a random alley," Chibi Azula proposed.

"Done," Chibi Sokka said, and he and Chibi Azula disappeared offscreen.

"That's not actually funny!" Chibi Katara protested.

"We don't care!" came Sokka's voice.

Then Chibi Tsubasa stumbled across them. "Oh, hi," said Chibi Azula. "We were just…_not_ making out in a random alley. I've got to go leave the two of you unsupervised, now. No fooling around; Sokka's my property." She pointed to a hickey on his neck. "See? I marked my territory."

"That's weird; she hasn't let me out of earshot since she first laid eyes on me up until now. I wonder if she's feeling well?" Chibi Sokka wondered.

"No matter; it means I can pin you against the wall and do whatever I want to you."

"Nah, we already made that joke in the story proper. So, wanna talk about your mother?"

"Ah, damn it! Not the first part, that wouldn't have stopped me, but why'd you have to go and bring up my mother? _No one_ can get frisky immediately after talking about their mother. Well, except for you, in canon. Come to think of it, Katara was awfully touchy-feely with Zuko in that cave under Ba Sing Se after comparing 'dead mom' stories…wow, you come from a family of inbred freaks, don't you?"

"_Don't say that so loud!_" Chibi Sokka hissed. "The Kacest shippers might hear you!"

"Well, since we're so gleefully breaking the Fourth Wall, I'm going to go read some Zukka slashfics," Chibi Tsubasa said, getting on her glider and flying away.

"So anything interesting happen?" Chibi Azula asked.

"No, absolutely nothing happened that would give the Kacest shippers any ideas at all," Chibi Sokka said.

Chibi Azula blinked. "Sokka? That sounded very, _very_ bad."

Suddenly, the scene shifted, and they were riding Fluffy in the Foggy Swamp.

"Hey, what happened to our date?" Chibi Azula demanded.

"You were taking too long," Katara said. "Now it is assumed that this is a few weeks later, and that you two have been dating this whole time. Let's find the Avatar."

Chibi Amadahy jumped into Fluffy's saddle. "Hi. I'm the Avatar, and I'm here because this boy tripped my SexyRadar."

"Well, that's convenient," Chibi Tsubasa said. "Let's go meet my mother—I mean, go to the Fire Nation. Yep. Because my mother is totally not seeking revenge on the Avatar, nor am I helping her with said revenge."

"No, we can't go not meet your non-revenge-seeking mother yet, we've still got to go face my father," Chibi Azula said.

"Ah, screw it, S-Michael phoned that whole part of the story in," Tsubasa said.

"Hey! It's very important to my character development that I realize that even a man as powerful as my father can be brought down by something as mundane as a freak boomerang accident," Chibi Azula said.

"Yeah. And he phoned it in."

"I find that I have to question S-Michael's sanity," Chibi Katara said. "I mean, think about it: Ozai gets downgraded to random mook, and _Zhou_ gets upgraded to Big Bad? _Zhou?_"

"Hey, give the man credit; he destroyed the freaking moon," Chibi Amadahy said. "Besides, S-Michael used up his monthly 'fight-scene-awesomeness quota' in _Betrayal_."

"Well, before we move on, Sokka and I are going to need our own private shack. We're going to travel by day now, on account of I don't even trust Katara with him any more on account of that whole Kacest comment Sokka made in the last scene."

"Kacest comment?" Chibi Katara asked.

"Hey, Tsubasa started it!"

The next day, Chibi Sokka was playing with a leu.

"Where'd you get that lei?" Chibi Katara demanded.

"Leu. The singular of lei is leu."

"Where. Did. You. Get. It?"

"Oh, nowhere. It just symbolizes the fact that I got lei'd."

"Yes, and thanks for explaining that for the two people out there who didn't get it while watching the canon," Chibi Mai said.

They jumped.

"What?" Chibi Mai demanded.

"Oh, it's just that you haven't said anything for a couple chapters, and I forgot you were with us," Chibi Katara said.

"Hmm. I'm going to go write in my diary and cut myself."

"Oh, highbrow, S-Michael," Chibi Sokka said. "You really want to contribute to that particular bit of fanon? And to think, I wanted to be your author avatar."

Later that night, Chibis Azula and Katara were talking about how messed up Chibi Azula's family was when Chibi Huu came out of the woods.

"The fact that you've managed to reason your way away from the vicious worldview instilled in you by your father, well, that's not something everyone can do. You wouldn't _believe_ the things that people believe, in spite of all evidence to the contrary, on account of their parents said so! For example, every religion in the world to have ever existed. Ever."

Chibi Azula looked at Chibi Katara. "Huu channeling Richard Dawkins? Okay, maybe there's something to this whole 'S-Michael doesn't know what he's doing' theory, after all."


	13. Ch 9: Going to the Fire Nation

**AN:** Yeah, I have exactly zero cushion this time (read: I haven't even _started_ Chapter 10 yet), so…yikes. I've managed to publish regularly up to this point (every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday), but I might miss Friday's scheduled update. I'll try not to, but if I do, I'm giving you fair warning.

The World without the War

S-Michael

Chapter 9:

In Which We Go to the Fire Nation

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Kazane bowed. "It is a pleasure to meet you, Firelord Iroh."

"An emissary from the Western Air Temple? Anything less would be an insult," Iroh said. "And a pity, in the case of an emissary as lovely as you." And yet he didn't turn off the audience chamber's pyrotechnics.

"Oh, you," Kazane blushed. _You are barking up the wrong tree, you fat old man._

He asked about her reason for visiting, and she spouted some platitudinal nonsense, to which he replied in kind. The real communication was in the face: his eyes made the beginning-quarter of a roll, and she smiled slightly apologetically. The message was clear: Q: _Oh, so it's going to be one of THESE kinds of affairs, is it?_ A: _Yeah, sorry._ Ninety percent of diplomacy was talking just to hear yourself talk. It was a necessary evil; when highly emotionally charged situations occurred, the forms established and practiced might be the only thing keeping a bad situation from becoming worse.

"Well, I'm sure we can deal with official business later," Iroh said, obscenely relieved to be able to say that (for which Kazane did not blame him at all). "I would like you to meet my nephew, Prince Zuko." He gestured at a servant, who bowed out and returned a minute later with—

_Hel-_lo! _This is more to my liking, entirely._ The boy had flawless skin, and hair she was certain would look absolutely splendid freed from its ponytail and spread on a pillow.

"You wished to see me, Uncle?" Zuko bowed politely. Kazane found herself fervently wishing she knew exactly how old the young prince was.

"Prince Zuko, I would like you to meet our guest, Sister Kazane of the Western Air Temple. Sister Kazane, Prince Zuko."

"Charmed," Zuko said.

Kazane decided that it didn't matter how old he was, given that she may well be the most wanted person in the entire world in a couple days. She might as well enjoy the perks of criminality while she could, right? "Likewise," she purred, careful not to bow; non-airbenders tended to be a bit weirded out when it came to the shaved foreheads, so she didn't want to bring it any more to Zuko's attention than necessary (really, aesthetically speaking, it would have been better to either shave the entire head or not shave at all—she was convinced that she looked like she was balding—but, alas, that wasn't what _tradition_ called for). "I'm afraid I'm feeling a bit tired. Could you show me to my room, Prince Zuko?"

A servant whispered in his ear; Zuko nodded: "I'm informed we have a room waiting for you. If you'll accompany me?"

"Gladly." They left the Firelord's audience chamber. "So, Prince Zuko, do you have a girlfriend?"

"Yes. Her name's Mai."

_Ah, hell._ "Mai. How lovely. Is she beautiful?" Come to think of it, that name sounded familiar from somewhere…

"_I_ think so," Zuko said a bit touchily.

Kazane remembered: her daughter wrote of a gloomy, pale girl who liked to throw knives. But could a creature like that actually bag a truly fine piece of ass like the one before her? "Where is this Mai?"

"She's traveling with my sister, Princess Azula."

Oh, so it was her. And from the way he got defensive about something that resembled something that could have been a veiled insult from someone who actually knew the girl, Kazane knew that this wasn't going to be easy; she could already tell the boy was devoted to Mai. _I'm not usually the kind to give up without a fight—especially to a teenage girl—but even if I _could_ seduce him, it would take more time than I'm likely to have here, and besides, I wouldn't want to create problems for Tsubasa before we make our move. Consider yourself safe, Mai._

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Having grown up without lore of the Avatar, Amadahy asked some pretty basic questions. Some of which were embarrassing, because the others didn't have the answers to them. "How did the Avatar start?"

Katara shrugged. "The Avatar has been around since before the dawn of history, several thousand years ago. There are legends of the Avatar fighting the Four Beasts of the Elements."

"And what's that?"

"According to legend, there were once four immortal beasts, one for each element (hence the name)," Katara said. "Ziz, the air beast, Leviathan, the water beast, Behemoth, the earth beast, and Phoenix, the fire beast. They used to travel the world, destroying anything that caught their fancy—which included anything which involved humans building anything."

"What happened to them?"

"I don't know. Presumably the Avatar defeated them. It's just a stupid legend, anyway."

"Okay. So if no one was around when the Avatar was created, how do you know what the purpose of the Avatar is?" Amadahy asked.

"Because the Avatar has always worked to maintain order in the world," Katara said.

"If the Avatar maintains order, why is there war in this world?"

"The Avatar is very powerful, yes, but she is neither omnipotent nor omnipresent. She can't be everywhere at all times to solve everyone's problems. She's also not omniscient—even the Avatar can just plain and simply screw up. And sometimes the Avatar fails. Also, there was at least one incident on the tip of my mind where the Avatar deliberately let the two sides duke it out because she (or was it a 'he'?) figured that that would cause less death and destruction than if she took out both armies."

"What about the Empire of Clouds?" Amadahy asked. "From everything I've heard about it, it was one giant pile of evil. Why'd the Avatar allow _that_ to exist for so long?"

"Well, I guess that that's another example of how the Avatar isn't omniscient," Katara said.

"How long did the Empire of Clouds exist for, again?"

"About four hundred and fifty years."

"That's a very long time for my predecessors to have been oblivious," Amadahy pointed out.

"Yeah, well, it was a different time, Amy. Look," Katara said exasperatedly, "I don't have all the answers, okay? History's not my best subject, and even if it was, my history book only deals with the last nine hundred years or so."

Amadahy asked a question that was very much non-historical: "Tsubasa doesn't like me much, does she? Why?"

"Oh, so you picked up on that, did you? Tsubasa doesn't like anybody."

"The Avatar has amazing powers of detection. It probably goes hand-in-hand with being the bridge to the spirit world or whatever it was that I'm supposed to do. I know that she doesn't like anybody, but her feelings for me are particularly wiggy."

Katara shrugged. "Damfino. The innermost workings of Tsubasa's mind are a mystery to me."

_Of course, we never _did_ implement that plan of Azula's did we?_ It was really too bad that the two people capable of masterminding it decided to fall madly in love with each other the same day that the plan had been hatched. They'd started running off together as soon as Fluffy was all squared away, and rarely returning before absolutely necessary. Considering how much time they were spending together, it was actually surprising that it took until that night in the foggy old swamp for them to consummate their relationship.

Ah, well. The idea that Tsubasa was actually working against them was weak, anyhow. Either a little "healthy" paranoia on Azula's part, or else she was just looking for a way to keep tempers from blowing on a long trip by turning a potential source of trouble into an elaborate game of cloak and dagger. Tsubasa was just a 'bending bigot, and as nice as it would be to make her see the light, one bigot more or less wouldn't matter all that much in the grand scheme of things, so when everything was said and done, she was glad her brother and her best friend could have a little privacy. After all, they'd earned it.

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Azula and Sokka had found that strange phenomenon of pizza again, or sort of. Here in sunshine, it wasn't a pie; they took the innards of the pizza pie and wrapped it in a tortilla, making something they could eat as they walked, exploring the city. The State of Sunshine was a strange place; part Fire Nation, part Earth Kingdom. It paid the proper tributes to the Earth King, behaving like a proper little vassal state, but all the while, it was flirtatiously batting its eyes at the Fire Nation.

It didn't want to be part of the Fire Nation, not by a long shot, but it knew that keeping close economical ties to an entity several times as rich as the Central State of Ba Sing Se that it was a stone's throw from could only be of benefit. Even before Firelord Sozin was born, the two counties and one barony that were the precursors to the modern Sunshine had been currying Fire Nation custom—as had several surrounding Earth Kingdom fifes. And then came Sozin's brief, abortive campaign into the Earth Kingdom.

For a time, the surrounding fifes looked at the Fire Nation cautiously, wondering if Sunshine wasn't a precursor to the fate that would eventually befall them. The Avatar made quick work of whatever ambitions the Firelord had, and while that quelled the most alarmist of fears, it was many years until the Fire Nation was really trusted in those parts of the Earth Kingdom nearest it.

Sunshine was severed from the Fire Nation and shackled to the Earth Kingdom. Feelings were mixed amongst the colonists and natives (though no prizes would have been awarded for guessing which group would have preferred to have been part of which nation). The governor Sozin had appointed, a cousin of his, became a hereditary head of state in his own right (a concession on the part of Roku's many had protested at the time). Some of the natives and neighbors didn't like this, but so long as Sunshine paid the proper tributes and lip service to the Earth King and didn't make trouble for its neighbors, Ba Sing Se couldn't really care less what it did or who ruled it.

Having a ruler with such close blood ties to the Fire Nation, and indeed who in the first couple of generations actually thought of themselves as being Fire Nation, meant that the elite in Sunshine copied Fire Nation styles, and this trend filtered down to the masses. This much was hardly amazing. What _was_ amazing was that for all the original governor seemingly pined to be Fire Nation, he never forgot that he ruled an Earth Kingdom fife and that most of the people he ruled were natives, and took steps to integrate the colonists with the natives, eliminating what could have been a powerful source of tension.

All that was long ago, though. These days the ruler of Sunshine not only acknowledged their status as Earth Kingdom vassals, but embraced it with patriotic fervor. Which didn't change the fact that a member of the royal family was more likely to be a firebender than an earthbender, or that Sunshine had become a very Fire Nation-y place.

It protested (in the original sense of the word) its vassal nature, used Earth Kingdom money, and, as stated, paid the proper tributes to Ba Sing Se. But the tributes demanded by Ba Sing Se were never so much of a much, existing more to prove Ba Sing Se's domination than for its value as revenue, and lip service to the Earth King was even less expensive. And while officially Earth Kingdom money (minted in Ba Sing Se) was the official currency of Sunshine, one would have a hard time finding a single provider of a good or a service who _wouldn't_ take Fire Nation currency.

There were more Fire Nation-style buildings than Earth Kingdom-style buildings, about as many people wearing red as green (a few wore both, but that particular color combination was…jarring), and even a Fire Navy ship or two in port, the crews having a little shore leave after several days hunting pirates. Sunshine, in short, was a very metropolitan place.

The sun was setting in Sunshine, and Azula and Sokka walked along the harbor, hand in hand, watching it. They had the sun on the water to one side, and the sun on the city to the other. The sun broke against the ocean, turning red and spewing a million colors into the nearby clouds. The clouds were purple and pink and the sky was orange, though it faded to navy in the east. It was already night in the rest of the Earth Kingdom, and it wasn't quite sunset yet in the Fire Nation.

"Azula? I'm a bit concerned."

"Yeah, I know we haven't gotten around to my plan for Tsubasa yet, and yes, we really should have gotten on that ASAP, _and yes_, I admit that the only reason we haven't is that I wanted to spend as much time with my boyfriend as possible, but I'm sure we'll be able to do it in the Fire Nation, maybe even in pursuit of whatever threat this is in the Fire Nation."

"Not that, though we should totally talk about that later," Sokka said. "We're going to meet your family soon. What are you going to tell them?"

"About what?"

"About _me_."

"The truth. What else?" Azula seemed baffled by the question.

"And you're not worried about their approving of me?"

Azula blinked slowly, and then realization visibly struck—and she burst out laughing.

"I take it that's a 'no,'" Sokka said dryly.

"Firstly, Sokka, this is the _Fire Nation_ we're talking about, not the barbarous Northern Water Tribe. We're not in the practice of practicing arranged marriage. I'm free to date whomever I want. And secondly," she grinned, "even if everyone disapproved, do you _really_ think that that would stop _me?_"

Sokka chuckled. "Yeah, I doubt that much could stop you short of a fully realized Avatar, or maybe an army. Or Toph Bei-Fong."

"Pfft; I could take her."

"You know, I really believe you could," Sokka said. "I'm dating the most badass person on the planet; awesome."

"Good thing you realized that, too; I'm attracted to people who are in worshipful awe of me," Azula teased.

"Wouldn't want to disappoint you, my princess," Sokka said. Azula laughed. "You know, Azula, and even I realize how totally corny this is going to sound, but—and did I mention that this is going to be corny? Because it's going to be seriously, seriously corny—"

"Just get on with whatever clichéd thing you're going to say already so we can get on with our lives."

"Okay: I could stare at your smile all day. Ugh; I want to punch myself a little for actually having said something so…_that_, but here's the thing; it's the spirits' honest truth. I could. All day."

"Oh, Sokka…" she faced him, holding hands and staring into his eyes, eyes twinkling, "that really _was_ corny." Sokka gave an ironic little bow by way of reply. "But thanks," she added.

Sokka gazed out at the water; the sun was almost gone. The next words had to be forced out: "We really ought to be getting back soon."

"Yeah. Need to claim our room if we expect to have any privacy tonight."

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They rode hard and long the next day, but by the time that evening came, they were approaching the royal palace. The Water Tribesfolk were awed by the sight of the palace atop its mountain as the sun set behind it. (Tsubasa seemed underwhelmed.) Fluffy landed in a spacious palatial courtyard, where a party was waiting for them.

"Welcome home, Niece," Firelord Iroh said warmly.

"Great to be home, Uncle," Azula said, jumping from Fluffy's saddle. She turned to her brother. "Prince Zuko," she said formally.

"Princess Azula," he responded in kind. Then they broke into grins, and hugged. "Welcome home, sis."

"Thanks, Zuzu." They broke the embrace. Azula was amused to notice that Katara was keeping her tongue firmly in her mouth with a visible effort (but then, lots of things about people were visible to Azula) "This is my friend Katara, and Tsubasa. I'm sure you remember Mai, Zuzu."

"The name does ring a bell, yes," Zuko said dryly. He then grabbed Mai and kissed her.

Tsubasa's mouth was hanging open. "Holy crap, Mai, how the hell did you bag yourself a piece of ass like that? It certainly wasn't your sparkling personality."

"Tsubasa has this problem, where she says unfortunate things if her mouth opens and words come out," Azula explained. "Anyway, this is Sokka, Katara's brother. He is…Sokka. Oh, and this is Amadahy, of a lost swamp tribe of waterbenders. She's the Avatar."

"You actually found the Avatar?" Iroh asked. "I must admit, I'm rather impressed." He chuckled. "That's something of an understatement, actually. Though I wonder why you brought her here instead of to King Bumi?"

"It's too long a story for this late at night, but, apparently, there's some sort of problem brewing in the Fire Nation. Know any problems that could warrant Avatar-intervention?"

"Yes, actually. Commander Zhou seems to have the situation under control, but the input of the Avatar is something I'd always be grateful for." Iroh looked at the girl, Amadahy, searching for some echo of his old friend and mentor, Aang. He shrugged it off; there'd be time for that later. "Let's get you dinner before you head off to bed."

"Yes, that would be nice, Uncle," Azula said. "Have the servants prepare rooms for Tsubasa, Amy, and Katara."

"And Sokka?"

She grinned at the boy, "he won't be needing one."

Iroh raised an eyebrow, then shrugged. "I'm your uncle, not your father. I'll leave it to Ursa and Lu Ten to have kittens over your relationships."

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Tsubasa tried the door to Amadahy's room. Locked. She knelt, and looked at the lock. She found this particular technique…embarrassing. It was the line from a Cloud Empire-era play: _You can pick a lock with your tongue? You must be a hit with the ladies._ She wasn't _really_ using her tongue, of course, but…

Tsubasa pressed her mouth to the keyhole, and blew. The tumblers shifted, the cylinder turned, and the door unlocked. She opened the door, and found Amadahy asleep at a desk, reading documents the Firelord had given her about Kai's Pendant. Well, at least this meant she was fully clothed. Tsubasa tied her up with bed sheets.

"Hey, wha—?" Amadahy's question was cut off when Tsubassa 'bent the air from her lungs.


	14. Ch 10: The Avatar Kidnapped!

**AN:** I don't mean to insult anyone or call anyone an idiot, but I've gotten, like, six reviews commenting on how Azula is slightly OOC. Well, this _is_ an AU—what do you expect? It would be seriously messed up if I tried to get these people to act exactly the same as they did in canon after leading completely different lives, you know. Quite frankly, in the beginning I was more worried that Azula's character was _too close_ to canon than anything else (I justified that by having Ozai be canon-like a jerkass, though how I can justify _that_ when Azulon presumably gave his son a lot more love and attention with all that time he was spending _not_ fighting wars is another question entirely).

The only person I wanted to keep in character was Ty Lee, given that this world, in spite of the darker and edgier nature of this fic, sucks considerably less than the world from canon does. And she's also the character I have the worst grasp of; ah, well.

**AN2:** Well, I made it, writing some 3300 words in two days, and all I had to do was cut out all television, books, and most internet time. Yay, me. Anyway, if my calculations are correct, this puts me over the 40k mark.

The World without the War

S-Michael

Chapter 10:

In Which the Avatar is Kidnapped

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Azula and her friends went to bed, and Iroh glanced at Zuko. He suppressed a chuckle; the boy looked as if someone were feeding coal into a fire lit directly under his chair. Clearly, he wanted to leave and be with his girlfriend. _And whatever happens after that is none of my business, really._ "So, Zuko, what do you think?"

"It seems to me that your 'evil master plan' worked better than we could ever have hoped," Zuko said. Iroh's "evil master plan" had been about as far from evil—or much of a plan, really—as one could get.

After Prince Ozai had been banished, Zuko had recovered from his influence quite well to turn into a fine young man. Azula, on the other hand…well, Ozai's poison had stained deeper into her. Eventually, the sixteenth anniversary of Avatar Aang's death came, and with it a flimsy excuse to send Azula on a mission to travel from one end of the world to the other (literally). Hopefully, with just a little exposure to the world outside the Fire Nation (and Sunshine, same difference), she could see for herself how truly full of shit her father was.

"She seems…happy," Zuko said. He momentarily forgot his agitation to leave, and smiled warmly at the thought. "Heh. Who'd have thought it?"

"Those Southern Water Tribe kids have been a good influence on her," Iroh said. Then he chuckled. "Of course, facing her father down in that swamp probably helped. What were the odds of that?" In spite of what Azula had said, they had had time to relay the tale of their travels while waiting for dinner and then over dinner.

"They say strange things happen in the mist of destiny when the Avatar is near," Zuko said. "Look, Uncle…uh…?"

"Yes, you can go. Tell Mai I said goodnight." And Zuko was off.

Iroh chuckled at his now-absent nephew's expense, and sipped his tea. Ah, to be young. The Firelord missed it. Of course, there were advantages to age, as well. He thought back on the events of this night. Azula was…radiant. Happy, yes, but more than that; _healthy._ He savored his tea at the same time as he savored this recent memory. _It is moments like this that make this whole old age thing worthwhile._ Tonight was a good night; tonight was a very good night, indeed.

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It was a very good morning, Zuko thought, gazing lovingly at Mai. "Hey, there, beautiful."

"You have a strange definition of 'beauty,'" Mai said.

"Oh, hush; you're just being gloomy and depressed because, well, you're always gloomy and depressed," Zuko teased.

"Ty Lee's prettier than I am."

"Pfft. Ty Lee's prettier than everyone, so that doesn't count." Zuko thought he saw Mai chuckle, once, silently.

"What about that water tribe girl?"

"Yeah, she's pretty, too. Which water tribe girl are we talking about, again?"

"And Tsubasa?"

"Eh, I _do_ like how she hates everything. It reminds me of someone I know, but I can't quite put my finger on it…ah, well, must not be important."

They were silent for a moment. "You know, Zuko, you'd best never leave me. Where else am I going to find someone who gets my sense of humor?"

"Wouldn't dream of it. After all, I've only got eyes for you."

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It was a very good morning, Azula thought.

"So, time to unveil your evil plan for Tsubasa yet?" Sokka asked.

"It's definitely got to be soon; I don't like how…antsy she was last night."

Sokka hadn't noticed anything out of the ordinary, but then, he'd gotten use to Azula's nigh-preternatural ability to read people. "Also, we've got a solid week before we have to ship out to see this Commander Zhou, so our wild hormones are no excuse." This last part would have been more convincing if he wasn't kissing the hollow of her neck as he said it.

"Bah! You devious Water Tribe peasant! You're using your masculine charms to distract me while I'm trying to use my big Fire Nation brain for thinking!"

"What? I can't have you thinking—you might figure out that I'm actually just a gold digger, and then the gig would be up."

"Aha! You admitted it! See what I managed to get you to confess by using my giant brain."

"Uh-huh, brain, right. Because that's the part of your anatomy I'm staring at right now." Azula laughed. "Ooh, that looked pretty. Do it again."

"Oh, you're going to pay for that."

"Goodie."

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Sokka and Azula left Azula's room at precisely the same time Mai and Zuko left Zuko's room. And the former was right across the hall from the latter, so they nearly physically bumped into each other, and none of them looked particularly un-disheveled. "Oh, hi, Zuko. Mai," Azula said awkwardly.

"Hey, Azula. Sokka." Zuko was equally awkward.

"We were just going to check my mail," Azula said.

"Sounds nice. We were going to get a fruit tart," Zuko said.

"Sounds nice," Azula said. They walked down the hall.

"So, Zuko, you aware of the political situation in the Earth Kingdom?" Sokka asked.

"Generally," Zuko admitted.

"So does that mean you've heard of Toph Bei-Fong?"

"Yes, actually. Our foreign intelligence is really top-notch in the Fire Nation."

"Ah. So you'd be aware of the phenomenon of 'Toph Bei-Fong Facts,' then?"

"Haven't you given those up _yet?_" Mai asked.

"Fond of them, is he?" Zuko asked.

"Oh, so you _are_ aware of Facts like: 'Sozin's Comet isn't going to return. It's too scared of Toph Bei-Fong.'"

"Actually, if our intelligence is correct, she's probably counting on Sozin's Comet," Zuko said.

They split up. "Your brother needs his sense of humor checked," Sokka said.

"Oh, he was just trying to shut you up," Azula said. They went to the palace's mail room and found Azula's locker. "Well, it looks like Mai's parents got back to me. Let's go see what they found." They took the package and walked to the library.

On the way, they ran into Ty Lee. "Hey, have you seen Amy?" Ty Lee asked. "I wanted to show her something."

"Nope," Azula said. "We'll tell her you want her if we see her."

"Okay."

Azula and Sokka found a table, and began reading. "Oh, spirits," Azula said ten minutes later. "This is bad."

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_Amadahy was in the swamp, and a bald old guy with airbender tattoos stood in front of her. "Am I dead?"_

"_Why does everyone ask me that? No. Tsubasa knocked you out so that you couldn't escape."_

"_Escape how? Waterbend with only my face?"_

"_Something like that. I could earthbend with only my face; it's something Bumi and I learned to do together."_

"_Who are you?"_

"_About time you got around to asking: I am Avatar Aang."_

"_So you're the one who told Sokka how to find me. Thanks for that, by the way."_

"_Hey, the world needs the Avatar," Aang said._

"_I've seen no proof yet that I even am the Avatar," Amadahy protested._

"_Oh, you will," Aang assured her. "For now, though, there's something I need to tell you."_

"_Alright, so long as you don't disappear right afterwards, because I've got some questions."_

"_Fair enough. You remember those documents that the Firelord had you study?"_

"_How can I forget? I'm pretty sure I've got Kai's Pendant etched onto my brain."_

"_It's fiction."_

"_What? I'll _kill_ him!"_

"_It's not the Firelord's fault. He doesn't know. Every document referring to Kai's Pendant has been forged and put in the Royal Library over the course of the last decade by Zhou. There is no such object as Kai's Pendant, and there was no such person as Kai."_

"_Why?" Amadahy asked._

"_I don't know. All I know is that it appears that, for some reason, Zhou wants the most powerful firebenders in the Fire Nation to be at a certain location on the day of Sozin's Comet. Considering that he was willing to unleash a horde of evil spirits on his countrymen to aide in the subterfuge, I think it's safe to assume that he doesn't suffer form an excess of morals, and therefore that whatever he's planning might not be in the best interests of anyone other than him."_

"_Understatement of the year."_

"_Yeah, probably."_

"_Anyway, before I can deal with this little Zhou problem of yours, I'm a bit tied up at the moment. So, got any insight on why Tsubasa hates my guts, or how to get out of here?"_

"_Yes, actually, I do. I have answers to both of your questions, actually, and I'm not too proud of the first one…"_

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Azula coordinated a search of the entire royal palace, even the subterranean eclipse bunker, and found no trace of either Tsubasa or Amadahy. "Damn it, I should have acted sooner," Azula said.

"There's no way you could have known," Sokka comforted.

"That's _why_ I should have acted sooner! I thought Tsu's hostility towards Amy was just resentment of the way the Avatar has systematically cracked down on dominators for the last nine hundred years. I never thought it could be personal."

"How could it have been? Avatar Aang died before her second birthday."

"I should have suspected, anyway! I should have considered all angles—"

"Azula, love? You're a perfectionist. You're the biggest perfectionist I've ever met. If you'd stop blaming yourself for a moment, you'd remember that it's impossible to consider things from _all_ angles. You can only pick the most likely paths of enemy action, and hope there isn't a secret dungeon access to your keep you don't know about and they do."

"I still should have moved earlier."

"Yeah, well, that's as much my fault as yours. After all, I knew we had this evil plan to brainwash Tsubasa into being a good guy going on, but I insisted on distracting you with my sexiness, anyway."

Azula's grin was the visual equivalent of a single chuckle: short, sharp, and dry.

"All that being said, now's not the time to think about what we could have done," Sokka said seriously. "Amy's in danger; now's the time to think about what we can do to fix that."

Azula nodded. "You're smart when you want to be."

"Yeah, but don't tell anybody. It could ruin my reputation."

"Alright, let's put our heads together," Azula said.

Sokka nodded. "Tsubasa kidnaps Amadahy. From there, there is three scenarios that I can think of. One: she kills her outright, and is just hiding the body. Let's ignore that for the time being, as there's nothing we can do about it. Two: she's hoping to provoke the Avatar State so that she can kill the Avatar off for real. Three: she's going to lock her in a hole somewhere for the duration of her entire life.

"Tactically speaking, numbers two and three are similar, as in either case she's going to need to lock Amy down, at least temporarily. And she's going to want to do it as far away from us here as possible, but also as far away from as many of her elements as possible. Air and fire are a no go, as air's pretty omnipresent and firebenders can make their own fire, so that leaves earth and water. Or rather, earth _or_ water, as I don't see how you can get away from one except in the middle of an ocean or the other except in the middle of a desert.

"On the one hand, being on the ocean gives them mobility, but on the other, the only element Amy knows how to bend yet is water, so no, it wouldn't be worth it. What do you think, Azula?"

"Hmm? Oh, well, if I were a pair of airbenders planning on capturing the Avatar, I'd want to keep her in a metal tower as high up into the air as possible."

"A pair?"

"Tsubasa was in the womb when her father died; I'm thinking that this is more her mother's vendetta than hers," Azula explained. "And that means that Kazane could have been planning this for sixteen, hell, even eighteen years.

"So Tsubasa gets banished—maybe as part of the plan, but probably she just goofed practiced her forbidden techniques where someone other than Mommy could see her—and so she makes the best of it by going to Omashu and hanging out with King Bumi. The person it would be logical to believe that the Avatar would go to in order to learn how to earthbend—after all, he and Avatar Aang were such good friends.

"Even if the Avatar elected to be trained by someone else, well, the most logical place to find earthbenders is still in the Earth Kingdom, after all, so that's where they'd have set up their hidey hole."

"Hmm," Sokka considered. "Well, I suppose that that's more logical than that Tsubasa's flying by the seat of her pants. Logic's a trap, though, when dealing with people."

"Oh, believe me, I'm fully aware of how the common person laughs in the face of logic on a daily basis," Azula assured him. "Still, Tsubasa had to be thinking about this since Omashu, or at least since Saibei. She's smart enough to know that there's no way she'd pull this off without a good plan. Especially after spending so many weeks going over all the ways in which it could possibly fail, and the constantly changing venue. And yet she made her move on my own turf—_literally_. Why?

"Because her mother is here," Azula said. "The Western Air Temple's not far from here. She could—"

"Okay, I follow you, and it does appear to be the most likely scenario. I just don't want us to be too clever for our own good."

"Duly noted. So, are you thinking what I'm thinking?"

"I'm afraid so," Sokka said. "There's no way we're going to be able to find one random tower in all the earth kingdom. We need leads, and there's only one place I can think of where we're likely to find them. Please tell me that you have some awesome plan or diplomatic powers that will allow you to get the airbenders to let you rummage around their temple, because I've got nothing."

"I've got something."

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"Are you sure you don't want me to come with you, Azula?" Zuko asked.

"This Zhou person says he's going to need as many of the most powerful firebenders in the world as possible when Sozin's Comet returns, and, frankly, if this is what Aang wanted Amy here for, I say there's no such thing as overkill." Azula gave him a sympathetic half-grin. "Sorry about pulling you and Mai apart so shortly after you just reunited."

"Yeah, well, if it can't be helped, it can't be helped. It's not exactly going to be forever, after all—as soon as you rescue the Avatar, you've still got to come back here in case Avatar Aang _wasn't_ talking about Zhou's thing, right?"

"Right," Azula said.

They hugged. "We've already got teams scouring the Fire Nation, in case you're being too smart for your own good, just like you wanted. I'll be joining them shortly. Could I have five minutes with Mai before you left?"

"Of course."

Mai and Zuko walked out of earshot, speaking in low voices.

Sokka held Azula's hand.

"You realize that Kazane was probably careful to not keep anything important at the Western Air Temple, right? And that she'd have destroyed anything useful that she did keep there?" Azula said tonelessly.

"She can't have destroyed everything. Not every last bit of evidence," Sokka said. "There will be something there, we'll find it, and we'll rescue Amy. Just like you rescued me."

Five minutes later, they flew off on Fluffy.

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Amadahy came to. She tried to move, and couldn't. She was bound in a device that was like a cross between a bed frame and an iron maiden. A woman was watching her. "So you're the Avatar?" She looked a lot like Tsubasa, but part of that could have been the clothes.

"So they tell me," Amadahy said.

"How do you like your suite?" Kazane asked. "I had it custom made, just for you."

"Oh, my; someone's been skimming off Temple funds."

"A little bit, but this tower was a joint venture. It turns out that a certain Earth Kingdom satrap near this desert needed a place nearby where he could stash earthbending prisoners away from the earth, and the Dai Li also needed something like that, only completely off the books. I hooked them up with each other, and gave them the plans for this place. I then used some of my dear departed husband's contacts to get it built and staffed for guards, even got a little treaty with the sandbenders." She grinned. "I've actually been making a profit on this place."

"Good for you," Amadahy said dryly.

"It's not about the profit, however. It's about having a place where I could actually imprison the Avatar. There's no water or earth in this tower. So even if you were to somehow magically learn all of the other elements and become a fully realized Avatar overnight and then escape your shackles, you'd still be down to air and fire, and an Avatar limited to the use of one element isn't much more powerful than a really good bender, which I happen to be."

"Air and fire are two elements."

"Firebending is like the retarded little brother of airbending, except when Sozin's Comet is around. If you're going to firebend and airbend at the same time, you might as well just airbend with some spark rocks in your hand." She demonstrated, creating a cone of flame two feet in length. "See?"

"Neat trick. I'm sure it's not indicative of any sort of jealousy towards firebenders at all."

"Your attempts to goad me are cute, but uneffective."

"Well, it was worth a shot. So, now that you're a wanted international criminal, what's step two in your Secret Big Evil Master Plan? Kill me? The Avatar will just reincarnate. So, what, just keep me here until I croak of old age? Awesome plan."

"Not quite." _If you die in the Avatar State, you die for real. So all I need to do is to torture you until you enter the Avatar State to defend yourself. Simple, really._


	15. Chibi Parody of Chapters 9 & 10

The World without the War

S-Michael

Chibi Parody of:

Chapters 9 & 10

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"Greetings, Firelord Iroh," Chibi Kazane said. "I'm here because rumor has it you have a very hot nephew and I want to try and seduce him."

Chibi Iroh sighed. "Oh, this again. _Zuko!_ Okay, he'll be here in a moment. But why does nobody want to try to seduce _me?_"

"…Uh…"

Then Chibi Zuko showed up. "Look, don't touch," he said to Chibi Kazane while checking out his nails.

Meanwhile, Chibi Team Azula was doing stuff.

"You know, your life will be much more fulfilling once you come out of the closet," Chibi Sokka said.

"Damn it, I hate this running gag," Chibi Ty Lee complained. "You just want to see two girls kissing."

"Not 'just,'" Chibi Sokka protested. "I mean, yeah, that would be hot and awesome, but give me _some_ credit for being smart enough to have figured out the world doesn't revolve around my libido."

"Toldja he was smart," Chibi Azula crowed. "That statement alone puts him above ninety-five percent of the male population."

"Hey, what happened to my bit with Amy?" Chibi Katara demanded showing up. "We were standing there for ten minutes waiting for the Fourth Wall to show up."

"Eh, S-Michael thought more lesbian jokes would be more interesting than an infodump that may or may not contain a Checkov's Gun," Chibi Sokka said. "Speaking of lesbians and proving I don't 'just want to see two girls kissing,' Ty Lee, you should totally date Katara."

"What? _I'm_ not a lesbian," Chibi Katara protested.

"What, you expect us to believe you're actually sexually attracted to that bald midget in canon? Give me a break," Chibi Sokka said.

"What about Jet?"

"Ooh, the bad boy; that's totally not a classic closeted-lesbian move _at all_," Chibi Sokka said sarcastically.

"Haru, then."

"Haru doesn't count," Chibi Sokka said. "I mean, hell, _I_ was attracted to him."

"…I hate you," Chibi Katara said darkly.

"I'm just saying that if you marry Ty Lee, I marry Azula, and Mai marries Zuko, we'll all be one big happy family," Chibi Sokka said. "Just saying."

"Now that we've established that S-Michael may be writing a Ty Latara fic in the future, can we move on?" Chibi Mai asked.

So they went to the Royal Palace, where Chibi Katara caught a glimpse of Chibi Zuko and floated through the air with cartoon hearts coming out of her eyes. "So…much…sexiness."

"Huh, guess she's not a lesbian after all," Chibi Sokka said.

"And yet _I'm_ going to be the butt of lesbian jokes for the next ten parodies, aren't I?" Chibi Ty Lee asked rhetorically. "Where's the justice?"

Chibi Sokka ignored her, continuing his train of thought: "Damn it, I was already planning our three simultaneous weddings!"

So our chibi heroes went to bed. "It seems my evil plan is working," Chibi Iroh said.

"Uncle, this plan is no more evil than your 'evil' plan to fluoridate the Fire Nation's water supply to fight cavities," Chibi Zuko said.

Chibi Iroh whimpered. "But…I want an evil plan. All the cool Firelords have one." He thought for a while. "I've got it! I'm going to deliver books and toys to underprivileged kids!"

"I don't think you know how this 'evil' thing is supposed to work," Zuko said.

The next morning Chibi Azula approached Chibi Zuko. "Hey, I can't find Tsu or Amy. Have you got any ideas?"

"Well, there was this woman here last night who kept saying things like 'I'm not Tsubasa's mother,' and 'I'm not here to kidnap the Avatar,' and whose excuse for being here was as transparent as Ty Lee's heterosexuality—"

"Hey!" Ty Lee's voice came from off screen.

"—so does that help? Azula? What's with the sweat drop?"

"…oh, nothing."

The scene shifted, and the chibis were standing on a blank screen.

"What happened?" Chibi Ty Lee asked.

"The parody's over," Chibi Azula said.

"Well, that was quick," Chibi Katara said. "What's with having a parody here in the first place? I thought S-Michael was only putting them between sub-arcs. You know, between the establishing non-arch of the first two chapters and the Sokka-is-kidnapped arch of the next four, etcetera."

"Yeah, well, the next two chapters both end on cliffhangers, apparently," Chibi Azula said.

"Wait, you mean he's already written them? I thought this parody was a desperate stalling tactic to keep from upsetting the almighty schedule," Chibi Sokka said.

"He's working on chapter fourteen, actually; he got a lot done this weekend."

"It's still rather short," Chibi Katara said.

"Yeah, well, there were some rather large infodumps in the source material," Chibi Azula said. "Also, we cut out a lot of the OCs' material, on account of we could and you can't be letting OCs get uppity. Next thing you know, they'll be demanding the right to vote, or something."

"Wait, I know what we can do," Chibi Sokka said. He reached off-screen and pulled Chibi Zuko into the frame.

"…Sexiness…" Chibi Katara said dreamily.

"Yeah, we get it already, you think my boyfriend is hot," Chibi Mai said. "Now shut up already or I'll stab you."

Said Chibi Sokka: "Hey, Zuko: Sure, Jesus can walk on water, but Toph can swim through land."

"Toph probably _can_ swim through land," Chibi Zuko said.

"Okay…Toph solves global warming by Bending the Earth farther from the sun."

"Global Warming isn't a major problem in the Avatar world yet."

"The only reason the world had to wait for the Avatar to return and save them was because Toph didn't feel like doing it."

"That would work in canon, but not in this AU."

"No, you can't pretend those airplane in the night sky are shooting stars, they're just people who've pissed off Toph."

"We also don't have airplanes in the Avatar universe."

"Toph, Chuck Norris, and Jack Bauer walk into a bar, the bar explodes, Toph walks out, the end."

"Wow, you _really_ can't take a hint, can you?" Zuko said.

"You're no fun," accused Chibi Sokka.

"That's because I'm trying to make you go away. Now go away."

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**AN:** This last batch of Toph facts contributed (without their knowledge) by hitchhikerstowel-1, fomorian, and Mr850 on the IMDb _A:TLA_-board thread "Toph Facts".


	16. Ch 11: The Avatar Rescued?

**AN:** with regard to the whole "Ty Larara" thing I mentioned in the chibis, I'm kicking ideas around, but I don't want to wave a magic wand and have everyone suddenly become gay, so if there's any ex-closeted lesbians out there who could give me some pointers on getting Katara out of the closet, that would be much appreciated. (I briefly considered having them both be bi and just having never mentioned it, but that seemed like cheating; also, I don't want to contribute to the media trend of _every_ "lesbian" being a bisexual.) Will _not_ take place in this continuity.

The World without the War

S-Michael

Chapter 11:

In Which Tsubasa Questions Her Faith, and the Avatar is "Rescued"

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Sokka would no doubt be wondering how, exactly, Azula had managed to convene an assembly of the Council of Sisters, and on what authority. It was actually quite simple, to someone who understood humans and had enough mettle to forge an armada with; Azula had simply nabbed random child A, told her to tell Sister B that an assembly was convened to meet with the Fire Nation princess and friends, then nabbed child C and told her to tell Sister D the same thing, so on and so forth, and, just by acting like she was in charge and knew what she was doing, she managed to make it so.

The Council of Sisters was beginning to realize that none of them called for this assembly, and they didn't exactly appreciate being assembled on such short order by a foreign princess, but they were here, and that was the important thing.

"The Avatar has been kidnapped," Azula said.

Suddenly, the annoyance and resentment of the Sisters was gone. "This is disturbing news. We had not realized that the Avatar was even known yet."

So Azula told a distilled version of the tale of her search for and discovery of the Avatar.

"And you think Sister Kazane is responsible for the Avatar's disappearance?"

"She's the one who has the real motive in this. Tsubasa wasn't even born when her father died, but it's entirely possible that Kazane would blame Avatar Aang for her husband's death." _I'd go as far as to say "probable."_ "I asked around, and it turns out that Kazane visited the palace the day before we arrived, claiming to be on official Air Temple business, and disappeared the same night as her daughter and the Avatar. I take it she was not on official business, was she?"

The sisters looked at each other, frowning. "She was not," the spokeswoman admitted.

"Well, then, with your permission, we're going to need to go over her room, her office—every space or piece of paper in the entire Western Air Temple that has ever been associated with her," Azula said.

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Tsubasa awoke in the guard barracks that took up the second floor of this tower. She got dressed, grabbed her glider, walked out onto the balcony, and flew up to the top floor. Tsubasa found that she did not like this place, this nameless desert prison, and even flying, normally an exercise of pure joy for an airbender, couldn't cheer her up.

"Are you alright, Tsubasa?" Kazane asked, meeting her daughter on the balcony and staring out at the desert.

"Let's just get this over with," Tsubasa said.

"It's not up to us how long it takes; if we kill her when she's not in the Avatar State, all of this will have been for nothing," Kazane said. "Relax, Tsu, your friends are probably only now realizing that something is wrong. And they're obviously going to search inside the Fire Nation for you."

_That's not what's really bothering me, and besides…_"You don't know Azula like I do. When Sokka was kidnapped, she immediately headed for the one person we knew had a motive for it. Not because he had a particularly good motive, but because it was the only lead we had. She's going to go to the Western Air Temple, learn my history, and go over everything you or I have ever touched with a fine-toothed comb."

"Good thing I destroyed all evidence that this place exists, then" Kazane said. "Besides, even if you're right, that's going to take time. Even if some vital clue slipped between the cracks and they manage to find a map to this place, it will take time. We'll have gotten Amadahy to go into the Avatar State, killed her, and then we'd have won."

"Not as much time as you might think," Tsubasa said. "It took three days for us to end the last hostage situation, and most of that was traveling from place to place."

Kazane considered her daughter. She wasn't going to be able to do this, she realized. Fighting the dreaded Avatar, that was one thing, but to Tsubasa, Amadahy was an innocent swamp girl, and had been kinda-sorta a friend, in spite of her best efforts to keep everyone at arm's length. No way she'd be able to torture and kill her friend. Well, there was another way, one that Kazane was reluctant to pursue because she was worried that it would make her daughter break, but if it made her break after the Avatar was no more instead of before…

"You know that tall tale, that back in the Imperial days an airbender could suck out your soul?"

"A bunch of superstitious nonsense and anti-Cloud Empire propaganda," Tsubasa said derisively. "Why?"

"Actually, it's not," Kazane said. "Whenever a spirit claims to have created us, what does it say? It says it _breathed life into us_. A baby is not considered to be alive until it draws its first breath. Air is life, wind is soul. Just as some waterbenders can heal, some airbenders can draw the soul from an enemy and consume it."

"Why are you telling me this?"

"That letter you sent after the adventure in the glacier. You said: 'I drew the lives out of these men with their breath, and as I did so, I felt their breath fill me, _energize_ me! It was better than I felt—' we really don't need to go into the rest of that sentence. The point is, I've been thinking, and it sounds like you have the talent."

"And why are you telling me _this?_" Tsubasa demanded.

"Because if you're truly worried about Azula catching us, it seems that you could use that talent on Amadahy. Surely, if her _soul_ were in distress, that would cause the Avatar State to activate."

Tsubasa's knees buckled, and she grabbed the railing. "You want me to _eat_ Amy's _soul?_"

"I want you to put the Avatar into immortal distress, so that the Avatar State will activate."

"I…I _can't!_ This is…great spirits, this is madness! Soul-eating? No—just no."

Kazane patted her daughter on the back. "It was just a suggestion." _Fuck; I've managed to create the worst of both worlds, didn't I? Now she's going to angst over the whole soul eating thing, on the one hand, and angst over the torture on the other. Just, nice going, Kazane. Idiot._

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They searched Kazane's rooms, or rather, Katara, Ty Lee, and Mai searched while Azula and Sokka read every document they brought them. Azula had told them to bring anything with writing on it, no matter how insignificant it might seem.

_Translation: let the smart people decide what's important and what's not,_ Katara thought. Katara had lived with Sokka for her entire life, and it was _still_ hard for her to think of the guy who regularly put unidentified substances in his mouth as a smart guy, so she could only imagine how hard it must be for the others.

"This is everything?" Sokka asked.

"We're tearing up the floors in her place and her office, but yeah, it looks like it."

A twelve-year-old girl came in carrying a box. "The sisters say these are the records you wanted, Sokka," she beamed.

"Thank you so much," Sokka grinned back. "Now, I'm sure my friends could use you in Sister Kazane's rooms, to tell them what's actual Air Nomad stuff and what's not."

"I can do that!" the girl beamed again, and briskly jogged out.

"Truly shameless, the way you're using that girl's crush to get what you want," Azula shook her head in mock-distaste/pity.

"I'm trying to be eviler," Sokka answered. "What do you think?"

"It's hot."

"And I don't need to be here, anymore," Katara said. "Just…get back to work, you two."

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Azula looked at the pile of knickknacks the others' had scounged together. "They look Earth Kingdom-y. Anyone have any deeper insights?"

"Yes, actually," Ty Lee said, picking up a scarf. "This is sandbender. I saw a lot like it in a town with the ice fountain a while ago." She described the desert where the sandbenders lived and its location in the Earth Kingdom. "If you see a cactus, though, don't drink its juice. I found that one out the hard way."

"Well, it certainly sounds like the kind of place _I'd_ build a prison for waterbenders at," Sokka said. Azula looked at him consideringly. "What? I'm not going to do it. Even if some Northern Water Tribesmen probably deserve it."

"No, not that; you gave me an idea," Azula said. "What if she did exactly that?"

"Exactly what?" Sokka asked.

"Built her own prison."

"I don't know. Remember what we were saying earlier about being too clever for our own good, Zul?"

"I don't think that it's _that_ far-fetched," Azula said. "Firstly, she's had the better part of two decades to plan this whole thing out. Secondly, she has her husband's contacts to rely on, or can make her own. Thirdly, one of the few things we really know about Kazane is that she doesn't lack ambitious spirit—you really _can't_ if you plan on taking on the Avatar."

Sokka shrugged. "It's a stretch, but it's a place to start. If we write Zuko for intel on that part of the Earth Kingdom, How long do you think it would take for it to get here?"

"We have intel on the Earth Kingdom," the airbender girl said. "I'm sure I can get Mother to share…you know, since this is the _Avatar_ we're talking about and all." She was visibly blushing.

"Thank you so much," Sokka said encouragingly. The girl beamed, and ran off. "Wow, I had no idea that what's-her-name was related to anyone important."

"Starting to worry about your territory yet, Azula?" Mai asked.

"Maybe if the girl was a couple years older and Sokka even knew her name," Azula answered. "As it stands, I'm just glad of how it seems to be expediting things."

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Tsubasa remembered sucking those men's lives out, unaware that she might be doing more than that. She had often, since then, thought that her airbending was more powerful than it had been, but had always come to the conclusion that it was ridiculous. Only now, she realized that it was not. And considering what was fuelling her newly invigorated airbending talent…she shuddered; shuddered to the depths of her soul.

But she couldn't stop thinking about the implications. She could strengthen her airbending by consuming souls. Now imagine someone with the same capability who lacked her squeamishness with regard to consuming souls. Now imagine that person living in a world where a large part of one's prestige was based on the strength of one's airbending.

The Air Nomads had always depicted their ancestors as defectors from decadence (_"Might _I_ remind _you_ that the reason our ancestors became the Air Nomads was to escape from the thick miasma that _was_ the Empire of Clouds?"_), but hadn't gone into more detail than that. Now, though, she could see an ugly picture forming. Half-remembered tales of non-airbenders about the nigh-infinite power and cruelty of the Empire of Clouds conjoined with the almost impenetrable silence that permiated the Air Temples about anything in Imperial history after the First Dynasty to flesh out the skeletal structures the new information had created in her mind.

So, basically, an indeterminate number of airbenders—and one could never tell who ahead of time—had the ability to suck out your soul, and incentive to do so, if properly trained. Suddenly, all that nonviolence crap the sisters had tried to instill her with her entire life made perfect sense. The question wasn't why they'd restricted knowledge of voidbending—the question was why they'd kept it alive at all!

_No, that makes sense, actually,_ Tsubasa thought. _That way, if it ever gets rediscovered, they'd know what to look out for._

She took off into the sky and flew around for a while. With the prison tower behind her, she cried. Everything she'd believed in her entire life…_was wrong!_ And, if the Empire of Clouds was evil, what did that make the Avatar? It didn't make the Avatar anything, necessarily, and that was the problem. The Avatar was a scary monster that destroyed civilizations and killed husbands and fathers and that the world only loved out of unwashed ignorance, wasn't he…her…it? Wasn't the whole reason she was doing this to protect the world from this monster?

Revenge for her father's death was more Kazane's thing. Tsubasa had never met the man, obviously, so could look on it with a more objective eye. She reasoned, from everything she'd heard of it, that her father's death was one part honest mistake, one part panic, two parts idiocy on her father's part for fighting the Avatar in the first place, and one part karma (supplying drugs to a good third of the Earth Kingdom wasn't the most squeaky clean choice of career options).

So the germ of an idea formed in Tsubasa's mind, one that, like a grain of sand caught in an oyster's shell, could grow into a pearl of treachery. That wasn't yet, though. For now, she told herself that there was nothing inherently wrong with plotting a prison break…solely as a mental exercise, of course. In fact, it was a commendable action; a good general was one who could think like her enemies, right?

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Fluffy landed in a random patch of desert in the dead of night, bellowing at the lone figure now standing a few feet in front of its face.

"Told you Fluffy could find me," Ty Lee shouted up at them.

The others got off of Fluffy. "Where's the prison?"

"Couple clicks thataway," Ty Lee jerked her head.

Azula nodded. "Security's that tight, is it?"

"Well, airborne," Ty Lee said. "Lots of airbenders, like you thought there would be."

The general location of this prison had been pinned down by comparing three data sets: the known and suspected locations of banished airbenders (the Air Nomads kept track of these things), the bios of the rulers of several of the local fifes and their state policies, and what was known of Tsubasa's father's criminal empire. They'd never been able to prove that Kazane had had any knowledge of her husband's crimes, let alone any involvement in them, which explained how she managed to get a position at the Western Air Temple after Avatar Aang died; apparently, she'd had knowledge and influence, at least, given how several of his former associates (among rogue airbenders, at least) had found themselves living near this desert.

Azula's first instinct had been to visit the prince they suspected of financing this prison and…persuade him to tell them about it, but, the logistics of breaking into a palace aside, the cold-blooded torture of a Head of (Pseudo-) State was rarely the best plan diplomatically and they weren't _quite_ in dire straits, so that had been relegated to Plan B.

Plan A turned out to be finding their highest security prison, and then tracking them when they had to move a very sensitive prisoner. (Considering the police state nature of the place, that had not been long.) Of course, there was a small problem; namely, that no one could possibly miss a giant flying bison tracking them for several hours unless they were actively trying to. And so, Ty Lee had hitched a ride on top of one of the carriages, assuring her friends that Fluffy could find her. And so the beast had.

"Alright, then," Azula nodded. "Let's be about it." And so they marched for a couple hours, and came upon the prison at dawn.

Azula checked it out with her spyglass. It was an iron tower built upon a rock, and, as befitted a building built by an airbender, it had a balcony on every last floor. There were a few airbenders flying up and down the building.

The annoying thing was, Sozin's Commet was just a few days away, and with its power, clearing this place out would be a snap for Azula. She briefly considered camping out and waiting for it—

Suddenly, there were more airbenders, and Azula noticed how they were flying; it was a chase. "What the hell is going on?"

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Tsubasa entered Amadahy's cell. The frame was lain in a horizontal position, and Amadahy moved her head as much as she could. "Well, you here to torture me like your mother? You won't get anywhere."

"Not exactly," Tsubasa said, slicing through Amadahy's restraints.

"You're helping me escape after you captured me in the first place? Real consistent."

"I'm a very complicated individual," Tsubasa said dryly. "Can you walk?"

"I don't know—I've been in that thing for a week. All I can say is, thank the spirits your mother factored in sanitary concerns when designing that fucking thing. More for her own sake than mine, I'm sure." She tried, and stumbled.

"Alright, no problem," Tsubasa said. She tied Amadahy to her front with lengths of rope. "Just hold on. As best as you can."

"You've got a plan?"

"Yep. Fly like hell." Tsubasa matched action to words and swiftly flew through the halls.

"Wow. Best plan ever," Amadahy said in her ear.

"Bite me; it's better than it sounds." For the last week, Tsubasa had been tracking down every small animal she could find, and killing it. For the, um, life-energy. And now, she would burn it, running flat-out faster than they could possibly chase her. Far from being a chaotic, panic-stricken flight, Tsubasa had her entire course planned out, and had even set up depots with provisions when she'd admitted to herself that this was no "mental exercise."

It was a good plan, actually. So of course something happened to throw a monkey-wrench in it.


	17. Ch 12: The Big Badass Fight Scene

**AN:** Not _one_ review of chapter 11, seriously? (Well, Kiri reviewed, but she was giving me tips for that other thing I said I might be writing, so it doesn't count.) You people are bastards. (PS: Kiri: get an account so we can PM. They don't cost anything, and all you need is an email address-which you can get at yahoo for no cost of proof of identification if you don't have one.)

The World without the War

S-Michael

Chapter 12:

In Which There is a Big Fight with Much Badassery

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Zhou bowed as the Firelord disembarked his ship. "At ease," Firelord Iroh said. "This island is certainly far enough in the middle of nowhere."

"Easier to ensure no civilian casualties that way, sire," Zhou said.

"Hmm, yes, good thinking," Iroh said. "And the reason why Kai's Pendant is already on fire?"

"It seems to keep the ghosts at bay. I don't know why," Zhou said. With all the years of planning he put into this, all the countless gobbledygook explanations he toyed with, it took him an embarrassing long time to think to just say _I don't know_ when that particular issue came up.

"Hmm, most curious," Iroh said.

"I agree." Then the next passenger exited the boat, and Zhou managed to hide his distaste. "Master Jeong Jeong," he bowed politely.

"You haven't been my student for a long time, Commander Zhou," Jeong Jeong said.

"All the same," Zhou said. "Any news from your niece, my liege?" He half-smiled: "Has she found the Avatar yet?"

Iroh chuckled. "Actually, yes, and even brought her to the Fire Nation. But then the Avatar was kidnapped, and she had to go rescue her. Fear not; I have the utmost faith in my niece's abilities."

"I'm sure she will do just splendidly," Zhou said. _The Avatar was here, but was detained? I am incredibly, incredibly lucky. I even got forewarning that the Avatar is (probably) returning! Looks like I'll have to move up my schedule after Sozin's Comet._

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"Is that…?"

"It looks like Tsubasa has busted Amy out of jail," Azula said.

"But why?"

"I don't know, but we've got to do something. Everyone, get on Fluffy, quick." They scrambled aboard the flying bison and took off.

Tsubasa changed course and landed aboard Fluffy. "Real nice, guys. Way to completely ruin my genius plan to rescue Tsubasa," she complained.

"It looked like your genius plan consisted mainly of running," Azula pointed out.

"Yeah," Sokka chimed in; "if that's your idea of a genius plan, well, you're no Azula is all I can say."

"And did you not notice how much _faster_ I was than them? I managed to radically increase the strength of my airbending—never mind how. If you guys had just lain low—or better yet, not be here _at all_—I'd have gotten Amy to safety, easy as pie. But _no_, now we're going to have to fight an army of mercenary airbenders. And, just for the record, it's all your fault." Tsubasa was untying Amadahy from her front.

"Well, excuse us for coming to aide an Avatar being chased down by an army of hostiles," Azula said, more dryly than with pique. "Also, you might recall that none of this would have happened if a certain someone hadn't decided to kidnap the Avatar in the first place."

"Okay, fair enough," Tsubasa admitted. "So, what are we going to do about our unwanted friends?"

"I know how we start." Azula shot lightning, knocking one of the airbenders from the sky. She took a few seconds to breathe deeply, adjust her stance, then began the perform the motions of shooting lightning again. The airbenders, having taken notice of the first lightning bolt and not being completely retarded, had begun to fly around chaotically. Evasive maneuvers. Every other minute, Azula shot lightning, sometimes hitting her target, sometimes not.

"Can't you do that any faster?" Tsubasa asked.

"Yes, but I'm pacing myself. I don't want to tire before they've come close enough to fight back (or I've got them all, whichever comes first). Also, if they manage to close, I don't want them to know anything more about what I can do than they have to before the fight proper starts."

"Think they'll close?" Katara asked.

Sokka looked through the spyglass, considering it for several minutes. "No way," he said finally. "An airbender and a sky bison fly at about the same speed, and they're doing evasive maneuvers to avoid Azula's lightning, which slows them down and tires them out. There's no way they can catch us."

"What about the sandbenders?" Tsubasa asked.

"What sandbenders?" Sokka asked.

Suddenly, Fluffy lurched violently to the side, barely dodging a harpoon launched from the ground.

"Thanks for the advanced warning, Tsu," Katara said sarcastically.

"Think nothing of it; it's what I'm here for."

Fluffy weaved wildly through the air, dodging rocks and various projectiles launched at him from sand yachts.

"This may even the odds," Sokka said, amending his earlier statement about the certitude of their victory.

"Where'd they get those weapons?" Ty Lee asked. "They didn't have them the last time I saw them."

"Part of the treaty they have with my mother," Tsubasa said.

"Sokka, you're going to have to come up with our strategy for when they catch us," Azula said. "I'm a bit busy concentrating on not blowing us all up with my lightning."

"Sure thing, love," Sokka said.

"_Sokka's_ in charge? We're doomed," Tsubasa said.

"Amy, can you fight?" Sokka asked.

"At the moment, I can barely stand," Amadahy answered truthfully.

"Can you hold a knife and be threatening?"

"If I have to, I suppose."

"That'll have to do. Ty Lee, get us close to one of those sand yachts. Alright, guys, here's the plan: we split into two teams, all of us except Azula, who stays here to snipe at the airbenders. Tsubasa, Mai and I will take one yacht, Amy, Ty Lee, and Katara will take another. Tsubasa can airbend our yacht, but you guys are going to need to hold a sandbender hostage, which is why Amy needs a knife."

Mai gave her one.

"Alright, good. Tsubasa, can you drive the yacht and attack at the same time?"

"Did you not hear me when I said I have a lot of power burning through me at the moment? Yes, Sokka, I can."

"Good, that means each team has a bender on offense. Alright, let's go down there and wreck shit, people!"

Fluffy went close to the earth, almost landing, in fact, and Sokka's team jumped for a yacht. Mai unleashed a cascade of knives, and in just a few seconds they were the only ones on it. "Tsu, drive! Mai, help me with this giant crossbow." The non-benders began to work the device, when Fluffy jerked up, leaving a cloud of sand in his wake. Two yachts which were shooting at him hit each other instead. Tsubasa drove the yacht with one hand, using the other to shoot razor wind at nearby yachts.

Sokka aimed the crossbow. "Fire!" Mai fired. A yacht which had been shooting some rather esoteric flaming projectiles _blew up_. Just then, it occurred to Sokka that if they'd taken that yacht instead of blowing it up, they could have set other yachts on fire. Ah, well. "Alright, let's reload and do it again." The flip side of that was that they could have been the ones to get blown up, of course.

Meanwhile, Fluffy went low again, and the other team commandeered a yacht; Katara knocked three sandbenders into the sand with her water whip, while Ty Lee blocked the chi of another while Amadahy…concentrated on standing without falling, and threatening the driver. The sandbenders had realized what was happening, and began firing at the two enemy yachts; Katara knocked a boulder out of the air with her water whip.

"Get us closer to one of the other land ships," Ty Lee ordered. The frightened sandbender obeyed, and Ty Lee jumped across, proceeding to slice through its crew like a knife through warm butter.

"Damn; we really ought to be letting her do this on her own," Katara said.

Tsubasa also saw Ty Lee's actions. "You know, guys, I could probably run this whole ship by myself, including using airbending to throw the crossbow bolts. Why don't you try something like that?"

Mai looked at Sokka, raising an eyebrow. "I'm up for it if you are, fearless leader."

"Let's," Sokka said solemnly, nodding. Tsubasa drove close to another yacht and the non-benders jumped aboard. Mai cut down most of the sandbenders with her knives, but left one to drive. Sokka fired the weapon, a catapult, once, then, instead of reloading, drew his machete and began working the bolts holding it to the craft.

Meanwhile, Ty Lee had jumped back across to Katara's yacht. "See about closing with another one," she said.

A massive wall of sand came over them, but Katara blocked it with her water. "Hope you're not wasting all our water supplies," Amadahy said, sounding quite conversable in spite of the setting.

"I'm being careful not to lose any drop I can manage," Katara said, voice straining with effort. "It's hard work, so don't talk to me."

Sokka managed to cut the catapult loose, which fell directly into the path of an oncoming sand yacht. The yacht did not manage to swerve in time. "Alright, get us close to another one, and take him with us," he nodded at the sandbender driving. "Other sandbenders would be less inclined to drive for us if we go around killing our drivers, after all."

Mai nodded. "You heard the man," she said to the driver, who was on one hand grateful to still be alive and on the other terrified that this nightmare wasn't going to end yet.

Meanwhile, Tsubasa was burning every drop of her ill-gotten energy to whip her land yacht around, not simply blocking sandbending attacks, but forcing her own attacks _through_ them at the enemies. They were beginning to dread her approach, but she was going so much _faster_ than them…

As Ty Lee jumped to another yacht to dispose of its crew, Amadahy put her weight on her foot wrong, causing her to stumble and fall. The sandbender took advantage of this, and attacked. Her attack was short-lived, as Katara knocked her off of the bow of the ship, but this created another problem, as she'd just killed their driver. They began slowly to decelerarte.

Katara looked at the empty sail. "Fuck," she said flatly.

"No shit," Amadahy agreed. She regained her feet, assumed a stance as close to the sandbending stance she'd seen as she could, and tried it. She willed the sand to obey her…and it did. "Well fuck me; I _am_ the Avatar!" She concentrated on not shredding the sail with her newfound skill.

Fluffy continued to dodge the slings and arrows (boulders and harpoons) of sandbenders, while Azula continued to snipe the airbenders pursuing them. Being airbenders, they had plenty of natural talent, but they were not military-trained. Their movements fell into patterns, and as soon as she identified one, it became her next target; she missed rarely. The combined efforts of concentrating on her lightning as Fluffy dodged and weaved while keeping track of—and predicting—her targets while _they_ dodged and weaved took a considerable portion of her consciousness, a small voice in the back of her head said: _We're winning._

Of course, that could change at any time. All the enemy really needed was a lucky shot—Fluffy screamed. Everyone (but Azula, obviously) looked up, to see a harpoon sticking out of the great beast's side. He began to plumet.

"Aw, hell nah," Sokka said.

Tsubasa spun her yacht around so that she was driving it backwards, sliced off the protruding bits with airbending, and gestured at Sokka and Mai. Sokka nodded, receiving the message.

"Driver, align our yacht in front of that yacht there."

"But—"

Mai held a blade to his throat. "Do it. Fluffy only _might_ kill you." The sandbender gulped, and obeyed.

They aligned their skiffs, and Fluffy sank towards them. "Alright, now for the hard part," Sokka said.

"What's the hard part?" Mai asked.

"Not being crushed to death," Sokka said.

The sandbender tried to jump, but Mai caught him. "Uh-uh; you still need to drive this thing. Besides, if you jump off the _bow_ of a ship, all you'll get is crushed to death, idiot." They crowded towards the front of the land yacht, and Fluffy landed with four feet on theirs and two on Tsubasa's. He'd even managed _not_ to crush both yachts to smithereens, a feat Sokka had honestly been skeptical of.

"Alright, then," Sokka said. To the sandbender: "Keep this thing going, or else Fluffy will eat you. Mai, let's go." They climbed Fluffy's flank to the saddle, and from there gestured to Katara and Amadahy for them to come get them.

"Hey, Azula, could I distract you from your lightning for a moment?" Tsubasa asked.

"If the airbenders catch us, we're dead," Azula said.

"More dead than if the sandbenders crush us all between them?"

"Fair point. What do you want?"

"A cone of fire right there—" she gestured with her face to Fluffy's left "—so that we can combine our talents and create a huge wall of fire and destroy those ships over there."

"Using your airbending as a bellows for my firebending. Brilliant!" Azula said.

"We'll have to wait for Katara to get here, though, so she can protect our right—your left—while we're distracted."

"Well, naturally," Azula said in an "it goes without saying" tone of voice.

Katara, Amadahy, and Ty Lee's yacht arrived.

"Katara, get up here and protect Fluffy's port and bow—er, right flank and face. Mai, let's get down there," Sokka said.

"Are you sure you want to keep using this thing?" Amadahy called up. "I'm losing my battle to not destroy the sail."

"Let's go get another one, then," Sokka said.

"What, without a bender to protect us from the sand waves?" Mai asked.

"We ought to get away with it, if we're fast enough."

Pause. "You know, you come up with the most unboring plans," Mai said.

"Glad you approve," he said dryly as they headed out into the maelstrom of sand and blood. As they did so, Tsubasa and Azula's combined air and fire attack destroyed several yachts on Fluffy's left, though all Sokka's team could see was a giant wall of blue flame on the air bison's far side. They jumped aboard another yacht, disposing of the crew. Another great wall of flame came briefly into being, presumably destroying more land yachts, and then the sandbenders began to retreat.

"Ha-ha!" Sokka crowed triumphantly. "You see that? Do not mess with us, for we are avatars of destruction, and will totally ruin your shit! We won! Nothing can stop us now!" They heard an audible crack coming from the yacht supporting Fluffy's foreparts. "And _of course_ something goes wrong as soon as I say that."

"Get us over there," Ty Lee said.

"I'm working on it; I'm rather new to this, you know." Amadahy drove the yacht close to the one supporting Fluffy's foreparts.

"Alright, Fluffy, slowly move this way, okay?" Ty Lee ordered.

The great beast did so.

"You get over here, too," Sokka told the driver.

"I—yes, sir."

As soon as Fluffy's weight was off of it, the thing flipped over onto its face.

"Alright, drive this thing. Everyone else, let's get back up in the saddle. Mai, help me help Amy."

"Ugh," Amy said, disgusted by her own relative uselessness. "The irony; this is exactly the sort of situation y'all tell me the Avatar should be dealing with, and here I am, barely able to stand."

"How's it going?" Sokka asked.

"Pretty good," Azula said. Sokka looked, and saw that there were barely a dozen airbenders left. Azula shot more lightning, and there was one less.

"Great spirits, why haven't they broken ranks yet?" Sokka demanded of no one. "They're not ex-military, are they? Do airbenders have a military?"

"No, the Air Nomads are a peaceful people who abhor killing things," Azula said.

"One wouldn't think it, from our experiences with them," Sokka said.

"Our experiences with them are hardly typical."

"Yeah, one would hope not."

"We're pulling away," Amadahy said.

"Of course we are," Azula said. "We're being pushed and pulled by airbending and sandbending simultaneously and can go in a straight line, while they have to weave to avoid my attacks. In short, it's all over but the curtain."

Suddenly, there was cracking from the rear yacht. "You just _had_ to say it, didn't you?" Sokka managed to say before it gave way and their momentum carried them forward into the desert sand. Tsubasa floated to the ground and landed softly, holding her glider above her head and using it like a parachute.

The sandbender dragged himself out. "I—"

"You can go," Sokka said. The sandbender ran.

"Alright, it looks like we're making our stand here," Azula said as she got to her feet, dusted herself off, and then fired more lightning. "Take a moment to prepare yourselves."


	18. Ch 13: The Hannibal Lecture

**AN:** In a naked grab for more readers (and/or reviews), I'm changing up the schedule (on the theory that different people frequent ffn on different days of the week, apparently): I will now update on Mondays and Thursdays one week, and Tuesdays and Fridays the next (chibis on Saturdays, when there are chibis). Probably should have thought of this _before_ hitting the 50k-word mark in order to not scare off the tl;dr crowd, but eh.

The World without the War

S-Michael

Chapter 13:

In Which Azula Delivers a Hannibal Lecture (Interrupted by the Ghosts of Airbending Avatars Past), and Using Sozin's Comet for Evil is Inconceivable

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Kazane and her minions landed in a circle around them. "Surrender; there's no place to run."

Azula quirked a smile. "Surrender? Did you _see_ how this fight's been going?"

"We've got you surrounded," Kazane pointed out.

"Your troops are tired, demoralized, and, properly speaking, not troops at all," Azula retorted. "They're hired thugs, former drug runners. I'm surprised that they haven't broken ranks and fled already.

"And you? You're an emotional cripple, a woman who hasn't accepted her husband's death in nearly two decades, someone who, not being able to avenge yourself on the man 'responsible'—and I use that word very loosely—choose to 'avenge' yourself on a teenage girl. And if, somehow, you manage to succeed, guess what?" She grinned. "Your husband's not going to come back, and that rage you feel's not going to go away. So who're you going to kill next? Who are you going to lash out at in blind fury?

"The truth is, Kazane, everything I need to know about you is written all over your face. I see the impotent fury, the refusal to admit even to yourself—_especially_ to yourself—that your husband was an asshole and deserved what he got. And because you couldn't accept that, you turned to the teachings of the Empire of Clouds, didn't you? It wasn't even for whatever strength domination-airbending would give you, either, not really—it was to have some way, any way, of justify your grudge against the Avatar other than avenging a scumbag like your husband.

"And that's why I'm not afraid of you. See, the general who knows her enemy as she knows herself need not fear a thousand battles…and even your own daughter knows that you're full of shit. Why else would she turn on you?"

Kazane gripped her glider with bloodless knuckles, red-faced. "Fuck you, girl. You say the Avatar wasn't responsible for my husband's death? You weren't there."

Suddenly, a whirlwind surrounded Amadahy, and when it left, in her place was a bald man with a white moustache. "No, but I was," said Avatar Aang. He was even dressed in Air Nomad garb, somehow, down to his own glider. "Your husband was the kingpin of a drug empire. I chased him down and demanded his surrender. I demanded his surrender several times, in fact. He chose to fight, and I fought him back. He was crushing me against a rock, so I shot lightning at him. I only wanted to knock him out, but I must have miscalculated the power I put into that attack. He was a very bad man, but still, killing him is something I've regretted for the entire rest of my life. It's probably why I died so young, as well."

The whirlwind was back and then when it left, there was a female airbender. "I am Avatar Yang Chen. In my day, there was a brief resurgence of Cloud Empire sympathies, and I am the reason that it was 'brief.'" She was considerably colder than Avatar Aang, but his warmth was still there, just cooler, if that makes any sense at all. "I crushed it as ruthlessly as I crushed every threat to peace in my day.

The whirlwind was back, and then the person who was there was…different. He had the gray eyes of an airbender, and a glider, but his clothing was the gray storm clouds, save for a cerulean cloak which had a sapphire clasp, his hair black and short-cropped rather than shaved, and he held his glider, which was made out of bronze rather than wood, like a weapon. And his eyes were cold.

"I am Avatar Taru," he said in an odd and archaic accent. "I had many titles. High Prince Taru, Avatar Taru, Taru of the Comet, Taru Kinslayer, Taru Lord-of-Fire. I was born a prince in the imperial house, learned that I was the Avatar, and while I learned to control what I thought of then as the lesser elements, I saw the wickedness my family and our predecessors—indeed, our entire way of life—had inflicted on the world.

"And so when I returned home, I studied the records and saw the pattern in the comings of the comet that gives firebenders hundredfold strength. In one day, I toppled a civilization. The great aurorapolae of the airbenders were ashes beneath my feet. I slew my father in the burning wreckage of Aurorapolis Primus itself, using the very element he thought weakest of all: fire.

"I struck the balance of the old world and created a new world order, the current world order, which has existed for some nine hundred years and is still going strong. I struck down the Empire of Clouds, creating the Earth Kingdom in the Far Provinces, the Water Tribes at the Poles, and the Fire Nation in our heartland, letting the nomads keep what was theirs, with the additions of a few aurorapolae that weren't being used any more, considering the number of refugees they were taking in."

He half-grinned. "And my husband was no pushover, either.

"There's a reason Aang, Yang Chen, and I have shown ourselves to you. We're your most hated Avatars, the ones who did the most to stomp out Dominators—and all of us airbenders. _I'm_ the airbender who destroyed our empire, along with being the Avatar who created the precedence of maintaining order and balance in the world. What does that tell you?"

"That you have no loyalty to your own kind," Kazane answered.

Taru shrugged. "Well, I tried this Aang's way, and my time here is short, so…"

"No," Azula snapped.

"But—" Taru protested.

"_I_ will handle this, many-times-great-grandfather," Azula said. "My way. It is fitting, as we're the ones who will have to live with the consequences."

"As you wish." The whirlwind returned, and Amadahy collapsed to the ground, unconscious.

"You should have let him kill me," Kazane said. "Now there's only six of you to nine of us."

"I didn't _need_ his help," Azula said. "What I said earlier is still true. Those nine airbenders are all that remain out of three dozen. Besides, I'm sure Tsubasa would object if we killed her mother, and I try not to give my friends psychological issues if I can help it.

"Which is why, in my infinite mercy, I offer you this deal: Run. Just get on your glider, and fly away. We keep our lips sealed until we reach the Western Air Temple, but once we're there, we tell everything, and if I were you, I'd be gone from this place by then. You're lucky I'm feeling generous, and that there's much less hassle involved this way than in trying to keep an airbender in captivity.

"Oh, let's be honest, it's not mercy, generosity, or hassle that's motivating me to do this. You simply are not important, in the grand scheme of things. The only reason I'd rather see you alive than dead is that Tsubasa will be a more useful ally if she's not a guilt-ridden wreck, but if you're too dumb to accept what is an unreasonably generous offer, whatever the motivations behind it, well, you'll get what's coming to you.

"Maybe you think you can win, in spite of how we carved through a fleet of sandbenders, but look at your men and women. _They_ don't think you can win. They think that you're facing gods of battle and avatars of wrath, and the fact that I was offered the aid of a fully realized Avatar—and turned it down—only makes it worse. Go ahead, take a look; I won't blindside you, firescout's honor. Any officer to have ever led people into battle would tell you the same thing I'm telling you right now: You've already lost. So, care to be reasonable, or will there be more pointless carnage?"

Kazane looked at her airbenders, saw the way that some swallowed nervously, some shivered in the heat, and some sweated. She nodded, "You won this round." She took off, and her airbenders followed her.

"Not that I'm not grateful, but was that wise?" Tsubasa asked.

"It's a calculated risk," Azula said.

"A 'calculated risk'? What's the calculation?" Tsubasa demanded.

"That you're more valuable as an ally than she is dangerous as an enemy," Azula said frankly.

"Oh. I should be flattered, I suppose."

"Well, let's go before she can get her non-airbenders out here," Azula said. "Katara, see about healing Fluffy. Tsubasa I assume you had a rout of egress mapped out."

"A direct line to the nearest city of a state not allied with Mother. It's not very stealthy, being based on the logic that I'd be going much faster than my pursuers."

"Well, we're still going to be going faster than anyone on foot or cavalry," Azula said.

"I'm going to check out the rear yacht," Sokka said. "See if it's salvageable."

"Right. Mai, help him, Ty Lee, see to Amy, then help Katara."

"And me?" Tsubasa asked.

"Come with me for a moment," Azula said. They walked a short distance away. "I need to know why you did it. Not why you betrayed us, that's crystal clear, and I have some sympathy, having had some experience with a parent with a psychotic ideology. I need to know what caused your change of heart—why, after capturing her, you turned around and _rescued_ the Avatar."

"What about what you told Mother about being able to see everything you need in her face? Can't you do that with me, too?"

"A mild exaggeration that comes in handy when I need to intimidate a mark," Azula admitted.

Tsubasa hesitated.

"It's just between you and me, Tsubasa," Azula assured her. "You know how I can read people; if I tell the others that I trust you, they'll accept it."

Tsubasa considered. "She told me…I can eat souls."

"What, like the tall tale?"

"Yeah, like that."

"So how you managed to boost your airbending…?"

"Ratbats, pests, and a hive of vulturebees that lived under the prison," Tsubasa said. "Also, those Glacier Plateau jerkoffs, accidentally."

Azula nodded, frowning in thought. "Is the power boost permanent?"

"I don't think so. I _think_ that the power can be burned off, but until I actually use it, I won't lose it through disuse. Though all of that is just theory."

"I can see the ugly implications you'd have drawn from this," Azula said.

"Did I pass your little test?" Tsubasa asked sourly.

"Sorry, but I had to be sure," Azula said. "Let's go help Sokka."

"Just one thing, though…"

"Yes?"

"Was Avatar Taru really going to kill my mother?"

"They say that with each incarnation, the Avatar learns a little bit more of what it means to be human," Azula said. "Inversely, that mean that the farther back in the chain of Avatars you go, the _less_ human they become." They returned to the group.

"I managed to heal Fluffy, but he's lost a lot of blood," Katara said. "I don't know whether or not it's a truly dangerous amount of blood—I've never worked on a sky bison before—but he's not going to be very useful for a while."

"Sokka, can you fix that sand boat?"Azula asked.

"No way, the thing split right down the middle. The hull is kindling," Sokka said.

"Right, I'll go get another one," Tsubasa said, and flew off. Ten minutes later, she was back. "I'm pretty sure this is one of the yachts Ty Lee attacked. If we can get that stupid beast's ass in the air, we can slip this thing under it and do as we did in the battle."

"Alright, but let's pick up some of this wreckage," Sokka said. "I want to try and support Fluffy's middle as best we can."

All in all, it took them a half hour to get going, but then they did, and they rode like the wind across the desert sands. For several hours, Tsubasa pushed the yachts. As the sun lowered in the sky, Azula climbed down Fluffy's tail to talk to her.

"Aren't you tired?"

"No."

"You've been airbending for several hours straight."

"It's not _my_ energy I'm burning," Tsubasa said. "Not mine by right, at any rate."

"You want it out of your body as fast as possible, don't you?"

"Oh dear _spirits_, yes!"

Azula nodded, and climbed back into Fluffy's saddle where the others were waiting.

"Well?" Amadahy asked.

"She took a chi-enhancing drug before leaving that prison so that she'd be able to go faster than her pursuers, but now she's got to burn the energy off, or it will damage her chakra," Azula said. She sat with Sokka.

"So why didn't the pursuers take it?" he asked out of the corner of his mouth.

"Didn't you hear me? It's dangerous. Besides, it takes a while to work its way into the system. By the time they'd done it, she'd have been long gone."

"Ah," he said nothing more.

A few minutes later, they stopped. "I buried some supplies near here. Food and water," Tsubasa called up. She jumped about fifteen feet and brought her staff down on the sand like a great hammer, airbending the sand away. "Aw, c'mon!" The others jogged up to see a collection of three clay pots…busted open and empty.

"You underestimated the cleverness of desert creatures when it comes to finding food and water," Azula said.

"At least we have our supplies," Ty Lee said. "Plus what's in the yachts."

"Yeah, I guess we'll survive, but…_man!_" Tsubasa said. "It's just that it's a long way out of this desert, and if this is what happened to all of my hidden caches, and if you guys hadn't shown up…"

"You're welcome," Azula said solemnly. Tsubasa nodded wordlessly.

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"You've put a lot of thought into this," Iroh said, noticing the arrangement, which was specifically designed so that as many firebenders could fire at Kai's pendant at one time as possible.

"Thank you, sire; to be fair I've had a lot of time to think about it," Zhou said. _Quite a bit more than you realize._

Iroh nodded.

"Right, then," Zhou said. "This is just a practice run to make sure no one burns anyone else's face off, so don't strain yourselves, people! Sozin's Comet won't be here until tonight, and I need you all fresh and ready when it gets here. I'll also be preparing a special chi-enhancing tea I imported from the earth kingdom; I figure every little bit helps, and we only have one shot at this, so it's definitely better to overkill it than not go far enough.

"Alright, then, everyone in position? Good. Care to do the honors, my liege?"

"With pleasure," Firelord Iroh said. "Three…two…one…fire!"

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Tsubasa had driven them all through the first night and part of the next morning. Towards the end, they'd suddenly started slowing—still going very fast, but slower than they had been. Tsubasa had grinned, saying "I did it," and then promptly passed out on Fluffy's tail. The others woke Fluffy up and got him to blow on his own sail. After all, the farther they got, the faster, the better. He wasn't really up to that much, but Amadahy helped, trying hard not to destroy the sail in the process.

Tsubasa woke after seven hours, and revealed that she'd gathered other sails while she'd gotten the yacht, on account of Amadahy destroying them, and so she'd simply replaced the sail, and then they drove the yachts together as Fluffy slept some more. They went much slower that day (and even slower that night, once Amadahy had gone to bed) than they had the day before, and when Tsubasa woke up the next afternoon she was sore and cramped…as if she'd spent a whole day bending, rather than just waving her hands around while things happened. She'd never been so happy to be in pain in her life.

Then Azula informed her that she'd be taking over tonight.

"I wasn't aware that you could airbend," Tsubasa said.

"I can't, but I can rocket, and tonight is Sozin's Comet, which will increase my power a hundredfold," Azula said.

"Hundredfold?" Sokka asked, leaning against Fluffy's tail. "I'm glad Firelord Iroh's a good guy, is all I can say."

Azula snorted. "Even if he wasn't, how exactly do you imagine he'd be able to use it for evil?"

"You're asking me how I think something that increases _your army's power one hundred fold_ could possibly be used for evil?" Sokka asked incredulously.

"Oh, sure, it sounds easy when you say it like that, but you're not looking at the bigger picture," Azula said. "The comet comes for one day, and then it is gone, once every hundred years. Anything I take with the comet, I'd have to hold _without_ it. And the world would know that what happened on the day of the comet was, for all practical purposes, a one-time event, completely unrepeatable—and if _that_ doesn't give would-be insurgents hope, I can't imagine what would!

"In short, if I have enough soldiers to hold the territory I gained under Sozin's Comet, I probably had enough to take a good chunk of it," Azula concluded. "I mean, being able to avoid all those casualties is no kick in the teeth, but strategically, Sozin's no be-all-end-all. If you're holding people down, you're still going to need a lot of soldiers to make it stick. If, however, you're trying to throw off someone else's yolk, well, that's another story, entirely."

Sokka thought about it, then nodded. "You're probably right."

"'Course I am."

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Towards dawn, Zhou wished that he'd drank some of the chi-enhancing tea (which he'd spiked with amphetamines to keep the firebenders awake all night), but he needed his head clear, now most of all. The first cracks of dawn would be here, soon. He mentally reached out, and shrank the power absorption field. "Kai's Pendant" instantly turned into molten metal and broken stones.

The sun rose, the comet faded. Zhou signaled for them to stop. He felt the heat of the smoldering mass, touched the one cool spot, and pretended to burn himself, filching a single piece of amber.

"We have done it! Kai's Pendant is no more!" People cheered. It was a pity that all that antique jewelry had to be destroyed, but it was worth it, for this night Zhou's little bauble had eaten all the power directed at it by some three dozen of the most powerful firebenders in the world while under the influence of Sozin's Comet, chi-enhancing tea, and amphetamines combined (and, Agni bless 'em, they'd put their all into it)—and Zhou could access that power any time he wanted, just like all the other power he'd fed into it over the years.

It was said that Sozin's Comet increased a firebender's power a hundred fold, and that the tea increased a 'bender's power tenfold, combine that with the number of 'benders who'd been concentrating all of their energy at it for several hours…my. Zhou's head almost spun with the sort of power he suddenly had. He was suddenly the most powerful 'bender in the history of the world.

That might have been enough…for less ambitious souls.

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**AN:** Before anyone asks how Taru had children if he was gay—he adopted, duh.


	19. Ch 14: Team Toph

**AN:** Several announcements.

Firstly, today (Thursday 30 September as of now, CST) is my birthday, so I expect many accolades and salutations on having successfully made yet another tedious trip around the sun (and I totally didn't think of that when I changed my schedule). Twenty-five. Huh.

Secondly, with the addition of this chapter, this fic has become my longest fanfic ever (and we still have a whole act left, in stage lingo); I'll also be expecting congratulations on that, though to a lesser extent (which is kind of odd, logically speaking, as it's the more strenuous and unusual achievement).

Thirdly, this chapter also happens to be the longest so far, even without this Author's Note, and I know that because, even after decapitating the header and removing the breaks, Microsoft Word puts it at the absolute roof of my arbitrary word-count quota (2700-3300 words). So yeah.

Fourthly, the reason I'm posting this early (actually, I'm staying up past midnight on Wednesday and posting then) is that, once again, it's my birthday, and I realized that I have plans today. (Also, it gives you more time to wish me a happy birthday.)

The World without the War

S-Michael

Chapter 14:

In Which We See What "Team Toph" has been Doing All This Time

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Doro Kim was awoken by the sensation of being tied and bound. What the…? Kasha? Usani?

Usani chuckled. "Hey, there, Dodo Head. You know, it was really brave of you, befriending the Glacier Plateau Raiders, gaining their trust, and then wiping them out." But…that's not what he was doing… "What's that, Dodo Head? You didn't wipe them out? Why, it must have been you! They just got creamed earlier this night, and when the local cops investigate your homicide, they're going to find proof that you signed off on the op that accomplished it."

Doro Kim's eyes widened at the word "homicide," which caused Usani to chuckle again. "Oh, yes. See, it seems that a few of them must have survived your purge, and decided to take revenge on the man responsible." She grinned. "You get to die a martyr." She nodded at Kasha, and that was the last Doro Kim Ever saw.

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Omashu again. Kasha had seen his first Toph Fact in Omashu. It was really all quite immature; if the notorious outlaw was even aware of these "facts," she was no doubt embarrassed as hell, but the powers-that-be in Ba Sing Se had declared it seditious material and stepped on it harshly, or as harshly as they could with the passive aggressive (or in Bumi's case, obstructively helpful) resistance put up by some vassals, which sent a message which couldn't be more in the outlaw's favor if she had dreamed it up herself: The totalitarian, tyrannical Dai Li were treating a childish joke like an actual threat to its power.

Kasha sighed. He remembered, in this very city, coming to the conclusion that Long Feng knew what he was doing, and deciding to leave it at that. He seemed to remember it leaving a faintly uneasy feeling in the back of his mind, though that could be bias affecting memory.

Last time he was here, he was a naïve, patriotic boy. Now…he was still a naïve, patriotic boy, he guessed. Only thing was, he now had a different idea entirely about what was in the best interests of the people of the Earth Kingdom.

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"Oh, hey there, Toph," the Mechanic said.

"Something wrong, Mac?" Toph asked.

"You know that refrigeration idea he's been working on? Turns out someone in the Fire Nation already invented it a while ago," Teo said.

"Oh. Harsh," Toph said.

"Why'd they invent the thing and only use it in Boiling Rock Prison? Not even for food, either; it doesn't make any sense!" the Mechanic complained. Then a look came to his eye. "Unless…it's somehow inefficient—some fatal flaw of some sort. I wonder if they'd let me look at it after our new government is established…"

"So, does everything check out in the Foggy Swamp?" Toph changed the subject.

"Oh, yes; they've built the…well, _all_ the various things exactly to specification."

Toph nodded. "Well, you have a better idea of the travel time to get them from there to within striking distance of Ba Sing Se and of when Sozin's Comet will be here, so you tell me: when should we move them?"

"The sooner, the better."

"Alright, then; send a message to Tho."

"One more thing," Teo said. "We need some more 'Toph Bei-Fong Facts' for the next leaflet."

"Use 'The reason "Toph Bei-Fong Facts" are proscribed is that the Dai Li are afraid of the truth,'" Toph said. "Repeats make it look less professional, and besides, that one's actually true."

Toph Bei-Fong Facts were great propaganda, not because anyone believed them, but because everyone knew that they weren't supposed to believe them—and the Dai Li proscribed them, anyway. It illustrated by example the oppressiveness of the Ba Sing Se regime.

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The door to Long Feng's office opened and Kasha was ushered into the office by a secretary, who then closed the door, not entering the room himself. The young officer glanced at the two guards standing against the far wall behind Long Feng. The Director of the Dai Li was seated at a desk near the middle of the room, studying a dossier open before him, though he was surreptitiously studying the boy.

He was impressed by Kasha's glance at the guards. Calmly assessing, it seemed—just long enough to assure himself that they were not particularly concerned about him. (Their stance was alert, of course; Long Feng wouldn't have tolerated anything else from his personal bodyguards.) But there was nothing visible in Kasha's alertness beyond training and habit; none of the subtle signs which would have indicated that a man about to be arrested or secretly murdered had just been ushered into Long Feng's presence. Very few people could have pulled it off—Long Feng knew, because he'd seen very many people stand where Kasha was now standing; the boy was either blessed by a completely secure conscience, or he was a phenomenally good actor.

Kasha marched briskly to Long Feng's desk, though he was careful not to get _too_ close. Most young subordinates in that position would not have been able to disguise their anxiety. Long Feng was dragging out the process simply to reinforce that he was the boss and that his subordinate was completely at his mercy; a word from him could destroy a career—or worse. But from this youngster . . . nothing. Just an impassive face and stance, as if he possessed all the patience in the universe and not a trace of its fears.

"You're a self-possessed young man, Lieutenant Kasha," Long Feng murmured. "I approve of that—as long as you don't let it get out of hand."

Kasha simply gave Long Feng a brisk nod of the head; Long Feng pushed the dossier aside a few inches. "I've now studied this report on the Glacier Plateau affair which you brought back from Saibei. I've studied it three times over, in fact. And I'll tell you that I've never seen such a cocked-up mess in my life."

Long Feng fingered the pages of the report. "One of the pages in this dossier consists of your own record. Saibei was your first major assignment, true, but you graduated almost at the top of your class in the academy—third, to be precise—so let's hope you can match the now you tell me the truth, young Kasha."

Kasha glanced down at the dossier. "I haven't seen Doro Kim's replacement's report, Director, but, at a guess, I'd say he was concerned with minimizing the damage to Doro Kim's reputation."

Long Feng snorted. "No kidding. If I took this report at face value, I'd have to think that Doro Kim engineered, just, an absolutely _brilliant_ propaganda coup in Saibei—in which, sadly, he lost his own life due to an excess of physical courage."

Long Feng snorted again. "As it happens, however, I was personally quite familiar with Doro Kim. And I can tell you for a fact that the man was neither brilliant nor possessing of an ounce of courage more than the minimum needed for his job." His voice grew a bit harsh, "So now why don't you tell me what really happened?"

"What really happened was that Doro Kim tried to put together a scheme that was too clever by half, it all came apart at the seams, and the rest of us had to keep it from blowing up in all our faces." He stood a bit more rigidly. "In which, if you'll permit me to say so, I think we did a pretty good job."

"'Permit me to say so,'" mimicked Long Feng, but there was no great sarcasm in his tone. "Youngster, I'll permit any of my officers to speak the truth, provided they do so in the service of the state." He moved the dossier a few inches farther away from him. "Which I'd have to say, in this case, you probably are. I assume you saw to it that Doro Kim went under the knife himself?"

"Yes, Director, we did. Somebody in charge had to take the fall—and be dead in the doing—or we couldn't have buried the questions."

Long Feng stared at him. "And who—I want a name—did the actual cutting?"

Kasha didn't hesitate for a moment. "I did, Director."

The room was silent for perhaps twenty seconds, with Long Feng continuing to stare at the young officer standing at attention before him—and the guards entering into earthbending stances. Then, abruptly, Saint-Just issued a dry chuckle. "Remind me to congratulate the head of the academy for his perspicacity. Very good, Captain Kasha—and yes, that's a promotion. Very good, indeed."

The relaxation in the room was almost palpable. The guards stood down, Saint-Just eased back in his chair—and even Kasha allowed his rigid stance to lessen a bit. Long Feng's fingers did a little drum-dance on the cover of the dossier. Then, firmly, he pushed the entire dossier to the side of the desk.

"We'll put the whole thing aside, then. It all turned out well, obviously. Amazingly well, in fact, for an operation you had to put together on the fly. As for Doro Kim, well, I'm not going to lose any sleep over an officer who gets himself killed from an excess of ambition and stupidity."

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Toph's armies gathered. They'd trained for months, performed petty bandit raids, spread sedition, and otherwise made a nuisance of themselves for the powers that be in Ba Sing Se, but this would be the first true battle—and the decisive one, she hoped. _It _will_ be the decisive battle, one way or the other—what I _hope_ is that it's decisive in my favor._

Whichever way it went, it wasn't going to be the final battle, however—not by a long shot. Ba Sing Se was, by any measure, the most important city in the Earth Kingdom, but that didn't make _it_ the Earth Kingdom, or the Earth Kingdom it. Even ignoring the Dai Li stations scattered all over the continent, there were still going to be states loyal to the old regime, and others using the (temporary) weakness of the central government to break away. It was going to be long and bloody—perhaps it was a mistake to concentrate all of her forces on Ba Sing Se this day.

No; ultimately, victory depended on taking Ba Sing Se. Chin the Conquerer took damn near everything but…and still lost. However easier it would make things in the future for her to have taken out various strategic points in surprise attacks before they'd even realized a war was on, it would be all for nothing if the attack on Ba Sing Se failed. Worse than nothing; if the attack on Ba Sing Se failed, she would have personally signed the death warrant for all of her supporters, near enough.

Toph really wanted to launch this thing at dusk, she really, really did, but it would take a while for her forces to get into position, and she couldn't waste a single second of Sozin's Comet, so they launched a half hour beforehand. She couldn't see the sun lowering in the sky, its last rays of light reflecting off of the surface of the water and the fleet sailing across the great lake. She couldn't see the preparations for battle. But Teo could, and he was in awe of the fact that, in whatever small way, he had helped this to happen, that, in a much larger way, his father had helped to make this happen, and in awe especially of the twelve year old girl who was the fulcrum and lever of the entire thing.

"We're in position."

"Airbenders, launch! Firebenders, grab a glider and form into lines! Everyone else, secure something to a glider."

Airbenders were instilled from birth with an innate unwillingness to take a human life that Teo, though no fan of murder himself, found to be a tad extreme, but that didn't mean they couldn't be useful. Airbenders launched from the armadas taking a position in the sky and then hovering there, like they were standing on an invisible bridge leading right into Ba Sing Se. Which they weren't, of course; no, they were _forming_ an invisible bridge into Ba Sing Se, or near enough for all intents and purposes (or at least for the intents and purposes of the invaders).

The gliders that the firebenders grabbed didn't look like the airbender gliders. They followed the same basic design (though with cords to secure them to their rider about the waist and below the armpit), but were made out of a different wood and the cloth wing was green. Swamp folk made these. The ones securing other various objects—catapults, crates of barrels of blasting jelly, etcetera—were made in increasingly divergent designs; the Mechanic had really had to rack his brains with some of them, given the weights, sizes, and shapes of their cargo.

An airbender on deck made a circular sweeping motion with his arms, and a wind swept a firebender up towards the first hovering airbender in the line, who passed her on to the next, and on to the next, so on and so forth, like the world's most precarious and deadly game of catch. The defenders could do nothing; they were far out of range. Then the wind bison began lifting from the water.

"Come, Wheels; we don't want to be late." One of the bison leveled awkwardly with the ship so Teo could wheel himself aboard (Toph took advantage of this, as well, in spite of having two perfectly good legs), and then they took off. Earthbenders below them fired boulders at the large targets, but these boulders invariably fell far short of the target before falling to earth. The wind bison split into two groups; one continued into the heart of Ba Sing Se, while the other split into two more groups and traveled along the Outer Wall, their riders dumping shards of metal and glass onto the defenseless defenders. Toph and Teo's bison was in the former group.

So far, it was a cake walk. Of course it was; this was the easy part. But they'd have to close with the enemy eventually; they had only so much shrapnel to pour over the sides of their flying steeds like so much lethal confetti. For one thing, they had only so much of the deadly rain, and for another, there were civilians down there. Plus, after a while it got real inefficient, Teo would imagine; he had an absurd picture of a city buried in glass and metal, looking like a walled off mountain of dirty snow.

The first of the troops from Toph's armada were coming close to a landing, the sun was setting, and the people on the ground had to have figured out where they were going by now, in a general sense, at least. Teo hoped that their maps were completely accurate as to where the governmental, military, and police headquarters and districts were, even given the fact that if they were, that meant that Toph's army was headed directly into the jaws of the enemy.

The lines of airbenders conjoined in the sky above Ba Sing Se, and new lines came of that conjoining to the various targets—and the last couple airbender in each line would be in danger of retaliatory fire from the ground (the _last_ in each line would actually be _on_ the ground) once fully formed, as were the paratroopers they were landing. Which was where this group of flying bison came in.

Except for one, which veered off and floated near the conjunction. That bison's passengers, Teo knew, were all airbenders. Reserves. Which was sterilized military jargon for "replacements for the airbenders who die." Be prepared.

The last rays of the sun fell below the horizon, and Sozin's Comet was clearly visible in the sky. One woman stared up at it, breathed in deeply as though in appreciation of the fresh scent after a violent rainstorm, and made a sound like a cross between moaning- and sighing in pleasure. "Oh, yes; I can feel it." From this, Teo took her to be the firebender. "It sings so beautifully in my veins."

Boulders were fired from the ground as the last airbenders took their places. The firebender shot a cone of flame many dozens of feet long and maybe ten or twelve wide at the base, which knocked a rock out of the sky.

Teo was impressed; never in his life had he seen a display of firebending like it, and now these firebenders were treating it like it was nothing. And he knew, on this night, it _was_ nothing. Also, he couldn't be sure that it wasn't just the fact that this was the first time he'd seen firebending at night (they were usually stronger during the daytime), but the flame itself looked different…it looked like Sozin's Comet.

"Alright, where's the airbender?" Toph asked.

"Here," he said, as if Toph could see him.

"Alright, you know what to do; first, carry me down to the ground so that I can lead my troops…then get Wheels up to the reservist bison."

"What?" Teo sounded indignant and petulant at the same time. "You said nothing about this earlier!"

"Sorry, Teo; your father made me promise to keep you out of danger."

"I can take care of myself!"

"Your father doesn't doubt it, but still, you're his son. And, frankly, he's right not to want to see you go down there. You're not a fighter, Wheels."

"But—"

"No 'buts', Teo. My decision is final." Toph's voice brokered no argument. Then she smiled at him. "Hey, stay cool, alright?" She punched his arm, and then went over the edge with an airbender. Teo would spend the whole rest of the night worrying about her.

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_Should have kept a closer eye on Sunshine,_ Long Feng thought. _The allegiance they swore to Ba Sing Se was little more than lip service; I should have put more pressure on them._ Of course, to be fair, the allegiance ninety-five percent of the fifes swore to Ba Sing Se was little more than lip service and convenience—but ninety five percent of the Earth Kingdom didn't have firebenders. Firebenders who, for this one night, were as close to what the simple folk referred to as "gods" as made no difference.

There were waterbenders and earthbenders and non-benders in the invasion force, and airbenders escorting them over Ba Sing Se's defenses and into the heart of the city, but it was the firebenders who were truly devastating this night. Long Feng didn't know who was attacking him, but that didn't mean he wouldn't bet his life that it was Toph Bei-Fong.

By the time the enemies stormed his headquarters, he was already gone. There were secret passages honeycombing Ba Sing Se.

A large group of Dai Li were gathered in the secret underground chamber. They looked scared, tired, or angry…except for Kasha.

"Can we take this city back?" asked a random officer.

"We _will_ take the city—never doubt it for a minute," Kasha said harshly. He looked as if he believed it, and not only that, that he was willing to die to prove it. Kasha saw Long Feng, and quickly walked up to him. "Director, I've been looking over the men. We've lost twenty percent of them."

Long Feng opened his mouth to reply, but suddenly there was fire and screaming. Before he could even figure out what was going on, Kasha had taken his cue to drive an obsidian stiletto into his skull.

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**AN:** Fifthly, Kasha's storyline is veering away from his Honorverse counterpart's but I still CPE'd (Copy, Paste, & Edit) a section from _Fanatic_ (hint: it's the bit where I'm suddenly a descriptive writer). Special thanks to Deadpan for reminding me of this by pointing out my botched editing job in his review to this chapter (I went back and fixed it).


	20. Chibi Parody of Chapters 11 through 14

**AN:** So I'm suffering from the most insidious kind of writer's block of all-the kind where I have, just, an awesome idea, only it's for _something else entirely!_ Damn it, this is the reason I haven't published any original fiction-they're all literally unfinished; my brain refuses to let me finish something before demanding I start on the next thing. Anyway, I'm working on it, haven't actually slipped in my schedule yet, but it is a possibility.

The World without the War

S-Michael

Chibi Parody of:

Chapters 11 through 14

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"Let's go talk to the Council of Sisters at the Western Air Temple," Chibi Azula said.

"You can't see the Council," a random guard said. "You don't have an appointment."

"Ah, but we _do_ have an appointment," Chibi Azula said, waving her arm in front of her face.

"You do have an appointment. Go on in."

"Oh my God—you're a Jedi!" Chibi Sokka said with glee. "Just when I thought you couldn't get any _more_ awesome."

"No, airbenders are just really, really dumb," Chibi Azula said.

"We heard you say that just now," said a conveniently unnamed Chibi Sister. "Why should we help you?"

"Let me handle this," Chibi Sokka said, taking off his shirt. The sound of squee-ing came from throughout the temple. "My army of rabid fangirls command you to help us."

"It's not fair," the Sister said. "We lock them away from boys for half the year, and then _you_ show up on our doorstep. It's just not fair."

And so, with the combined powers of intimidation, plot devices, mad studying skills, and pornomancy, they managed to track down Kazane's exact location. Meanwhile, Tsubasa was slowly coming to the realization that the torture and murder of a teenage girl might not exactly be the most morally upstanding thing to do.

"Mother, I'm slowly coming to the realization that torturing and murdering a teenage girl might not be the most morally upstanding thing to do," Chibi Tsubasa said.

"Well, I suppose that you could always eat her soul. That'll kill the Avatar," Chibi Kazane said.

"Wait…what?"

"Oh, yeah, all those horror stories people told about the Empire of Clouds are true. Did I forget to mention that?"

"But…that means…we're evil."

"Well, _duh!_ What was your first clue? The plot to kill the messiah? The evil lair? The doomsday device? The tank in the basement full of sharks with freaking laser beams attached to their foreheads?"

Tsubasa stopped her. "Wait—_what_ were those last two?"

"Oh, did I forget to mention that part on the guided tour? Sorry, must have slipped my mind."

"…I'm going to go asphyxiate some small animals," Chibi Tsubasa said.

"Yes, embrace your budding psychopathy," Chibi Kazane said.

"Hey, Mom, can I borrow the key to Amy's cell?"

"Sure. Why?"

"Oh, no reason."

And so Chibi Tsubasa busted Chibi Amadahy out of jail.

"Wow—I did _not_ see that coming," Chibi Kazane said. "Well, best capture my daughter."

Meanwhile, Chibi Tsubasa had ran into her former friends.

"You betrayed us," Chibi Azula said.

"Well, I won't do it again. Trust me."

"Okay." Chibi Azula turned to the flying hoarde chasing them. "Time to kick some ass."

"No, wait!" Chibi Sokka put in. "There's no violence in chibi-land."

"No, there's just no _realistic_ violence," Chibi Azula said. "Prepare for…_tickle lightning!_"

And then they got away.

"You know, I've got the feeling that S-Michael is really just phoning this parody in," Chibi Sokka said.

Hey, I started this freaking thing as a lark and somehow got committed to doing it every 2-4 chapters when I don't even do funny, not on command, so piss off.

"Hey, you can slack off on these later, but for now you've already started writing this, so do it properly," Chibi Azula shouted at the Fourth Wall. Beat. "Also, no one talks to my boyfriend like that."

Alright, fine, Chibi Kazane ran Fluffy to ground and surrounded Chibi Team Azula, happy?

"You couldn't have let him let us go, _could_ you?" Chibi Katara demanded dryly.

"There's a right way and a wrong way to do things," Chibi Azula answered.

"I've got you surrounded," Chibi Kazane said.

"Exactly where I want you," Chibi Azula said.

"But…I've got you surrounded."

"Exactly. That means you can't get away _this_ time!

"But…"

"Look, lady, in canon, I managed to manipulate myself into control of the Dai Li and Ba Sing Se. I'm a master of this. So run along crying."

"Um…_run!_" Chibi Kazane flew away.

"Wasn't Avatar Taru supposed to make a cameo?" Chibi Amadahy asked.

"You _would_ notice that," Chibi Azula said.

"Wait, I just realized that Avatar Taru was an ancestor of yours. Does that make you part-OC?" Chibi Sokka asked his girlfriend.

"We're not related by blood. See, Taru adopted his husband's niece, who became Firelord after him…"

"Wait—I don't remember any of this from the story."

"Doesn't mean it won't be on the test."

"Test?"

Suddenly, the Fourth Wall hopped into a time machine and shot back to the night of the raid on the Glacier Plateau Raiders.

"Prepare to reap your just desserts, like the rest of your villainous kind," Chibi Usani said.

"What are you talking about, 'rest of my villainous kind'? This script is _full_ of Karma Houdinis! I mean, Tsubasa in the last scene, hello? And what about Ozai? Do you expect me to believe that one of the world's top firebenders isn't going to escape on the night of Sozin's Comet when most of the swampbenders who captured him are busy elsewhere? Ha!"

"Yes, thank you _so much_ for lampshading the sequel hook," Chibi Kasha said, annoyed.

"Well…no one's escaped from Karma while Kasha and I were on the job," Chibi Usani said.

"Oh, so you're going to go after Wakaun and Hahn after you're done with me?"

"…Shut up."

"Well, how're you going to do it? No one dies in chibi-land, remember?"

"We'll say what the author has been avoiding for nine paragraphs…'Chibi Doro Kim'." The collective balking of a million readers (HA! I _wish_ I had that many!) upon reading those words caused a tear in the fabric of reality which Chibi Usani then pushed him out of. "Who'da thunk the ocean of text was a plot device?"

"Neat trick. But what am I going to do when it's time for me to kill Long Feng?"

"Oh, crap—we've got to abort this parody before the paradox causes chibi-land to implode! Tear down the Fourth Wall!"

"Can we do that?"

"Sure, the abuse it's been getting lately has _got_ to have left it structurally in a state of shambles," Chibi Usani said. "Earthbend in three…two…one…now!"

And they—


	21. Ch 15: Zhou's Plan Revealed

**AN:** Well, made it again. In spite of how it may be starting to look, I'm not making these writer's blocks up just to ratchet up the drama, I assure you.

PS: Have you noticed how every major arch of this story involved someone getting kidnapped? That is not about to change.

The World without the War

S-Michael

Chapter 15:

In Which Toph Rules (or Tries to) and Zhou's Plan is Revealed At Last

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Ilmarinen stared up at Sozin's Comet as though entranced. "I'm a creature of fire, you know," he said to Piandao "Fire is in my blood—literally. And so it calls to me. You don't understand how the comet sings, how it calls and demands that its power be used. The only thing is, however…" Piandao had seen plenty of firebenders fight, had fought some himself, in fact, and so knew that, from the motion Ilmarinen did next, a fireball should have fired at Piandao—who dodged aside out of naked instinct before he could even think. Ilmarinen grinned softly. "Not a firebender, remember? That's the thing I'm saying—I feel the comet call to me, but I have no release." He went back to staring at Sozin's Comet. "Still, all the same, it's a pity to think I'll never see it again."

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Azula pushed with truly epic jets of flame. In fact, Sokka was worried that they were leaving a trail by melting the sand into glass.

Sokka sat as close to her as the flame would allow. "How long can you keep this up?" he asked.

"This? This is noting. I can keep this up forever and ever. It's a pity you're no firebender yourself, Sokka; you have no idea how this feels."

"It's certainly an awe-inspiring sight." Her fire looked different, somehow. It was still blue, but in the heart of it, there was a ghost of a hint of the comet's tail. Perhaps it was just a trick of the light—the only sources of illumination being Azula's fire and the comet itself—or perhaps not.

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"So I hear you took on the entire Dai Li singlehandedly, you reckless lunatic," Toph teased.

Kasha blushed. "That's an exaggeration. I left a trail for our army to follow to find the underground lair—" he paused and frowned, then nodded, for a _lair_ it was, in spite of never having been called that before "—and then found some excuse to be close to Long Feng when we were discovered. I then took advantage of the confusion of the ambush to assassinate Long Feng, and everything after that was strictly self-defense. I probably only killed seven or eight people last night." He honestly didn't know what the big deal was—he probably had the smallest kill count of any non-airbender in Toph's attack, after all.

Toph chuckled, then wondered what she was becoming that she could laugh at people dying, however indirectly. _I'm becoming grown up,_ she decided. "You are truly too much…Lieutenant Kasha, was it?"

"Captain. I got a promotion out of the Saibei affair," Kasha said.

Toph laughed. "No way. You're going to have to tell me about it sometime, Major Kasha." Then she sobered up. "The Dai Li are disbanded, of course—I prefer my spies and my police to be two separate entities, please-and-thank-you—but you can keep the rank when you transfer to whichever branch you see fit."

"Wherever Usani ends up, I'd like to serve under her," Kasha said.

_Oh, my…what is this feeling my earthbending-senses are detecting?_ Toph thought snarkily, then mentally shrugged; if the boy wanted to have a crush on a woman old enough to be his mother, that was no business of hers. "That shouldn't be a problem."

Kasha bowed and left.

The battle was won, but the war was just beginning. First, they were going to have to establish control of the Central State—which shouldn't be hard, considering that nearly ninety percent of the population lived in Ba Sing Se proper. Then, she'd have to go on the offensive, striking at strategic points. It was a conflict likely to smolder for decades.

And in the meantime, she had to actually _rule_. To run and properly govern the city of Ba Sing Se—and the Earth Kingdom (however much of it she was actually ruling at any given time). To keep the rails running on time, not to mention keeping the garbage collectors, road sweepers, aqueduct cleaners, and all the various other civil servants toiling in anonymity without whom Ba Sing Se would collapse in a heap of its own filth doing their jobs, in spite of whatever world-shattering changes were happening at the top. It was…a tall order.

Teo wheeled in. "T—er, Your Majesty—"

"Please, 'Toph,'" Toph said. "I'm still Toph, you know.

"Right, then, Toph," Teo said to the Earth Queen. "I just wanted to go over your speech one more time."

"Don't worry, Wheels, I've got it memorized. Besides, we don't have time."

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Piandao and Ilmarinen walked into the courtyard of Piandao's manor to find a man waiting for them. "How did you get in?" Piandao demanded.

Zhou grinned, and bowed to the two men. "Greetings, Sword Master Piandao…Phoenix Ilmarinen."

Ilmarinen looked at him, consideringly. "If you know my title, you must be aware of how truly out of your depths you are."

"I know that the Phoenix is about to be reborn, and I know that there is a ritual that will allow me to consume it once it makes a pyre of your body. Granted, living for a thousand years won't be the same thing as true immortality, but it's nothing to sneeze at, either."

Ilmarinen grinned darkly. "So you would take the Phoenix's power for yourself. And then what? World domination? The first of my predecessors tried that, and got bored after a few centuries. Granted, it wasn't truly _world_ domination, but she did pretty good for a woman living in a time when a copper sword was a newfangled and futuristic weapon."

"So what are you afraid of, then?"

Ilmarinen chuckled. "Sorry, but I've already got my heir picked out." He grinned. "I've got the reputation of the Phoenix to think about, you know, so I picked someone who could uphold the image I'm trying to project. You understand."

There was amusement in Zhou's expression, and he bared his teeth, but it couldn't really be called a smile. "I did not come all this way to ask politely."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever; let's just get this over with," Ilmarinen said, lazily making a "get on with the point" gesture with his hand.

Zhou lashed out at Ilmarinen with a whip of flame, and Ilmarinen chuckled. The thing about living for a thousand years with the ability to laugh off all injuries that could ever possibly be inflicted on one (presumably short of bodily destruction, though of course Ilmarinen had never tested it) is that one acquires a lot of bad habits. Ilmarinen was, in a very real way, made of fire, which required that he be immune to fire, which in turn meant that he had long since stopped seeing firebenders as a serious threat. Which is why, with hubris constantly reinforced by the experience over more than half a dozen lifetimes, Ilmarinen did not bother to dodge Zhou's attack; after all, he'd faced much more impressive displays of fire before, and never walked away with anything more than burned clothes and ash on his skin.

Ilmarinen quickly came to regret his decision. The fire whip did not sear or burn his flesh any more than he expected it to, but it hit with a physical force behind it, a weight. It wrapped itself around him like a boa-python, and before the sentence _I am a fucking idiot_ could fully coalesce in his brain, he found he couldn't move.

Piandao drew his sword, and Zhou shot a fireball at him. Piandao dodged and rolled to the side; behind where he had been standing, the mansion didn't catch on fire, but only because the fireball passed through it too quickly, cutting through stone walls like a knife through warm butter. (Zhou frowned: _I really need to cut back on the power._) Piandao saw the hole (and the landscape beyond), and paused in awe for a moment, which was nearly fatal as Zhou shot again. Piandao weaved to the side, charging Zhou with his sword. Zhou realized that anyone Ilmarinen chose to be the next Phoenix wasn't going to be a pushover, and further that he wasn't going to be at the top of his game while keeping part of his mind on said Phoenix, so he blasted off. Perhaps Piandao would die in the heat wave coming off his rocketing flame, or perhaps not, but either way, he'd be eating Zhou's dust.

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"Flying is easy," Tsubasa said. "Just…you know…_fly._"

"You are the worst airbending instructor _ever,_" Amadahy said.

"Here, just watch me." Tsubasa jumped into the air and did a few loop-de-loops. Katara had wondered if teaching Amadahy airbending when she didn't even have an earthbending instructor yet was proper; Tsubasa's response had been _Fuck the rules._

She landed and tossed the glider to Amadahy, who tried awkwardly to hold the thing behind her. "No, no, you're doing it wrong." Tsubasa walked up to her, grabbed the glider, and manually moved Amadahy's hands to their proper position.

"You know, I noticed something," Amadahy said.

"Yeah, what?"

"You complain a lot."

"Wow, your powers of deduction are amazing," Tsubasa said sarcastically. Then, unrelatedly: "Damn it, Amy are _trying_ to mess the hold up?"

"Yeah, yeah, but what's interesting is what you _don't_ complain about."

"Oh? And what would that be?"

"The sleeping arrangements we had aboard Fluffy," Amadahy said.

"Hey, I'm the one who made Ty Lee make Fluffy travel by day so that we wouldn't have to sleep at night aboard Tulu's own animate flying hairball," Tsubasa complained.

"And that was about the time I showed up, making it physically impossible for all of us to fit, right? But back in the desert when Azula was firebending us out of there, you had no problem getting all cozy between me and Ty Lee."

"Just what are you implying?" Tsubasa demanded darkly.

To answer, Amadahy grinned, and then kissed her.

Tsubasa, shocked, fell on her ass. She stared up at Amadahy, and touched her lips; she could feel them tingling, and her heart pounding. "Just what are you trying to pull?"

"Putting the moves on you, duh. You're not usually this dense," Amadahy observed.

"You've got some sort of late-onset Stockholm Syndrome or something?"

"I don't think that that works that way," Amadahy said. "Want to get off the ground, at least, if you're going to bicker with me? This is kind of ridiculous."

Tsubasa got up and dusted her pants off. "You never said you were a lesbian."

"You never asked."

"Well…uh…well."

"Ugh," Amadahy rolled her eyes. "Don't tell me you're in the closet? That's _so_ annoying."

"No, I—hey!" Tsubasa paused, realizing that that didn't sound particularly uncloseted. "No, I'm not in the closet. I just don't talk about it much." Then: "Besides, I kidnapped you, remember? And you're trying to get in my pants? What kind of crazy person are you?"

"Wow, you are _really_ not good at this, are you?" Amadahy said.

Tsubasa sighed. "Yeah, not until I've had a few drinks in me at the local girl bar."

"Ah, I see. Well, maybe when you get tired of trying to teach me to fly, _I_ can teach _you_ to fly."

Tsubasa stared at her, and said: "If this is some sort of trick to get back at me for the whole, you know, kidnapping thing, well, I probably deserve it, but that doesn't mean I'm not going to kill you."

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Piandao approached the Grand Master of the Order of the White Lotus…Firelord Iroh. Iroh poured some tea. "Shocked to discover the Grand Master's true identity?" he asked.

"Actually, Ilmarinen told me," Piandao said.

The Grand Master raised an eyebrow. "'Ilmarinen'…there's a name I haven't heard in many decades. How is the old guy?"

"Your Majesty…how much did he ever tell you about who and what he was, and why he formed the Order?"

The corners of Iroh's mouth turned upward, momentarily. "You're just going to have to tell me your story and assume that I know enough that I won't immediately think you're crazy."

Piandao did so, and Iroh listened to the incredible story. Then he sat back and frowned in thought. Piandao waited patiently, wondering if the Grand Master believed him.

"It's not that I don't believe you, but I can't use my position as Firelord to help you," Iroh said.

"What? But what if the kidnapper succeeds? He could set himself up for a thousand-year global empire. Or, worse, if he _fails_, the Phoenix could be set free, and (and I say this without a drop of hyperbole) _that_ would lead to the end of civilization itself."

"Firstly, even if I had a suspect, what could I do, without proof? Ours is a nation governed by the rule of law, not some Earth Kingdom satrapy where 'enemies of the state' can be disappeared in the middle of the night with no one the wiser for it. Secondly, I haven't _got_ a suspect. And I can't just go around rounding up powerful firebenders, because of the whole rule of law thing, but also because, thirdly, the whole of civilized life depends on the fact that most people don't know how fragile the balance truly is. We simply cannot tell people that, every thousand years, we come to the razor edge, where the slightest misstep could spell doom for us all."

Iroh shook his head. "No. We need to wait for the Avatar. She can find Ilmarinen, even if it means talking to Koh the Face Stealer. She can go anywhere, she has international jurisdiction, and, frankly, even though it gives many of our lawyers and law-and-order types ulcers to admit it, she is, in fact, above the law."

Iroh sighed. "I've never been a fan of the fact, really, as I think it has unfortunate implications by the barrel load, not the least of which the fact that it evolved out of the fact that the Avatar was powerful enough to be _effectively_ above the law, no matter what we said, nor the idea that it's alright to look to some higher power for moral guidance instead of looking at one's own heart, but none of the Avatars I've met have abused their status." Of course, that list had only two names on it, and the second had barely been Avatar long enough to do _anything_ with the status.

"The point is, though, that the Avatar will have to handle this," Iroh continued. "Preparations will have to be made. You're going to have to go with her, given that you're Ilmarinen's chosen heir, and conditions are already pretty tight on Fluffy, I hear, so we're going to need to purchase another wind bison from somewhere. I'm going to look into this and some other things; in the mean time, I'll have a room set up for you."

Iroh left, told a servant to set up a guest room for Piandao, and headed for the library. He'd told the sword master that he had no suspects, and technically that was true, but that didn't mean he had no suspicions.

He remembered the suspicious story and nature of Kai's Pendant. That Kai had gotten it from Koh, who had betrayed him by making the spirits it controlled uncontrollable. Koh was a very scary and powerful spirit, and an enemy of the Avatar, and so lots of people could believe almost anything of him—Iroh had come across stories where Koh had plans ranging from world domination to wiping out the human species—but Iroh's reading of the facts painted a different picture.

Iroh hadn't of heard of Koh dealing with physical objects before, and if he had given Kai his Pendant, he wouldn't have sabotaged it. There was nothing in doing so for Koh, and if Koh got a reputation for treachery, that would mean fewer people would come to him in desperate need for advice, and _that_ would mean fewer faces to steal. Bad for business, in other words, and as far as Iroh could tell, stealing faces was all Koh cared about (Iroh suspected that if he knew _why_ Koh stole faces, he'd know more about how the Greater Spirits think than he'd ever care to).

Besides, the whole story of Kai's Pendant was just too…neat. It was a tidy little bundle, and reality didn't work like that—reality was chaotic, messy, and nonsensical. Iroh didn't know what that could have to do with this, but he sensed something, and it seemed awfully coincidental that Ilmarinen was kidnapped a few days after the Pendant was destroyed.

An idea struck Iroh as he placed his hand on the library door, about to pull it open. He ought to send a sketch artist to get Piandao's description of the kidnapper. Perhaps he could show it around the library, to see if anyone could remember seeing him there…

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**AN:** It occurred to me a while back that there was a serious problem with this story…namely, that there weren't enough lesbians. Granted, the only show out there with the proper lesbian-to-non-lesbian ratio is _The L Word_ (and that show really went downhill around season 5, IMO), but still, this story had zero (jokes about Ty Lee don't count), and needed more.

So who was to be subject to my ability to change their sexual orientation on a whim? (That would make an awesome power to have in real life, actually: first, I'd make all Fundies gay (not that that would necessarily stop them, unfortunately), and then I'd make all the really butch lesbians and really flaming gay guys straight so as to ruin forever the concept of gender roles…God, that would be awesome!)

Ty Lee and Katara? Not that I wasn't tempted, but they've both had canonical interest in guys, and I didn't want to have to deviate from canon farther than necessary in this story. (I suppose they could be bi, but I really don't want to be _that guy._) Tsubasa? Unfortunate Implications, given that she was about to be revealed as the Mole (though, admittedly that's only if she's the _only_ lesbian). Amadahy and Katara? Well, there would be the whole soul mate angle, but I don't really do soul mates, and there's the same problem as above, plus the fact that that would mean that there has been not one Avatar—not _one_—to have expressly have an interest in guys. So, if Amy was gay, Taru had to be gay, too, so as to avoid at least _inevitably_ questioning Kyoshi's and Yang Chen's sexualities. (Azula, of course, is straight as a razor blade, and will never be anything else in any story _I_ write.)

Long story short, I decided to make Amy and Tsu lesbians, and then went back and deleted a bit I had written about Tsubasa drooling over Zuko along with Katara, and then hope that I hadn't written anything earlier about Tsu being expressly interested in guys (the chibis don't count).


	22. Ch 16: Zhou is Investigated

**AN:** So, the dreaded Schedule Slip finally happened. Sorry. Also, I forgot to mention this last chapter, but we reached another arbitrary road mark; 60k words.

The World without the War

S-Michael

Chapter 16:

In Which Zhou is Investigated, and Amadahy and Tsubasa Go On a Date

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The flying bison landed, and Azula hopped down to greet her uncle and brother. "Zhou's up to something!" she and Iroh said simultaneously. "What?"

"You go first," Iroh said.

"Amy communed with Avatar Aang while she was being kidnapped, who said that there's no such thing as Kai's pendant and that the spirits were being summoned," Azula said.

"Hmm, yes. We're thinking that it was some sort of power amplifier that needed to be fully charged," Iroh said. He nodded to Piandao, "This man came to me through…channels that I trust, talking of being attacked a firebender with ridiculous power. The description matched Zhou." The others had climbed down. "I see you rescued the Avatar. Thank goodness." He made introductions, then allowed Piandao to tell his story.

_Where to start?_ "Several months ago, I met a man named Ilmarinen, who claimed to want to learn to be a great swordsman and blacksmith. Ilmarinen seemed to be incompetent at first, though I later learned that this was an act."

Piandao chuckled, remembering one particular instance where Ilmarinen had straddled the anvil in a particularly awkward manner. _So, what, you're going to protect the dirt floor from sparks by interposing your stainless steel scrotum?_ Piandao had mocked his then-student; it never would have occurred to him that anyone would do such a thing on purpose, but then, it never would have occurred to him that anyone could be immune to fire.

"He revealed to me that he wasn't as young or inexperienced as he'd seemed…and, in some sense, wasn't a man at all," Piandao continued. As he was explaining his story, he recalled the way Ilmarinen had described the story of the Phoenix…

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_They were sitting cross-legged on the roof of Piandao's mansion. "People these days speak of the Avatar, the Avatar Spirit, and the World Spirit as though they were forces for good," Ilmarinen said. "To be fair, I suppose that the most recent Avatars _have_ been, since the Avatar Spirit gained enough humanity to figure out what these silly concepts like 'compassion' and 'empathy' mean (though Kuruk was a lazy bastard), but this was not always the case._

"_If you study the things that live on this world, you notice things. Some animals have an actual sense of morality, though usually cruder than humans'…well, most humans, and work together, but far more often animals and even plants kill each other, either to eat them outright, or in a struggle for resources. That's what life is, when you get down to it: struggle. Even when creatures have morality, it's _always_ myopic to some degree or other._

"_Think about it; I'm not disparaging your righteousness or anything, but do you honestly care about everyone on this world? _Everyone? Every. Last. Person?_ And let's not go into the animals and plants and things. Truthfully, in moderation—in _moderation,_ mind—moral myopia is a good thing—it keeps you sane, stops you from crying your eyes out every night over the fates of some peasants in some of the worst Earth Kingdom fifes or a Northern Water Tribe girl forced to marry some guy twice her age, let alone the million and nine things the lower animals do to one another. Seriously, you do _not_ want to know how some of these insects live._

"_I'm not trying to convince you that bad is good or good is bad or anything; we make our own morality, after all. I'm just saying, given this, what do you imagine that the World Spirit, a sort of inverted-avatar of all life on Earth, is going to be like? Two words: not nice."_

"_What does all of this have to do with the Phoenix?" Piandao asked._

"_Excellent question; I'll get around to that," Ilmarinen said. "See, the thing is, the Avatar is not the only avatar of the World Spirit. Before the World Spirit had taken much notice of humanity's very existence, it had created other avatars, animal-form and eternal. The Four Beasts of the Elements: Behemoth, Leviathan, Ziz…Phoenix. Or rather, their version of the Avatar Spirit, which then created them; that bit will be important later."_

"_So you're an Avatar?" Piandao asked._

"_Not the kind of avatar that has a 'the' in front of it, and it's not so much 'me' as 'the thing inside me,' let's get that straight," Ilmarinen said. "Still we are…related, I guess you'd say. But, in a way, isn't everyone—and every_thing_ to have ever lived—related to the Avatar? The World Spirit is the spirit of the _world_ after all, even if I've got a more direct line to it than most non-Avatars._

"_Anyway, once every thousand years the Phoenix would build itself a pyre and be reborn in its ashes. The woman who would go on to be the first of my kind received a prophesy from a powerful seer—her sister—who saw when Phoenix would be weak, and that if one could consume it, one could absorb most of its powers."_

"_You can't breathe fire," Piandao pointed out._

"_I said most. Quite frankly, the whole pseudo-immortality thing alone is well worth the price of admission," Ilmarinen said, then continued where he'd left off:_

"_I'm not going to pretend that she had altruistic motives—in fact, I'll straight-up tell you that all she was after was power, and the fact that the world was better off for what she did was purest accident—but she _did_ change the world for the better; I don't know if the other Beasts had any similar times of weakness, but, as they say, a chain is only as strong as its weakest link. And 'chain' is a very good metaphor._

"_See, the 'logic of the Elemental Beasts' is similar to the 'logic of the Avatar.' Four elements representing the four seasons—fire for summer, earth for fall, water for winter, air for spring, and yes, this is a 'temperate climate bias', but two thirds of the world is temperate—and all of them interconnected. You literally cannot have _one_ Elemental Beast without the others, but they cannot die, either, and so when Phoenix was…indisposed…they fell into a slumber. 'That is not dead which can eternal lie,' and suchlike._

"_What I'm telling you is that, if Phoenix were ever to escape, to be reborn for real, the other Beasts would awaken, as well; Behemoth would crawl from the bowels of the Earth, Leviathan would rise from R'lyeh, and Ziz would…come from wherever air-based Eldritch Horrors stereotypically come from. Leng, I guess. And they would proceed to destroy civilization—not out of spite or malice, but simply because their brains are about the size of walnuts and that's the only way in which they can interact with us._

"_And the reason I'm telling you _that_ is so you know what's at stake here. See, I have to have an heir. If an evildoer takes my power, they can rule the world for a thousand years, and that would be very bad, but what would be infinitely worse would be if the next Phoenix escapes. A person can change over the course of a millennium, after all, but the Beasts never do."_

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"Don't you need a warrant for this?" Azula asked a policewoman.

"_We_ would, but _she_—" the officer pointed at the Avatar "—does not. We're going in with her, as part of a joint operation."

"Nice legalese; I'm surprised you could say it with a straight face," Azula said to the officer and her partner.

"Aw, what, you don't like your constables playing fast and loose with the rules?" Tsubasa mocked. "I kind of wish you had a war; I'd love to see how long it would take the holier-than-thou Fire Nation to start shedding its precious 'individual civil liberties' like a smugglers tossing cargo over the side of the boat before the navy catches them."

Azula looked at Amadahy. "You _like_ her?"

"What? She's funny," Tsubasa said.

The first cop's partner rubbed his chin. "Aren't you Water Tribe? I thought that they were…uh, you know…" he said to Amadahy.

"Sexist and homophobic?" Tsubasa asked. "No, see, Tsu comes from a lost tribe from some Earth Kingdom swamp, and they're apparently the most enlightened, smartest, least horrible waterbenders around—which, granted, is hardly a high hurdle to overcome, but still."

"Hey, we're not _that_ bad at the South," Katara said.

"You're less horrible than the Northern Water Tribe, congratulations. And a punch in the face is less painful than a no holds barred beat down. You're still less rational and enlightened than a bunch of peasants living in a swamp," Tsubasa said.

"Why are we standing out here talking about me instead of going in there and looking for evidence?" Amadahy asked.

"Technically, this is your investigation; _you_ have to give the order to go," the female cop answered.

"Oh. Well, let's go," Amadahy said.

So they jimmied the lock and entered Zhou's house.

"Let's split up," Azula said, heading in the general direction of the chimney. Sokka, Tsubasa, and Amadahy followed her. Soon they found the fireplace; Azula squatted in front of it and frowned: "He cleaned out the ashes," she said, running her finger through soot. "Paranoid. This is bad."

"Don't tell me you can't find some clue," Tsubasa said. "I mean, come on, you found me."

"This is different," Azula said. "Zhou needs to keep his captive from cutting himself, but other than that? Ilmarinen doesn't need to eat, or even breathe. If I were Zhou, I'd toss him into a mold, cast some iron statue or something around him, and then stash him in a safe place and spend the next few months working on my tan."

Tsubasa shuddered at the imagery of this Ilmarinen person spending months in darkness, unable to see, to move, to _breathe_… "That is truly sick."

"Maybe he'll have forgotten something," Azula ignored her. "After all, even if he's some sort of genius, that doesn't mean he can't make mistakes. And even if he didn't, that doesn't mean we can't learn something here."

Azula stretched and began looking around the room. Spartan, utilitarian. It didn't look like he spent a lot of time here, at all. This was the house of a career military officer. The other rooms were much of the same. The records said that Zhou was unmarried; it didn't look like he'd ever had a girlfriend.

"Here's what I want to know: How did he know?" Sokka said. "About Phoenix Ilmarinen, about whatever Kai's Pendant really was, about whatever magic he used to sic those spirits on people—all that information had to come from somewhere, you know. So where?"

"Hm, yes, that's a very good question, Sokka," Azula said absent-mindedly. Then, just to prove she'd been listening, she added: "Truthfully, I have no idea where he'd get the knowledge to hoodwink the Royal Librarians." More whimsically: "Perhaps he's found the Library of Wan Shi Tong?"

"The library of what, now?" Amadahy asked.

"Once upon a time there was a spirit named Wan Shi Tong, who had a library," Tsubasa explained. "This library contained knowledge from all over the world and all throughout time, but then Wan Shi Tong decided that humans are bastards on account of our wars and deforestation and other such hippie bullshit, so he went and removed it from the world, or hid it, or something."

"Er, yes, that," Azula said, still paying more attention to her surroundings than the conversation.

Sokka rubbed his chin. "You know, if I had something I wanted to keep safe and hidden, and knew where the Library of Wan Shi Tong was, that's where I'd keep it."

They entered Zhou's study, and Azula immediately headed towards the desk and pulled out two drawers, laying them on top. She snorted in amusement; "Well, I'll be; one's shorter than the other. You know what that means, Sokka?"

"Yes—_we're in the House of Leaves!_"

"…Actually, it means that there's a secret compartment in here," Azula said.

"That's what the house _wants_ you to think! We need to get out of here before it starts toying with our sanity!"

"I think it's already started with you," Tsubasa snarked.

Azula was looking inside the desk. "Here it is…empty; I thought as much."

There was a moment of silence, and then Tsubasa said, "Well, go on."

"Go on?" Azula asked.

"Yeah, go on and tell us how this means that he kept secrets here, which we can use to, I don't know, something," Tsubasa said.

"It means he put _something_ to paper he didn't want anyone to find—the fake records from the Royal Library, perhaps, though I'd have done that somewhere with better facilities for forging records."

"So that means…?"

"Fucked if I know," Azula said. "Maybe putting his plans down in paint and paper helped him to examine them for glaring holes." She shrugged.

"So, assuming we don't find anything, like, say, a map to Zhou's location with 'Here I am, suckers!' scrawled across it, where do we go from here?" Sokka asked.

"Find some place charged with spiritual energy so Amy can talk with her past incarnations is what I've been thinking," Azula said. "After all, Avatar Aang seems to have been on the ball this entire time."

"Yeah, how does that work, exactly?" Amadahy asked. "I mean, is his spirit out and about, doing stuff and observing the world and whatnot? How can he do that if he's me?" No one had a good explanation for that.

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"C'mon, I wanna see the greatest city in the world," Amadahy had said.

"Azula's a bit biased when she calls it that," Tsubasa had grumbled.

"All the more reason to see if it's true or not before we end up going to the land of the ice and snow," Amadahy had said, and so they'd gone down to see Mount Royal Palace City.

The city was named after Mount Royal Palace, which was, of course, named after the royal palace at its summit. (The royal palace had been renovated several times over the centuries, but had originally been handed down to the Fire Nation from the Empire of Clouds; Taru hadn't felt like leaving home, Tsubasa guessed.) Tsubasa was actually kind of surprised that the city hadn't been named Mount Royal Palace Port City, for a clean sweep.

Amadahy, who had never seen a real city before leaving the swamp, was positively slack-jawed. Tsubasa couldn't help but to upturn the corners of her mouth a little bit at that; it was…cute. "It's okay to smile, and break your misanthropic persona" Amadahy said when she caught sight of Tsubasa's expression.

They entered a restaurant and grabbed a table. A waiter came up to them: "Evening ladies. May I take your order?" Having noticed Tsubasa's airbender garb, he turned to her and added, "May I presume that you'll be having the vegetable platter?"

"No, I want steak. Bloody freaking steak. In fact, you know that thing where the steak is black on the outside and barely even warm in the middle—you know, on purpose—and they cook the mushrooms in the steak juice and then put them on top? I want that," Tsubasa said.

"I'll have fish," Amadahy added. "I don't know what any of the local fishes taste like, though, so surprise me. Just don't cook it with a lot of spices, like you people love to do. Oh, and I want a side of fried crickets."

"…Fried crickets, ma'am?"

"Yeah, fried crickets. Put a pan on the fire, butter it, dump about a double-handful of crickets in there, and fry 'em. Salt 'em, too, maybe, as you flip 'em."

"I, uh, do not believe we have crickets on the premises," the waiter said apologetically.

"Well, do the best you can," Amadahy said.

"I'll see what I can do. Would you ladies like wine with that?"

"Have you had wine before, Amy?" Tsubasa asked. Amadahy shook her head. "You probably won't like it then, it takes some getting used to. Water, please." The waiter bowed out.

"So, badly-cooked steak?" Amadahy asked.

"Hey, there are some advantages to being outcast," Tsubasa said. "Of course, eating meat and not shaving my forehead are about the only two I can think of. Also, you shouldn't talk. Crickets? Ick!"

"Have you ever tried fried crickets?" Amadahy asked.

"No," Tsubasa admitted.

"Well, then, don't knock it until you've tried it," Amadahy said, winning the fight.

The waiter returned with their water, assured them that their food would be arriving shortly (and sadly, no, there were no crickets on the premises), and left. Amadahy grabbed their waters and chilled them to the point where they were skimming over with ice.

"Neat trick," Tsubasa said.

Amadahy shrugged. "Thought it would go better with hot food."

Tsubasa smiled, and said: "I hope you know what you're doing here, because I've got no idea."

"It's one of those silly human mating rituals. On the first date, we try and impress each other with our awesomeness, then on the second date onwards, we slowly reveal the less impressive facts about ourselves, and hopefully we're too invested in each other to break it off once it's revealed that we've got missing teeth and gout."

Tsubasa laughed, but Amadahy wasn't done: "Then we move into a house together and make a bunch of babies. Also, there's something about a ring in there somewhere, but that's not important."

"Now _that_ would be a neat trick!" Tsubasa said. "Us having kids together."

"Yeah, we'd have to adopt, but we'd better get off of that subject before we end up scaring ourselves," Amadahy said.

"So, you ever been on a date before?"

"Wow, straight from one dangerous subject to another—you don't fuck around, do you?" Amadahy commented. "Yeah, a few of times. With a couple of girls…and a couple of boys."

"Hmm? I thought you said you were never in the closet?"

"I wasn't."

"So you…?"

"Like both," Amadahy said, deathly serious. "I'm bisexual." She looked at Tsubasa challengingly.

"I take it any comments on my part about how gross that is will be met with hostility," Tsubasa said dryly.

"Yeah, something like that."

"Well, I'll try not to, but I've got to tell you that sensitivity isn't exactly my strong point."

Amadahy chuckled. "Yeah, I've noticed."

"Also, the thought of copulating with one of those 'male' things leaves me sick to my stomach. I mean, ugh; I really don't see how anyone does it."

"I'm just wired differently than you; sorry."

"Yeah, well, I suppose I'll just have to look past that," Tsubasa said with a self-deprecating sort of mock-haughtiness. "At least you have the good sense to be currently dating a woman."

Amadahy grinned: "And your opinion on that matter is totally unbiased, isn't it?"

"Naturally," Tsubasa said with her nose in the air.

The food came, and they began to eat their meals.

"Anyway, it's my turn to dig inappropriately, so why don't you tell me about your childhood?"

"What's there to tell? The Sisters of the Western Air Temple told me to respect all life, Mother told me that they were weak-willed fools and had me learn ancient Domination techniques. I'd lived a double-life since I could talk. Then I got caught voidbending by someone who actually knew what domination-airbending looked like, and was taken before the Sisters. I decided to try to convince them of the righteousness of my cause, with predictably horrid results…"


	23. Ch 17: The Avatar Requires Advice

**AN:** …I'm _baaack_. Sorry about that months-long hiatus—is anyone still reading this? Hope I didn't lose all of my readers. Ah, well, it's my own damn fault. I guess we can safely say that _that_ was the mother of all schedule slips; in fact, the schedule slipped, fell, and is dead; what I'm saying is, I've got zero cushion and no idea when I'll be publishing the next chapter (I'll try and get it to you within a week).

You know, the story was actually going good, and then I went on a two week vacation, and when I got back, suddenly I couldn't force myself to get back to it for love nor money (well, for love; it's not like I'm actually getting paid for this shit). Well, I re-read the story so far to make sure that I still knew where it was going (and boy, is it as obvious to y'all as it is to me that I don't proofread this thing?) and in spite of my ADD and having the memory of a goldfish, I did (or at least everything I thought I was doing meshed up plausibly with what came so far). It helps that I never had more than a vague idea of where the plot was going to go ahead of time; I write by the seat of my pants.

Yeah, Tsu and Amy's lesbianism is far from the only thing I pulled out of my ass; I've basically been making this whole thing up as I go along, and when I say that, I mean "the only thing I knew going into it was that Zhou wanted to charge a trinket for super firebending powers, Azula wants to find the Avatar, and Sokka and Azula will bone." Literally.

_[/overlong author's note]_

The World without the War

S-Michael

Chapter 17:

In Which the Avatar Requires Advice

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"…I decided to try to convince them of the righteousness of my cause, with predictably horrid results. So I was banished, and Mother decided to make lemons into lemonade, and sent me to Omashu and hang out with King Bumi so that I could be on the spot when the Avatar appeared, figuring that one of Avatar Aang's best friends who also happened to be one of the greatest earthbenders in the world was the most logical person to train the next Avatar in earthbending. And so I spent the last three years waiting for the Avatar to appear. Nothing much to talk about, really."

"Quite," Amadahy said dryly. The conversation turned to small talk after that, and eventually, the meal was done, and they paid and left.

"Quite a long walk back up to the royal palace," Amadahy said.

"Screw that," Tsubasa said, grabbing her glider from the coat room. "Walking is for losers. We're flying."

Amadahy grinned. "You just want me to have to cuddle against you, don't you?"

"Not 'just,'" Tsubasa protested.

Amadahy wrapped her arms around Tsubasa, who jumped into the air and unfurled her glider. Tsubasa flew. They landed on the balcony outside of Amadahy's room.

"Well, this is your stop," Tsubasa said.

Amadahy let go of her, but grabbed her arm before she could take off again. "Where do you think _you're_ going?" she asked.

"But…we have to get aboard Fluffy in a couple hours."

"That's a couple hours from now," Amadahy grinned. "This is the last couple hours of privacy we're going to have for days and days, and _I_ intend to take ruthless advantage of it."

Tsubasa swallowed. "Okay," she said breathily, and entered Amadahy's room.

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Fluffy and the other air bison (whom Ty Lee had dubbed Marshmallow) were getting along fine. Their supplies were loaded, and the sun was approaching the western horizon, giving the world a hued tint.

"Where the hell are Amy and Tsu?" Azula demanded.

A figure approached. "Oh, good; I was worried that I was going to be late," said Prince Zuko.

"You're coming with us?" Mai asked. A lifetime of conditioning warred with the strong desire to run to him, crush him in her arms, and devour his face (preferably with a disgustingly high-pitched squeal), manifesting as a slight tremble in her limbs, what was for her a dopey grin, and a hopeful pitch of voice.

"Oh, gee, I don't know—stay at home and learn the finer points of floral arrangement, or go _actually spend time with my girlfriend_—gee, what should I do?" Zuko asked sarcastically. "Also, all that stuff about saving the world and whatnot, but it's a distant second."

"Oh, I'm sure," Mai said dryly, and kissed him.

"I also wouldn't miss seeing my children off on their grand adventure," Ursa chose that moment to speak up, thoroughly embarrassing Mai down to her toes.

"So, uh, you're Azula's mom? Princess Ursa, I mean. Not that she has any other mothers. Er…" Sokka said awkwardly, rubbing the back of his head.

Katara whispered out of the corner of her mouth. "Psst. Put your tongue back in your mouth."

"Hey, are you seeing what I'm seeing?" Sokka whispered back. "I mean, come _on!_ The woman isn't sex on wheels—she's sex on _sex_."

"I'm standing right here," Azula said frostily from his other side.

"…I'm in trouble, aren't I?"

"We'll discuss it later."

With what Mai was sure was malicious intent to see how much trouble she could get Sokka in and see if she could make him melt as a bonus, Ursa beamed at him. "You must be Sokka. Azula's told me so much about you."

"I…uh…yeah…"

Tsubasa and Amadahy jogged into view. "Sorry we're late," Tsubasa apologized. "We had to stop at Amy's room for…ah, none of your fucking business."

Not that it was much of a mystery. "You two are looking rather disheveled," Zuko pointed out, causing the two to smooth out their hair and clothes as best as they could.

"I take it everyone has said their goodbyes, so we'd best get," Azula said.

Ursa hugged Zuko, and then Azula. "Don't be too hard on the boy; I couldn't resist the urge to tease him a little bit," she whispered.

"Too late; I already promised to punish him."

Lu Ten chuckled, and his grin widened when he was Ursa's expression. "I believe she won the game of who can make whom most uncomfortable."

"I suppose I deserved it but that doesn't mean I want the image in my head."

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Azula, Sokka, Tsubasa, and Amadahy were riding Marshmallow while the others rode Fluffy, the logic being that that way the split was close to even while if Marshmallow did anything violent or unpredictable the airbender would be there to keep them from plummeting to certain death. The other half of the logic was to keep all the couples together, and Azula and Sokka might as well be the ones to be here, as it kept both of them away from their siblings, making various forms of intimacy much less awkward.

"You alright, Sokka?" Azula asked.

Sokka sighed. "Yeah, it's just…must we go to the North Pole, again? There's got to be other spiritual founts in this world."

"Piandao has a contact that knows where the Northern Water Tribe's most holy of holies is and can get us into it."

"Yeah, _that_ doesn't sound like an international incident waiting to happen," Sokka said sarcastically.

"That's one thing you don't have to worry about, we're travelling with the Avatar; we've got the ultimate form of diplomatic immunity," Azula said. "As long as we don't kill anyone or use Marshmallow here to demolish half the city, we should be golden."

Meanwhile on Fluffy, Katara sat with Piandao. "So, what does this 'Order of the White Lotus' do, exactly?" she asked.

"We protect the world from various threats," Piandao said vaguely.

"So not just the Phoenix, then? I can't really think of anything that could top that," Katara contemplated.

"Indeed, you would have a hard time trying to. But a rogue Avatar would be pretty bad, as well."

"Rogue Avatar? Could that happen?"

"The Avatar began as a beast in a man's form, and was that until it learned compassion. The Avatar becomes more human with each generation, but not everything about humanity is good. I fear the day that the Avatar learns to be xenophobic, for example."

Katara shuddered at the idea of an Avatar with bigotries. "There's a pretty thought. Would you guys ever face down a threat that was more, you know, human?"

Piandao contemplated for a while, then shrugged. "I suppose all things are possible in the fullness of time, but I doubt it. Whatever nation had earned our wrath would have to have proven itself to be a threat to pretty much everyone who lives on the surface of this planet, and maybe the celestial balance itself for good measure."

"Yeah, it doesn't seem likely," Katara said.

It wasn't until later that night, as Katara was trying to sleep that she realized that Piandao had not actually said that there _wasn't_ anything worse than the Phoenix out there.

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"In five minutes we start saddling the bison, so you're done," Azula shouted at Ty Lee, Mai, and Piandao, who halted their three-way sparring match.

"You girls are good," Piandao panted.

"You're no slouch yourself, old man," Mai said.

"Yeah, but I've had a couple decades more of training," Piandao said.

"We went to the Fire Academy for Girls," Ty Lee countered.

"Ah; I've heard that place is brutal. Still not the same, though."

Sokka approached. "Hey, according to your story, you took on students, right?"

"Occasionally," Piandao admitted.

"Well, the thing is, I'm the weakest fighter in the group, and for some reason that never bothered me while I was the only guy and maybe I should worry about what that says about me but moving on, the point is, it does bother me now and if we get into a fight I want to be able to, you know, hold my weight more."

Piandao considered him for a full minute. "Okay. I'll start training you the next time we land to stretch our legs. After you've bought a training sword, of course."

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Amadahy shuddered. "Hu-hu-hu. It's cold."

Tsubasa wrapped her arms around her, extending her air shield so that it covered Amadahy as well, making her as immune to the elements as any airbender. "You know, you could have grabbed a blanket."

"Yes, but then you wouldn't be cuddling with me right now, now would you?"

"My aren't you devious," Tsubasa observed with a wicked grin. She looked at the wall of the cave where they were hiding with the wind bison; "Not much of a view."

"Think of it as cozy." Amadahy snuggled up into her. "You know—like this."

Just then, Piandao returned with an old man. "This is Master Paku. He's one of the greatest martial waterbenders and teachers here in the north."

Paku noticed the Avatar and the airbender. "I recommend you do not do that when we leave this cave. That sort of thing s frowned on here at the North."

"Just one of your many sins as a culture," Sokka muttered darkly.

"What?" Paku demanded.

"Sokka here has…history with the Northern Water Tribe," Azula said. "Let's just go."

"I see. You look like you're from the Southern Water Tribe, boy, so tell me, has our _Southern_ brethren's attitude on homosexuality changed while I wasn't looking?" Sokka clenched his jaw and glared daggers at the old man. "Didn't think so." He addressed the group tersely: "This way."

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Amadahy stood in a swamp in the spirit world, looked into her reflection, and there was Avatar Aang. He rose from the water, forming a body. "Hello, Amy. What brings you here?"

"Avatar Aang, we need help," Amadahy said.

"I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to be a bit more specific than that," Avatar Aang said.

"You seem to know what's going on with the whole Phoenix thing—"

"The whole what, now?"

Amadahy blinked. "Are you s—"_—erious?_ "Zhou. The Zhou thing. Where's Zhou?"

Aang shrugged his wizened shoulders. "I would not know. I only knew he was lying about the ghosts because they were a rather unnatural sort of ghosts."

"Well, we think he might have learned how to do that at the Library of Wan Shi Tong, which would make an excellent hiding place, being, well, lost. Could you help me with that?"

"No."

"Well, thanks for noth—"

"I can point you to someone who can. Seek out Koh the Face Stealer. You must be careful to show no emotion while you speak to him, however, or he will steal your face." Avatar Aang began to dissolve.

"Wait—how do I find Koh?"

Avatar Aang reformed. "You're kidding, right?"

"You say that like it should be obvious—this is the _spirit world!_"

"It _should_ be obvious; this _is_ the spirit world. Every child knows that navigation here doesn't work like in the real world—all you have to do to find anything is think about it and walk in any random direct, and if it exists here and isn't actively trying to avoid you, you'll find it."

"Oh. My tribe is kind of backwards," Amadahy admitted.

Avatar Aang patted her on the shoulder. "That is no sin. It's what you do that matters." And with that he dissolved back into the water. Amadahy walked, thinking the phrase _Koh the Face Stealer_ over and over again until she found a cave.

She entered, knocking on the stone wall. "Hello? Mr. Face Stealer?"

"Ah, how polite." Amahahy managed to not jump out of her skin, and turned to face the speaker, and saw a great insectile body. "Politeness is so rare these days, don't you think? Come, enter my abode and tell me what I can do for you, young Avatar." Koh climbed onto the ceiling and scurried over her head, his many legs making an unnerving _clink_ing sound as he moved.

Amadahy gulped, took a second, and then followed him into the darkness. And in the darkness, she could still see; huh, something else she didn't know about the spirit world. "I need help."

"Indeed you do. Most who come seeking my aide are pretty desperate indeed. Ironic, though, that you'd come seeking my aide when your previous incarnation hunts me."

"Why would I—wait, did you say 'hunts', as in, present tense? How does that work, exactly, when _I'm_ the Avatar?"

"You are the Avatar, but you're also Amadahy."

"I didn't tell you my name."

Koh smirked knowingly, then continued. "You're a distinct and unique individual, but at the same time, you're not."

"You're contradicting yourself."

"Do I contradict myself? Very well, I contradict myself. You're large; you contain multitudes," the mask blinked and was replaced with a man's face, who was smirking again. "Think of the Avatars as islands in an archipelago. If you're sailing on the surface of the sea, the islands appear to be distinct, no one shaped like another, each with unique contours, shapes, and sizes. If you swim underneath the surface, however, you see that all the islands are in fact the tops of undersea mountains, and they're all part of the same mountain chain, the same formation. Therefore, it is no contradiction to say you are distinct and unique, while at the same time you're not. These statements refer to different levels of your being."

"Okay, I guess that makes sense," Amadahy said. "So why am 'I' hunting you?"

The face blinked again, and was a woman. "Something about stealing the face of the woman you love."

"Was that wise?"

The face blinked, and was a baboon. "Why don't you explain to me why you don't think it was," Koh said indulgently.

"I don't know how we stack against the denizens of the spirit world, but the Avatar is the most powerful being in the physical world, at least potentially, and we're the avatar of the World Spirit. I can't imagine we'd be an enemy you'd pick lightly."

Koh chuckled, and switched faces again. "And indeed I didn't…lightly. In fact, kidnapping a bride on her wedding day is just not my style—I prefer my victims to come to me." He didn't seem to be able to sit still, and was scurrying about his cave, face-blinking a lot. "I meant to teach you a lesson—that you were becoming too human. We'd known each other for so many millennia, and here you were, changing into a creature I did not recognize. You even think of yourself _as_ human now, even though you were here long before they were."

"I was? How is that possible?"

"Do you want to discuss ancient history, or do you want to discuss your current problem?"

"Right, then. I need to know where Zhou is."

"I know not."

"The library of Wan Shi Tong, then."

"Ah, yes, that I can help you with. In fact, you've been near it before. In the desert. It is buried under the sand, but a single parapet still sticks out. You even know someone who can lead you to its exact location."

"I do? That's awfully convenient," Amadahy observed.

"Where the Avatar walks, fate ripples like the wake of a boat."

"I see."

"You can't blame the humans for not telling you _that_ part, at least; they can only see what is and what was, not what it took to get from there to here. Such small creatures, are they not?"

Amadahy did not deign to answer. "Hey, why are you helping me, anyway?"

"Why wouldn't I?" Koh asked.

"Well, right off the top of my head, the whole me hunting you thing."

"Yes, that, but what's an old grudge when civilization is at stake?"

"So you care about human civilization, then?"

"Oh, I _love_ human civilization," Koh said emphatically. "So much life, so many souls thirsty for knowledge—so many faces to steal."


	24. Ch 18: Places We've Been

**AN:** Two separate milestones are reached simultaneously with the addition of this chapter; my _total_ word-count reaches 400k, and this story has reached 70k words! Woot-woot! Of course, it took a little longer than I thought it would a couple chapters ago…

Also, I don't usually do this, but I'd like to thank xzeb1 and Josh Spicer for their reviews. I make jokes about needing reviews because my ego won't stroke itself and all, but the truth is that this actually _is_ hard work, in spite of all my flippant assurances about making it up as I go along, and it _certainly_ eats a good deal of my free time. But seeing intelligent, thoughtful reviews acknowledging the effort and praising the work, well, that makes it all worthwhile. This isn't a dig at anyone or anything, it's just that I just got back and, well, it's nice to be appreciated.

The World without the War

S-Michael

Chapter 18:

In Which We Return to Places We've Been

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Master Paku had not been paying any sort of attention to the Southern boy or his sister, and now he found himself wishing that he had. He'd been leading the way to the oasis, and after they'd scaled the ice wall down, the Avatar went into her trance and the others pretty much stood around waiting. Truthfully, he didn't much want anything to do with the boy, and by extension his sister; he didn't have much use for someone who had so clearly forsaken his cultural traditions in favor of secular Fire Nation nonsense.

After a couple of hours, the Avatar snapped out of it, and Piandao's party had ascended the way they'd descended, and it wasn't until the girl began to climb that he caught the insignia on her betrothal necklace out of the corner of his eye. He gasped, and was literally frozen for a second. She was climbing by the time he snapped out of it, and he wanted to call to her, but here he was, unable to remember her name.

Paku reached futilely at her rapidly retreating backside, his mind working furiously but just about as futilely. Damn it, what was it? Ka-something. He considered just shouting "Hey, you!"

No. Not for something that was surely just a figment of his imagination. _Was it?_ Of course it was; what were the odds that she'd be wearing _his_ betrothal necklace, the one he gave to the one woman he'd ever loved? Impossible, damn near. Surely, his mind was just playing tricks on him in his old age. Yes, that must be it. So Paku turned and left, and he almost believed it.

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They landed at the Northern Air Temple, all except Tsubasa who detoured to Saibei City ("You know, if one of us _has_ to be banished from a place we're going, it's a good thing it's the person who can fly under her own power," Sokka said), and immediately visited Mai's parents. The visit wasn't because any of them who actually knew them particularly liked Mai's parents or out of an excess of filial piety on Mai's part, but for news.

Zuko and Azula exited the chamber where spy reports were kept (the others had respected Fire Nation national security enough not to enter). "Toph won her bid for Ba Sing Se," Azula said. "Several states are in rebellion against her, as well as about ninety percent of the surviving Dai Li—well, a hundred percent now that the loyalists have hung up their Dai Li uniforms to be cops or spies instead—but she has control of the Central State, and several advisors, including King Bumi."

"Good for her, really, but why do we care enough to stop here?" Katara asked.

"Because Ba Sing Se is on our way to the desert, and I thought it might be a good idea to pick up an earthbending tutor for Amy," Azula said.

"I'll doubt she'll master earthbending before we reach Wan Shi Tong's library," Katara countered.

"I don't imagine she will, either, but she's still the Avatar, you know, and needs to be learning this stuff," Azula said.

"She better have kept her promise, is all I'll say." The tone of Amadahy's voice and the smile on her face removed whatever bite the words might have had.

Azula didn't know what promise Amadahy was talking about, but she could extrapolate from what she read. "The Foggy Swamp is now a sovereign state 'on equal footing with any other, under the governance of the Foggy Swamp Tribe and the protection of Ba Sing Se and Earth Queen Toph.'"

Katara frowned. "Sounds like you've been absorbed into the Earth Kingdom."

"Don't worry, it's what we wanted."

"It _is?_" Sokka demanded.

"Yeah and why not? You've seen how much control Ba Sing Se _actually_ has over its vassal states, and we're completely surrounded by the Earth Kingdom on all sides. Surrounded by vassal states that pretty much hate us by this point, to boot. We need some sort of way to deal with them short of war, and for that we need to be a part of the league," Amadahy explained.

The Water Tribe siblings looked at each other, and Azula grinned; she could picture Tsubasa smirking, saying _See? I told you they were smarter than you!_

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"I thought you said Mount Royal Palace City was the largest in the world," Amadahy accused.

"I said it was the _greatest_, not the _largest_," Azula corrected. "Ba Sing Se's the largest, by far, and it's welcome to the title. It would starve without the earthbending tracks to deliver food to the various depots, the air quality's not precisely good, and the construction and contents of the sewer system are literally a state secret, but chances are it takes a fair deal of earthbending to maintain."

"Oh, Azula's just blindly patriotic," Tsubasa said dismissively. "Come on, Amy, I'll show you the wonders of Ba Sing Se." Amadahy wrapped her arms around her girlfriend, and they took off.

"Do know how to make an exit, don't they?" Sokka mentioned.

"It's pretty easy when you have the power of flight," Azula said.

"Couldn't you jet?"

"Collateral damage."

"Ah. So, wanna see the wonders of Ba Sing Se yourself?"

"Not so fast," Piandao said. "Sokka, it's time for you to have a proper sword. Normally, I'd have you forge one yourself, but that would take days, so we're going to have to go shopping."

Sokka looked at Azula. "Go; you can be attached to my hip later," she said.

He kissed her cheek and was off.

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"You know, I am simultaneously annoyed and relieved by the fact you won't be staying long enough for supper," Earth Queen Toph said from her throne. She spun ninety degrees, putting her knees on one armrest and her neck on the other, kicking her feet. "On the one hand, it's a waste of _such_ a good propaganda opportunity, but on the other, it would have been such a formal occasion. Spirits, I hate those; so freaking _tedious_, yet necessary."

"You need an air of regality if you're going to rule," Azula agreed.

"Gah, don't remind me!" Toph shook her head. "So, what can I do for you? Did you ever find the Avatar?"

"Hello, Toph; it's me," Amadahy said.

"For serious, Amy? Heh, no shit! Never figured it'd be someone I know." Toph grinned. "Anyway, about what I can do for you…?"

"Amy needs an earthbending tutor, and as we happened to be passing through and happened to know that the two most powerful earthbenders in the world both happened to be here, well…" Azula said.

"I'm afraid I'm too busy being the Earth Queen, and I require my advisors on hand, including Bumi. Truthfully, what I know about ruling an empire could fit on the head of a pin, so I play to my strengths as a living lie detector and natural leader to pick the best team I can."

"I see," Amadahy said.

"There _is_ somebody I can spare, though, and you'd actually be doing me a favor by taking him, as a matter of fact," Toph continued.

"Why do I not like the sound of this?" Azula said suspiciously.

"Oh, he's not incompetent or lazy or a criminal or anything like that—far from it!" Toph whispered something to a guard, who left. "Thing is, he's a prisoner, and I'm facing a conundrum with what to do with him. I can't release him, for political reasons, and I'm not willing to execute him just for the sake of form." She sighed. "I really wish I could confince myself that he's an evil bastard, but he's not. He was just a stooge of Long Feng, you know?"

The guard returned, escorting a young man. "Princess Azula, Avatar Amy, I'd like to introduce you to my precesessor in this post, former Earth King Kuei. Kuei, the Avatar and the princess, and all the rest."

"Charmed," Kuei said, bowing to Amadahy.

"L-likewise," Amadahy muttered, pale.

"You alright?" Tsubasa whispered.

"Yeah." She'd been told before about how the Avatar ranked in human affairs, but those were just words, and had been treated differentially by Firelord Iroh, but the Fire Nation was so far away, barely more than a rumor in the Foggy Swamp; it might as well have been the land of elves and fairies. But this was—or had been—the _Earth King_ who was bowing to her, the direct or indirect ruler of seventy five percent of the world's population, including everyone she'd ever known who wasn't actually part of the Boggy Swamp Tribe or was with her right now. It made her head spin.

"Status as Earth King aside, Kuei isn't the greatest of earthbenders, but he _is_ an earthbender. He knows the basic forms, and can teach them to Amy. He's a hell of a lot better than nothing, at any rate. So what do you say? Provided you want to go, of course, Kuei?"

"You have me in a truly spectacular cell, my queen, but I would much prefer to be out of it all the same," Kuei said.

Amadahy managed: "Yeah, sure, I'd love to…" _be tutored by the most powerful monarch on the face of the planet._ Logically, she knew he wasn't, that even what he was in power he was a puppet and king in name only to much of the empire besides, but logic had nothing to do with it.

"Great, it's settled then!" Toph said cheerfully. Then solemnly: "Former Earth King Kuei, I hereby banish you from the Earth Kingdom now and forever, except insofar as your duties to the Avatar demand you be here. I place you under your own parole; do I have it?"

"You have my parole, Earth Queen," Kuei said.

"Very well, then; I take you at your word," the Earth Queen finished. "Hey, Amy? If it's not too much trouble, take the long way when you leave the Earth Kingdom; Kuei tells me he's always wanted to see the Kingdom."

"There is one more thing," Azula said. "About the 'living lie detector' thing."

"Oh?" the Earth Queen allowed.

"I am a four hundred foot tall purple platypus-bear with pink horns and silver wings."

"Yeah, yuk it up; I'd like to see you try that trick in a situation where it actually mattered."

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"C'mon, Bosco, it's easy," Ty Lee said, walking on her hands. "Like this." The bear yawned at her.

"Ugh, like we didn't have enough flea-ridden animals already," Tsubasa complained yet again. Marshmallow licked her. "I hate you."

"You're cute when you're irritable," Amadahy said, kissing her (non-licked) cheek.

"Done already?" Tsubasa asked.

"I've already taught her everything I know," Kuei said. "I could be having her train some more, but against who? She's already better than me. Really makes me feel inadequeate when my student outstrips me in less than a week." He grinned self-deprecatingly as he said it. "Seriously, though, I know I'm not exactly an expert and that she's the Avatar and all, but _damn!_"

"Oh, I know that look!" Sokka said to Azula. "You have a theory. Go on, spill."

"Of course she has a theory, she's an evil genius who has a theory about everything," Tsubasa said.

"Well, alright," Azula admitted. "The Avatar has been around for a long time, and each new Avatar learns the elements over again. Each Avatar has to, of course, but on some level the Avatar Spirit is learning the same thing over and over again. After a while, I would imagine that the Avatars would grow…complacent. Only thing is, Amadahy was taught the Foggy Swamp waterbending style, and as I've never even _heard_ of the Foggy Swamp tribe before a couple months ago, and Amy hadn't of heard of the Avatar I can't imagine very many Avatars have been there. Katara, you're a waterbender of a more usual sort—is Amy's style really as weird as it looks to me?"

"Completely counterintuitive, from my point of view," Katara said. "She does most of her moves stiff-backed. _Water_bending—_stiff-backed._ I mean, come on."

"So, essentially, while leaning her primary art, Amy couldn't have used memory or instinct or whathaveyou to be brilliant but lazy, she had to actually _work_ at it," Azula said. "She's more skilled in the art of becoming skilled than any previous Avatar, then."

"Cool," Amadahy said.

"Wait—I tried to teach her airbending, and it didn't take," Tsubasa said.

"Tsu, I love you, but you couldn't teach a rock to fall," Amadahy said, patting her girlfriend's face affectionately.

"I suppose I could try teaching you some firebending," Azula said.

"Are you sure that's wise?" Sokka asked. "Just because she's better at earthbending than Kuei doesn't mean she's mastered earthbending."

"Why does she have to learn the elements in order? Because it's the natural way of the universe? Screw _that!_" Tsubasa is the one who said this, of course.

"I'm willing to give it a try," Amadahy said.

"Alright, the first thing you need to do is master your breathing."

"Figures," but Amadahy obeyed.

"Widen your stance," Azula said. Then: "Wider."

"Are you _sure_ you're not teaching me earthbending?"

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"Hel_lo!_" Zhou said at the parchment. The whole point of keeping Ilmarinen at the Library was so that he _wouldn't_ have to be constantly checking on him, so Zhou's being here at all defeated the purpose, and yet he couldn't bring himself to just lie back, have a drink from one of those ice cups, and work on his tan. Well, as long as he was here, he might as well see if there was anything else potentially useful here, which is how he came across this particular document.

It was…strange, more than anything, and yet it made a certain amount of sense. He checked the library directory he had on him, and descended a couple floors, traveled through a maze-like laberynth, and found a room with three statues. These beings were frozen in time by the lion-turtles with a freaky combination of energybending and early element-bending, and what they were were even freakier besides, even though they were technically human. He looked at the names and descriptions at the base of the statues. It was nice to know that, if anything went wrong, he had some aces in the hole. Well, two aces; the third he wasn't going to raise under any circumstances—even (nigh-) eternal life and world domination weren't worth releasing such a creature on the world.

He decided to move Ilmarinen here, at any rate; he'd be less conspicuous in the presence of other statues, even if the worst did not come to pass.

That done, he returned to his parchment, studying how to release the statues from their slumber. Later, he stood, cracked his spine, checked on Ilmarinen one last time, and left. His bad luck, really, that he left when he did, because shortly after a messenger hawk arrived from the village to warn him that certain people he'd described had arrived.

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"Ooh, let's get a drink in one of those cute little ice cups," Ty Lee suggested.

"We're looking for someone," Azula chastised.

"Aw, relax," Sokka said. "It's entirely possible our mystery friend is getting a drink himself. Besides, it's not as if we're going to just randomly bump into Zhou." Sokka wasn't looking where he was going, tripped, and fell into a cloaked man. "Whoa, sorry. That usually doesn't hap…pen…" He saw the look on the Fire Nation siblings' faces, and then the one on the muttonchopped man's. "Oh, that's just fucking _typical!_"

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**AN:** Well, writing this chapter was typical, which is to say I got the first seven pages down in two days, spent four days fretting over the last two dozen words or so, and the rest of however long it takes me to get this published writing the next chapter or two and making sure everything is consistent. Also, I ended up deleting about a hundred words or so describing the changes Toph has made to Ba Sing Se; it didn't really seem logical for the characters to be discussing it. I guess I'm going to have to find some excuse to return there later, or maybe in the sequel. (Oops; spoilers.) (Actually, I'm thinking of just absorbing it into this fic; it won't end up being nearly as long (I hope).)

You know, I've noticed that I suffer from three distinct kinds of writer's block; there's the kind that most people think of, where I honestly can't figure out where I'm going with this (I'm _pretty_ sure at least _one_ of the blocks I've suffered in this story was at least _partially_ caused by that), the kind where I know exactly where I want to go but getting there is awkward (either because there's some intermediary step or because I temporarily lost my so-called mastery of the English language), or else I simply can't force myself to sit at the computer and write it (curse you, ADD! And having ideas for other stories!).


	25. ANFSCD

The World without the War

S-Michael

And Now For Something Completely Different

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It appears that the Fourth Wall in Chibi Land hasn't been repaired yet, so there will be no Chibi Parody. However, because heaven forbid I should just keep the story going for more than four chapters in a row, I give you what it might be like if the characters from _The World without the War_ met their canon counterparts. Also, this works better as a script, but that's not allowed on ffn because the admins are fascists, so I simply made it as close to being a script as proper novel-type English grammar will allow. Suck it, admins.

**Sokkla-w meets Sokka-c and Azula-c.**

Says Sokka-c: "Could you guys cut it out for a moment? Watching myself make out with Azula is, just, _wrong_ on so many levels."

Says Sokka-w: "No." He makes out with Azula-w some more.

Says Azula-c: "You checked me out of the mental hospital for _this?_ That does it; I officially don't want to live anymore."

**Mai-c meets Zuko-w.**

Says Zuko-w: "Wow, you're almost exactly the same as my Mai. Heh-heh: my Mai."

Mai-c stares at him. "Could you stop smiling like that? It weirds me out."

**Ty Lee-c meets Ty Lee-w.**

Says Ty Lee-c: "Stop copying me!"

Says Ty Lee-w: "_You're_ copying _me!_"

"_You're_ copying _me!_"

"_You're_ copying _me!_"

"Stop copying me!"

"Stop copying me!"

"Stop copying me!"

**Aang meets Amadahy.**

Aang stares at Amadahy; Amadahy stares at Aang.

Says Aang: "I don't want to know."

Says Amadahy: "Ditto."

**Sukka-c meets Sokkla-w.** And just for the record, Sukka needs a better name; I mean, _look at it!_ It looks like it ought to be pronounced "suck-ah."

Says Suki: "Should I be concerned that you brought Azula here to see your counterparts who are dating before you brought me?"

Sokka-c's hand is behind his head. "Ah, heh-heh…"

Azula-w and Sokka-w grin at each other.

Says Azula-w: "Shall we put on as good a show as last time?"

Says Sokka-w: "You know it, O love of my life." Azula-w sits in his lap; they rub noses, conspiring to be as sickeningly cute as possible. "I wuv wu."

Says Azula-w: "Why wuv wu, too." They kiss.

Says Suki: "I am _so_ out of here!"

Sokka-c looks like he's going to be sick. "I think I just figured it out. It's not that _she_ is _good_ in this universe—_you're evil!_"

**Toph-c meets Toph-w.**

The universe explodes. (This is not based on a Chuck Norris joke, but it probably is one.)

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_Man._ (S-Michael collapses back into his chair.) I have been holding that in since the first freaking arc. Poor Ty Lee; she goes through so much trouble in order to be unique and special and somehow contrive to give off a strong lesbian vibe in spite of being canonically attracted to guys, just to learn that there is someone out there exactly like her. (S-Michael stares at his computer screen, completely at a loss for what to say next (sadly, this sort of thing is, like, 60% of my writing process). For, like, six minutes.) Well, I can't think of anything to say that isn't ridden with spoilers, so…bye.


	26. Ch 19: Zhou has a Bad Day

**AN:** Of course I forgot to load this chapter onto my flash drive before going to the library, so now I'm standing out in the cold to load it. Well, okay, I'm not out in the cold _yet_ (as of the writing of this Author's Note), but it's freaking _cold_ out there! You expect me to freeze my fingers off (which I nearly did _with gloves on_ while walking between my place and the library—have I mentioned that they're only a block from each other?) typing this while standing in a snow bank? It's. Cold. Out. (This week has been awful. Goddamn climate change.)

Anywho, it's time for a fight scene. Someone once said that I was good at this, but that's only because I take ridiculously painstaking care with them.

The World without the War

S-Michael

Chapter 19:

In Which Zhou has a Bad Day

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"Oh, that's just fucking _typical!_" Sokka quickly rolled to his feet and leaped out of the way of one of Zhou's fire blasts, which destroyed a building. Azula and Zuko shot fire at Zhou, Tsubasa blasted him with wind, and Katara and Amadahy quickly divided the ice fountain between them and sent tentacles of water after him.

Zhou blasted off straight up into the air, and Tsubasa unfurled her glider, quickly outpaced him, and forced him to ground with a kick to the chest. Dust flew where he hit. "You can't escape that easily!"

The dust cleared, and Zhou was standing, wreathed in flame. "Who was running? I just needed a moment to raise my shield. Speaking of which, how do you like it? There is _so much_ useful information in the Library of Wan Shi Tong."

"Let's test it," Amadahy said. She moved, and Zhou's feet were encased in earth, pinning him to the spot. "Everyone hit him now."

Zhou struggled against his restraints, and was hit air, water, and blue and red fire, all of which exploded brightly against his flame-shield. He blasted the ground, and though he didn't fly a hundred feet in the air like before, he managed to free himself. "That was _low!_" he sneered, blasting Amadahy. She blocked with a shield of earth; the earth was eaten through by the flame, but behind it was a shield of water. The water held, barely, mostly because of her constant attempts to freeze it, but still the Avatar was pushed back two dozen feet.

Zhou's next attack moved like a living thing, a serpent that he was holding by the tail and was thrashing about wildly in an attempt to escape, and any local who hadn't already been running was doing so now.

"Stay back; your 'bending isn't strong enough to fight him," Sokka said to the former Earth King.

"But you're not a 'bender _at all_," Kuei protested.

"Yeah, and?" Sokka grabbed his sword. The non-benders circled behind Zhou. "Piandao, left arm. Mai, throw as many daggers into his torso as you can."

As they were doing this, however, the 'benders were fighting the fire-snake.

"You know, Amadahy, we could use your Avatar powers," Katara said, wielding a water whip.

"I'm working on something." Suddenly she stood bold upright, and a pillar of ice shot out of the ground, knocking Zhou on his back. He rolled back onto his feet, and was knocked to the ground again by another pillar of ice coming from behind.

Azula shot him with lightning. Zhou held up the amber bauble from "Kai's Pendant" in his left hand (while still holding the "tail" of the "snake" in his right) which absorbed the lightning, and then shot it back at her. Azula redirected the lightning, and the bauble re-absorbed it, but didn't shoot it back.

The non-benders struck; Mai put a good dozen daggers in Zhou's back, Piandao brought a blow down on his left forearm, and Sokka did the same for his right. The weapons themselves didn't make it through, but their kinetic energy did, and Zhou "dropped" the "tail," causing the fire snake to disappear.

Zhou spun around to face the non-benders, but his fire didn't stop spinning when he did. "Oh, really?" The fire around him grew as it spun, becoming a giant fireball which kept growing and growing. Amadahy and Katara attacked, but their water evaporated on contact with the fire. "You will all burn. You—"

Suddenly, the fire was gone, and Zhou was on his knees. His hands were to his throat, and it looked like he was suffocating, though he made no sound. "Yeah, I'd like to see you try to firebend without air! Or live, for that matter," Tsubassa shouted, clenching her fist.

"Tsubasa," Azula said.

"You can't hear me, but if you could, I'd tell you not to beg for mercy, for I have none."

"_Tsubasa._ Remember what happened after Glacier Plateau," Azula reminded.

Tsubasa realized what she was doing, and stopped. "Oh fuck." She stopped clenching her fist, air rushed back into Zhou's space, and Zhou was extremely ticked.

"You," Zhou growled, blasting Tsubasa.

"Tsubasa!" Amadahy shouted.

Tsubasa started to block, but it was going to be too late. She knew it was going to be too late. She'd spent the critical fraction of a second in shock at the fact that she'd just tried to eat Zhou's soul, that part of her _wanted_ to.

Suddenly, there was a great blast of air, and the fire was blown to the side, missing Tsubasa. Tsubasa looked at where it came from, and Amadahy was standing there, eyes glowing blue.

"**Everyone, get back,**" the Avatar said with the Voice of the Legion. "**I do not want to hurt anyone…but Zhou.**" She (it?) blasted Zhou with earth and fire simultaneously. Zhou returned fire, but the Avatar blocked with a swirling wind-shield. "**Glider.**"

"Uh, right," Tsubasa tossed her glider to the Avatar.

The Avatar swung it like a bat, and a huge wave of air hit Zhou, knocking him into the air. He jetted back towards her; she took off. The Avatar held on with one hand as she simultaneously punched and kicked; fire came out of the end of her fist and, dozens of feet below her, earth flew up into Zhou's path. Zhou tumbled to earth, but then blasted off again, and simultaneously blasted the Avatar. She was hit with the fireball, and appeared to burst into flames. Zhou grinned, and got to close…

Suddenly, the Avatar reached out and grabbed him around the throat. She had her own fire shield up, and where they touched their shields neutralized each other. "**Take us to the Phoenix, and I **_**may**_** let you live.**"

Looking into her eyes, Zhou finally realized _what_ he was fighting. Sure, due to the bauble he had the power of a hundred fully-realized Avatars, but he wouldn't be able to make it back up later, and what he was fighting was the Avatar _State_…which had the power of every Avatar to have ever lived. For the first time in this fight, he was actually scared.

Zhou brought up his legs and kicked her below her ribs with both heels; the Avatar let go involuntarily, and Zhou blasted away. The Avatar gave chase.

"We need to follow them," Sokka said.

"How?" Tsubasa asked. "She has my glider, and by the time we make it to the beasts, they'll be long gone."

"I saw sand-yachts near the gate; we could 'borrow' one or two."

They ran towards the gate and saw the sand-yachts, with only a single guard. "Oh, Spirits, not _you guys_ again."

"Huh, fancy meeting you here," Azula said to the sandbender they had forced to drive their yachts during the prison break. "We're taking this yacht. Follow the Avatar and the flying firebender, or Mai will stab you."

"Y-yes, ma'am," he said. They climbed aboard and chased the flying figures.

Zhou shot the Avatar a couple of times; she didn't bother to dodge with her fire-shield up, and he gave it up, putting all of his strength into fleeing. The Avatar began to slow; she might have been objectively stronger, but she was using her own strength, while he was using the bauble's.

Zhou landed in a tower in the desert. "Is that what I think it is?" Sokka asked.

"It could be, but why would Zhou lead us to Wan Shi Tong's Library?" Azula wondered.

Meanwhile, the Avatar landed and took a moment to survey her surroundings and catch her breath. She dropped the fire-shield, as she didn't want to burn this building down and it took a lot of energy besides. "**Come out, Zhou. You cannot hide from me.**"

Zhou was not within earshot, however. He was descending deep into the bowels of the library to find the room with the statues. He couldn't release the statues the proper way—he wasn't an energybender—but he could do it the brute force way, though it would take a considerable amount of his ill-gotten strength. He blasted them with firebending, overloading the bending that held them frozen in time, and they eventually collapsed in a heap at his feet. He was worried for a moment that he'd accidentially killed them, but the two unfrozen statues stood. "_You are the one who released us from our slumber?_" the male asked in an ancient dead language. He was short and stocky, but well-muscled.

"_Yes,_" Zhou said.

They kneeled and bowed before him. "_Then we are your Dragons,_" the female said. For a second he thought she meant she was literally a dragon, but then remembered that in ancient times to be someone's Dragon was to be their champion. They stood again; she was tall and willowy. "_I am Faina, and my colleague is Prokhor._" She looked around. "_I see you haven't released Kirill._"

"_I am not yet desperate enough for that,_" Zhou said. _And never will be_.

Faina frowned. "_This may be wise._"

"_I am being chased by the Avatar. She's in the Avatar State._"

Faina and Prokhor looked at each other. "_So she can die, then._"

"_We have our own score to settle with her…him…it,_" Prokhor said.

"_Now would be as good a time as any to settle your score; the world hasn't seen the likes of you in twenty thousand years, so she won't be on guard,"_ Zhou said. He lifted Ilmarinen with a fire whip. "_I've got to get this out of here, however, so if you could make a hole in that wall…"_

Faina held up her hand. There was a blast of light, and an oval section of wall was simply _gone_. Zhou tossed her a compass. "_This will lead you to a rock at the center of this desert. It will take a few days to walk there, less if you commandeer some sort of vehicle._" They blinked. Right, he forgot he was dealing with some of the first people to have ever stepped foot in this world. "_Well, I reckon you'll get there well enough on foot; you Paleolithic types were hardy_." Zhou left.

Meanwhile, the others were climbing the side of the building, leaving Kuei and the driver behind. They climbed into the window. "Look, ash! We can follow them," Zuko said.

"Ash? But what was burning? Their clothes and hair and stuff were perfectly intact," Sokka said.

"Well, something was apparently burning, because there's ash. Just be glad there's a trail to follow."

Meanwhile, the Avatar had run into Wan Shi Tong. "**You don't understand. I have to—uh.**" She swooned; no one was meant to be in the Avatar State for so long. "**I have to find Zhou. He has the Phoenix captive.**"

"_You—who let you escape, Prokhor?_" Wan Shi Tong demanded in the ancient language. The Avatar and the spirit looked, and the little man walked into view.

"_Wan Shi Tong and the Avatar—so I've got you both in one place,_" Prokhor said. He held his arms out to his sides, then brought them together with great force, unleashing a sonic blast. The Avatar fell to her knees, and even the spirit seemed unstable. Then he took a deep breath, and unleashed another one: "**RAAHHHH!**"

Ty Lee dropped in behind him and jabbed him in every major pressure point she could, and most of the minor ones. "What the hell was he _doing?_" Sokka asked, having trouble remaining on his feet even though they'd only been on the periphery of the blasts that were directed at the Avatar.

"I'd like to know myself," Amadahy said, managing to get to hands and knees.

"The flow of his chi is strange," Ty Lee said. "Like a 'bender's, only instead of going to one of the element chakras, it flows to the sound chakra."

"And you can tell that just by looking, huh?" Piandao asked.

"What is he?" Amadahy demanded of the giant owl.

"Something that was never supposed to exist," Wan Shi Tong said.

There was a blinding light. Knowing that there was a threat but not knowing what it was, the party sought cover. Amadahy gave up on getting to her feet and flipped over onto her back. She brought the back of her heel down into the floor, causing a rough ball of earth to launch into the air, then blindly kicked it towards what she perceived to be the source of the light. Faina blasted the rock ball, and ran out to grab Prokhor by the shirt collar and drag him. Amadahy kept kicking balls of floor at her, though, which she had to blast, and she only had two hands; she let the blinding light dissipate. Faina dragged Prokhor, and Amadahy dug her fingers into the floor and pulled herself after them, continuing her assault all along. But the others could see, now, and chased them. Faina blasted the ceiling, causing the floor above to collapse in front of her.

"Well, fuck," Sokka said. To Ty Lee: "Let me guess: her chi flows to her light chakra."

"Hey, yeah—can you see auras, too?"

"No, it was just a lucky guess," Sokka said.

"Hey, owl-guy," Tsubasa said. "What _were_ those people? And we need to hear something more specific than 'something that was never supposed to exist.' If Ty Lee is to be believed, they were some sort of light-bender and sound-bender, so what were they?"

"A lightbender and a soundbender," Wan Shi Tong said flatly.

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Zhou had used a back way up to the tower and tossed Ilmarinen out the window, then used the ropes the party had used to climb up to rappel down. "This yacht is mine, now. Off."

Kuei and the driver got off, and Zhou rocketed. Kuei saw the driver turn around, and as he did, it was like a mask fell off; his very body language was different. The driver stuck a hand in the sand, which solidified around the yacht. "I'm sorry, human, but you're not going anywhere with the Phoenix." Even his voice was different.

"Big mistake!" Zhou shot him with a fireball, which he palmed aside.

The driver examined his palm, saw that the white of his bones were showing, and made an annoyed sound. "Look what you made me do. I rather like this body, I'll have you know, and you made me damage it. I have other avatars, even in this era when people are afraid to deal with me, but still."

A look of horrified realization crossed Zhou's face. "…Koh?"

"Oh, so you found me out, did you? And here I thought I was being vague. Well, time to die." He moved, and huge spikes came out of the ground on either side of the sand-yacht to impale Zhao.

"This is just not my day," Zhou said, grabbing Ilmarinen and blasting off, destroying the yacht in the process.

"I-I don't suppose you can chase him?" Kuei said.

"I don't have a glider," Koh said.

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"How can there be soundbenders and lightbenders? Sound and light aren't elements!" Sokka protested.

"What's your definition of element?" Wan Shi Tong asked.

"You know—earth, fire, water, air."

"That's a list, not a definition. What quality do these things have that others lack?"

"Well, uh, substance, for one."

"So are metal and wood elements?"

Azula interrupted: "Why don't you tell us what you mean when you say they should not exist? Clearly they exist if we just fought them."

"I can explain all of this later. Right now we need to get to the containment room before they awaken the mindbender," Wan Shi Tong said. "Get on." They climbed on the giant owl's flank.

"'Mindbender' doesn't sound that dangerous," Ty Lee said.

"Neither did 'soundbender' or 'lightbender,' and look what happened," Mai whispered back.

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"_Are you feeling alright?_" Faina asked.

"_Better, but…_" Prokhor clapped his hands, meaning to make a nearby wall fixture crack, but it was just a clap. "_MY 'BENDING IS GONE!_"

"_What?_" What sort of horrible creature _was_ that pink girl, that she could just take away someone's 'bending like that? What sort of age had they awakened to? "_We're going to need to raise Kirill._"

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**AN:** You know, none of this would have happened before the hiatus. I planned on this being the last arch, finding some excuse to make it so they don't find Zhou until just in the nick of time to have their final battle before Ilmarinen explodes. During the hiatus, I came across this talk wondering why four chakras bend four elements when the other chakras just randomly do nothing. (Sure, light, sound, and mind aren't elements, but why are earth, fire, air and water? Because a bunch of Neolithic people said so? That's not a good reason for anything.) Someone said that those disciplines sounded peaceful, and someone else said that they sounded like sonic weapons, lasers, and mind rape, and that the people of the Avatar world probably had good freaking reason to want to forget they ever existed—especially the mindbenders.

I immediately thought, "You know, I could use this to pad out_ The World Without the War_, if and when I ever get back to writing it," but now that I'm actually writing it…well, let's just say that they're not padding anymore. Could it be that Zhou's Dragons have an agenda he might not approve of?

Also, I so was not going to raise Kirill when I started writing this chapter, but I feel I kind of backed myself into a literary corner here. I mean, one, I spent two chapters establishing the fact that mindbenders are freaking _scary_, and two, _I gave him a freaking name!_ I mean, come on, I didn't even give the driver a name (though I was thinking of calling him "Joe" on account of his being Koh)! What'd I go making that kind of commitment for if I wasn't going to do something with it?

By the way, are there any _Tegan and Sara_ fans out there? Because I seem to have become addicted. I wrote the last two chapters (and about four _Lip Service_ fics) listening to three of their CDs looped.


	27. Ch 20: It Gets Worse

**AN:** As if the last chapter didn't introduce enough crazy new ideas as it was…

I _think_ "wyrd" is pronounced "weird," but it could be pronounced "word." It's a real mythological concept (Celtic, I thing), but my take on it may be influenced by the quantum wave hypothesis.

The World without the War

S-Michael

Chapter 20:

In Which It Gets Worse

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"A long time ago, the veil between the worlds was very thin," Wan Shi Tong said as he flew through the halls at breakneck speed, the humans clinging to his back.

"You mean between the physical world and the spirit world?" Amadahy asked.

"That too, but no," Wan Shi Tong said. "The physical world and the spirit world are strands spun together forming a single string in our wyrd. The wyrd is a web of choice and chance, or perhaps a web of worlds, if you prefer. Every time you flip a coin, there's one wyrd-path where it came up heads and one where it came up tails, and every time you make a decision, you are in effect chosing which wyrd-path to travel down."

"So there's a world out there where our great-grandfather went to war with the Earth Kingdom?" Zuko asked.

"Most likely," Wan Shi Tong said.

"Ugh; I wonder how many months it took everyone involved to get sick and tired of that foolishness," Zuko said pityingly.

"_Anyway,_ it was possible, with great effort, for the denizens of one thread to travel to another. And so the lion-turtles came to this world and made it their own. They invited the spirits, and brought whatever animals amused them from any of the thousands of threads they surveyed. They made for themselves a paradise where they lived. They were energybenders, but they gave it up in favor of element bending in later millennia. The first Avatar was a lion-turtle."

"I find that hard to believe," Sokka said.

"I did not ask for your opinion. The era of the lion-turtles came to an end, however. There are a handful left, individuals who have grown to the size of small islands and spend the centuries contemplating their navels, but their civilization is dust. The strain of constantly fighting off the Elemental Beasts proved to be too much. They figured that so long as the Avatar continued to exist in this world, something of the lion-turtles would exist—even though the Avatar Spirit itself was an avatar of the World Spirit and not of the lion-turtles per se, the first eight hundred and change Avatars were lion-turtles, even though they were…somewhat deficient. So long as there were mortal sentients on this world, in fact, something of the lion-turtles would live.

"So they reached into the wyrd one last time—the veil was no longer thin, but there are always ways—and found a species that had the fire, air, water, and earth chakras and that they felt could outrun the Beasts in the long term and could cause the Avatar to evolve in the direction they wanted it to, and brought them to this world. That species was humans, obviously. So the elders used their energybending to open the chakras so that humans might become 'benders, and hence Avatars. But humans have seven chakras."

"So?" Amadahy asked.

"_So,_ if the mind, light, and sound chakras were allowed to actualize into 'bending styles, the Avatar cycle would short-circuit and the Avatar would cease to exist," Wan Shi Tong said, "which would defeat the purpose of bringing humans here in the first place. But they did, and worse yet no one knew where they would insert themselves into the Avatar cycle, so the Avatar could not be allowed to die until they were all wiped out. Luckily, if lion-turtles aren't killed by outside forces they can live for however long they feel like."

"So, what, they murdered anyone who practiced a certain bending style in cold blood?" Azula asked. "Just, that's real fucking nice."

"Mostly, they used energybending to rob these people of their power, but many 'benders considered that a fate worse than death, as they would to this day."

Tsubasa realized something. "So, wait, does that mean the Avatar personally led the effort to 'sterilize' these people? I wonder if they hold a grudge."

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"_Are you sure about this?_" Prokhor asked.

"_They took your bending!_"

"_Whatever they did didn't feel like energybending—maybe my 'bending will return?_"

"_They're with the _Avatar;_ we can't risk our lives on their mercy._" Faina said. The room darkened as she sucked up all the light in the room like a sponge, and then she put all her chi into overloading Kirill's containment. In utter desperation, she continued until she passed out, her chi gone.

The light returned to the room, and Prokhor saw her collapsed at the feet of the statue. For a horrible moment, he thought that all this had been for nothing, that Kirill would not awaken for them, but then the statue trembled. It cracked, light shining through, and then there was a flash of light, and Kirill stumbled forward, but righted himself. "_Shining Faina. Prokhor, leader of my choir._" "Choir" was what one called a band of soundbender guerillas.

"_We've awakened in a strange new era, Master. My soundbending has been stolen from me, perhaps temporarily, by some technique other than energybending, and Faina depleted her power to free you,_" Prokhor said.

"_We should not engage them until we learn more,_" Kirill said. "_Do you know a way out of here?_"

"_The man who freed us left a trail._"

"_Alright, then. Pick up Faina and lets go._"

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"I hope this doesn't get infected," Koh mused about his injured hand. "I might have to get it amputated, and that would suck."

"Perhaps you should stop playing with it," Kuei said. Was he actually talking with Koh the Face Stealer? In a human body?

"Perhaps," Koh agreed.

The three unnatural benders descended from the tower. Kirill caused their nerves to freeze uo. They landed on the ground, and Kirill grabbed Kuei by the face, pressing foreheads.

Kuei screamed; it was like someone was taking a red-hot poker to his mind and using it as a stirring spoon. Kirill let go. "I have learned your language. You will tell us—" He dodged a sudden upwelling of earth.

"_Oh, damn_," said Koh. "_You couldn't have been a little less observant, could you? To think I let you get inside the deposed monarch's head for no reason._"

"_How can you resist my 'bending? And speak my language?_" Kirill demanded.

"_Amusing as your pathetic excuse for a 'bending art is, your very existence taints the chi of the world around you, so I might as well nip this whole thing in the bud._" Koh earthbent another blast at him. "_I can't believe that Wan Shi Tong actually kept you around, Kirill. All that noise about 'specimens for study' and 'the betterment of humankind' and whatnot._"

Kirril used another move that allowed him to take control of Kuei. "Attack him!" he ordered.

Kuei kicked up an earth ball and punched it at Koh, who caught it one-handed and threw it back, knocking the former Earth King out cold. "_Please, you honestly think I care whether that guy lives or dies?_"

Prokhor put Faina down and clapped. Koh slacked his jaw and plugged his ears, but it was just a clap. Prokhor cursed. Koh laughed. "_You ran afoul of Ty Lee, I see. Well, I guess that so long that there is literally nothing any of you can do to stand against me, I might as well end this game._" The sand below their feet turned to glass, for a radius of about a hundred yards, and the edges rose to form a bowl.

Kirill made a mad dash for Kuei's passed out form, grabbed him around the nape of his neck, and took control of his body. He forced Kuei to stand, and opened chi paths that had previously been closed. Kuei (or rather Kirill) could now access earthbending powers he'd never dreamed of having before…at the expense of his life energy. They created an earthbending wave of sand, collected Prokhor and Faina, and sped out of there.

Koh gave chase, but they were losing him. _I should have tossed that rock back at him hard enough to kill him._ He was equally dead this way, as Kirill was going to use him up until he completely ran out of steam; the only question was whether Kirill lost Koh before that. Koh wished that this form had been an airbender, or had a glider with him, or even that Zhou hadn't of destroyed the sand yacht; any of those things could have shifted things in Koh's favor, but as it was he was disadvantaged. A human 'bender in kamikaze mode was as strong as a fully realized Avatar, and a spirit in the physical world cloaked in human flesh…was not. Even a Greater Spirit such as Koh was limited here.

They lost him; Koh returned to the Library.

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The gang arrived too late. The statue room was empty, and then they went to the tower, and found the sand yacht destroyed and Kuei and the driver missing. The driver returned on a wave of sand.

"Since when can you do that?" Sokka demanded.

"Where's Kuei?" Azula demanded.

"Best-case scenario, he's dead; worst-case scenario, he's being mind raped by Kirill," Koh said.

Amadahy recognized the voice: "Koh?"

Koh bowed. "By the way, can somebody see to this?" he held up his burned hand.

"How can you be Koh?" Sokka demanded.

"When Koh steals someone's face, their faceless soul wanders the spirit world aimlessly, and their body becomes one of his puppets," Wan Shi Tong said.

"Hey, now, _I_ don't go revealing _your_ secrets to everyone," Koh said indignantly.

"I can't believe that we didn't leave a team up here in ambush. I mean, it's the only way out of the Library," Azula muttered to herself.

"Hey, now, we were in a hurry and didn't think, and besides, when a giant owl-monster tells you to do something, it's kind of hard to say no," Sokka said.

"If it makes you feel any better, more people up here would have just been more people Kirill could use as pawns," Koh said. "Seriously, though, my hand. I'll be less useful to you if I have only one."

"Right," Katara said, and got on with healing him.

"I don't suppose you have any idea where they're going?" Sokka asked.

Azula shook her head. "Even if they have some sort of plan, they're strangers in a strange land. Until they get their bearings, predicting their movements would be impossible. Zhou's a more immediate threat—that's it! Zhou!" She began searching the wreckage of the sand yacht. "Zhou's going to want to get back in contact with his new minions, so he must have left instructions for them. They don't know anything about the world we live in, though, so he couldn't have given them too complex of instructions. What could be simpler, then, than following the needle of a compass that doesn't point north?"

"Great!" Sokka said. "I don't suppose the giant owl will be willing to give us a ride?"

"No," Wan Shi Tong said.

Ty Lee pulled out a bison whistle and blew it. "Fluffy and Marshmallow are coming," she said.

"I must make sure they have not destroyed much of my Library," Wan Shi Tong said, and flew back into the tower.

"I just want to point out that the great, noble Wan Shi Tong has indirectly caused a threat to the Avatar _and_ a threat to civilization itself, and that the evil, duplicitous Koh the Face Stealer is the one trying to fix the problems," Koh said.

"So, what, you care what we think about you, now?" Amadahy asked.

"No. I just want to rub your faces in it."

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Faina had awakened, and Prokhor had found that his soundbending had, indeed come back. Faina wasn't all that strong yet, but she bent the light around Kirill, rendering him invisible. The cost of that was that he was blind, but he could still use his minbending to sense the locations of Faina, Prokhor, and now Zhou.

"_You got here quickly,_" Zhou said. They would have gotten there even quicker, had the earthbender not died on them.

_I'm closing in on him,_ Kirill sent to Faina, who adjusted her shroud of invisibility accordingly.

"_Yeah, we, uh—_" Prokhor began.

Kirill reached out and grabbed Zhou's face; Zhou screamed, as Kirill's mental tentacles invaded his psyche, ruthlessly going through everything. Faina dropped the shroud, and Kirill could see his victim from without as well as within, but the view from within was far more interesting.

He learned Zhou's name, his character, and his knowledge. Such a tiny little man with such huge dreams, but also such a reservoir of knowledge. Kirill learned the history of human civilization, the history of the Phoenix, the nature of the world they were in, and the nature of the enemies they faced, insofar as he knew them. Then, instead of taking things from Zhou's mind, he put things in there.

"You have only two goals in life—to protect me and to destroy the Avatar. You are my Dragon. Understand?"

"Yes, Master," Zhou said.

_That was relatively easy; he must not be all that disciplined._ "You will wait here for the Avatar, and when she arrives, you will destroy her or die trying. Now, then, I'm going to unlock your true potential so that you may fight her at…let's call it 'full strength.'"

That was an interesting bauble at his throat, too bad it would only work for a firebender. Kirill took his purse. Another interesting concept, this "currency." The lion-turtles had something like it, if he recalled. He addressed Prokhor and Faina. "Now, then, we have two goals. We need to destroy the Avatar, and we need to find and destroy the Nest." He'd given them the modern language on the walk here, and spoke it because he thought it best if they master it before they reached human civilization. "The Nest has top priority, and I think I know where it is, now, thanks to Zhou here. The spirits of moon and sea live near the North Pole. To keep the flow of chi over this world even, the lion-turtles would have placed the Nest at its antipode."

The other two looked at him blankly, having no idea what he was talking about. "Just trust me, I ripped the knowledge from Zhou's mind and assembled the pieces logically." His minions nodded.

Kirill looked at the statue Zhou had with him, and then looked into it with his mind's eye. There was a mind in there, human but impossibly old and disciplined, forcing himself to not go crazy in that airless darkness out of sheer force of will and hypnotic suggestion. For some reason it surprised him that the human mind was alone, but then, what did he expect? For Ilmarinen to be constantly battling with his inner-Phoenix for dominance? The Fire Beast had been absorbed into Ilmarinen a second before it would have been born, according to Zhou's knowledge, so why wouldn't its nascent mind have been absorbed by Ilmarinen's mature one? Its instincts crawled along in the back of Ilmarinen's mind, the desires to fly and burn things, and an attraction to firebending similar to a squirell-badger's attraction to shiny things, but they were instincts and nothing more; certainly not compulsions.

"Take this with us; it will ensure that the Avatar continues to follow us." _Also, I really wouldn't mind living for a thousand years._

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Koh had Amadahy practicing a few more earthbending forms while they rode Marshmallow. "Lightbenders and soundbenders can create visual and audio illusions, respectively, as well as more direct weaponized forms of their talents, which you've already seen to some extent. Against soundbending particularly there's little defense other than to slack your jaw and plug your ears. A mindbender can force your body to stop moving from a distance and can accurately predict your moves, but otherwise his skills are in getting other people to do his fighting for him. Kirill can rip any knowledge he needs from nearby minds, can make them into his slaves, and can induce them into the kamikaze state."

"I heard about that state," Azula said. "Theoretically, if a 'bender were disciplined enough and honestly values completing their goal more than they value their own lives, they could unlock their chi and become as strong as a fully realized Avatar, but only for a short time, and then they die."

"Yeah, well, Kirill can induce it in his slaves," Koh said.

"Spirits. No wonder no one wants these people up and about," Sokka said.

"What about you? What can you do?" Azula asked.

"I can bend all the elements—this body is an earthbender (of sorts), so I can do that at master-level, whereas I'm weak in the other elements. Other bodies have other talents," Koh said. "I'm also immune to Kirill's powers, so that'll come in handy."

Marshmallow dodged left and Fluffy dodged right, each of them avoiding a giant fireball.

"What is it?"

"Zhou."

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**AN:** _Dun-dun-DUN!_ What is the Nest? What would its destruction mean for the world? I'm not telling just yet, but I will say that it is astonishingly appropriate that Zhou, Mister Let's-Kill-the-Moon himself, has been the main villain thus far. I mean, seriously, if I hadn't of been letting it slip about how I'm making it all up as I go along, you'd think there was no way it was a coincidence.

Early on, I'd planned for there to be three story archs. The third one was the most plotted out—Zhou was going to get that bauble of his charged so that he could attempt a coup and make himself Firelord, _obviously_—the first one was going to be set at the North, and the second one…would come to me, eventually. Then I got to thinking about the fact that in the canon, Ozai had declared himself the _Phoenix King_, so did that mean that the Phoenix exists in the Avatar universe? (Of course, it could be that it's just a legend, like in our world, but I quickly discarded that option as being "lame.") If so, where was it? I wondered. So naturally I assumed that someone had eaten it.

No, seriously, though, I read this book once called _Dragon and Phoenix_ where someone had imprisoned the Phoenix for a thousand years so it could fuel their empire, and I simply took that concept and applied it more literally. But the Phoenix could not be alone; I mean, Phoenix, Sozin's Comet—why does the fire element get all the nice things? No, the Phoenix had to be part of a matched set. And as I always do when I need inspiration for plot devices and/or horrible things to do to my creations, I turned to the Bible. Okay, actually, I turned to Wikipedia, which told me that the Bible had just the beasts I was looking for; Ziz, the air beast, Behemoth, the land beast, and Leviathan, the water beast/fish who ate Jonas. Seriously, they're all in the Old Testament somewhere (that book is _freaky_). So where were they if _they_ existed in the Avatar universe? Sleeping because without the Phoenix their existence would cause a disturbance in the force—quite logical, really, as was the conclusion that their awakening would mean the end of civilization.

Somewhere in there, I got the idea that I would have eight and exactly eight OCs. There would be four males and four females, two people who were above the level of normal 'benders (Amadahy and Ilmarinen), four heroes (Amadahy, Ilmarinen, Kasha, Usani) and four villains (Doro Kim, Wakaun, Kazane, Tsubasa). Of course, I couldn't bear to lose Tsubasa at the end of the second arc, so she got to become a good guy again, which destroyed the balance of my OCs. That was at the beginning of the second arc that I came to that conclusion, so I was able to write it around her change of heart, and then, as I previously stated, I came to the conclusion that everything was better with lesbians.

Seriously. Titanic? Better with lesbians. Jurassic Park? Better if everyone was a lesbian. James Bond? Would be better as Jane Bond. (Actually, I believe someone has written that book, but it lampoons the original books rather than the modern movies, so I haven't read it yet.) Firefly? I actually had an idea for a Firefly/L Word crossover once. Every college movie ever? Goes without saying, provided they're actually watchable in the first place. Well, _almost_ everything would be better with lesbians, but if a story well and truly sucks, all adding lesbians will do is turn it into porn, so Uwe Boll need not heed this advice…may he burn in hell. (I will never forgive him for _BloodRayne_—sure, the game wasn't all that original, but it was good, clean sociopathic fun, and he went and did _that_ to it?)

What was I talking about again?

Well at any rate, the point is that it has mutated again. The miscbenders (as in "miscellaneous") were going to be filler, but took on a life of their own. Kirill became an actual character instead of a boogeyman figure, half of their origin story actually came to me _as I was typing it_, and they soon overshadowed Zhou. And so instead of a sub-arch or a clean arc-break, the Zhou arc kind of flows into the Kirill arc.


	28. Ch 21: Another Fucking Fight Scene

**AN:** Ugh. Another fucking fight scene. I spent two weeks on the first seven hundred words alone. Seriously; I could not for the life of me think of a reason for Ty Lee to not just jump in there and ninja Zhou's pressure points (the bauble and Kirill's mindbending make him powerful, but not _skilled_). (I spent much of the next week addicted to strip slays (it's like writing a fan comic, only you don't have to draw), and long story short I ended up writing basically the whole thing on Sunday, barely making my schedule (yes, I have a schedule again, though it might not be apparent).) Man, I can't wait to get back to the world building and Sokkla (or as I like to call it, Sokkazula).

PS: On the off chance that anyone doesn't remember from the show and hasn't realized yet that his name's an option in the freaking Character A/Character B slots, Piandao isn't an OC. He's the swordsman from _Sokka's Master_ (season 3). Maybe I should have gotten that bit of information to you sooner, but hey, I'm sure you all knew it already, right?

Oh, and if it seems that this chapter actually seems better than my usual quality, that's because _I actually proofread it, for once!_ Well, sort of; I kind of glossed over it clearing things up here and there.

The World without the War

S-Michael

Chapter 21:

In Which There is Another Fucking Fight Scene, and It Gets Worse _Again_

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The desert was a forbidding place, but Kirill was a mindbender; he sensed the minds of the animals around him, and they led him to water, laid down their lives so he and his Dragons may eat, or both. Meanwhile, he sensed that the Dragons were disturbed. "What is it?" he demanded.

"Are you sure Zhou will distract them?" Prokhor asked.

"Zhou will likely kill a few of them—all, if we're lucky," Kirill said.

"Sorry, it's just…"

"…The pink girl," Faina finished.

Kirill could taste the fear in the back of their minds, and sighed. "Her name is Ty Lee, and she is just a girl. She is not Tulu in human form, nor an avatar of the Crawling Chaos, nor any other sort of ancient mythological horror. She's a teenage girl, and not even a 'bender. She uses a strange form of martial arts, yes, but then, so do we. It doesn't make her any less mortal than anyone else. Do. Not. Fear. Her."

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"It looks like he's alone down there," Amadahy said.

"Which means Kirill has supercharged him and left him as a gift for us; nice," Tsubasa said sardonically.

"Excuse me, I'm going to distract him so you guys can land without dying," Koh said, jumping over Marshmallow's side and into the earth like it was water. He rose from the sand completely covered in stone and advanced towards Zhou's position with loud clanking gravelly noise. Zhou brought up his shield. The golem made a left hook, and a right hook; Zhou blocked, and blocked again, and then shot a fireball at its head. The golem fell backwards, then rolled back onto its feet and came at him again.

"I'm pretty sure that Zhou's shield is stronger against bending than it is against melee attacks," Sokka said. "I need to get over to Fluffy so I can confer with Mai and Piandao."

"Right, then." Tsubasa picked him up and carried him over there.

"Amy, firebenders aren't fireproof, and even if we were, our _clothes_ aren't," Azula said. "There has to be a 'layer' of free space underneath Zhou's shield. I want you and Katara to concentrate on piercing it, because if you do…"

"Squish," Amadahy supplied.

"Exactly."

Meanwhile, Sokka was speaking with the non-benders on Fluffy. "Alright, from what we saw last time, melee weapons work better on Zhou's shield than 'bending."

"Makes sense," Piandao said. "It's not as if the fire itself is capable of blocking anything—it's the chi inside of it."

"Sure, I guess. Anyway, melee weapons don't work all that good on it, so I think we should be trying to stab him, not slice him."

"Maybe if I jab fast enough, I can get my hands back out of the fire before they get burned too badly," Ty Lee suggested.

"Er, I think that should be a tactic of last resort," Sokka said. "Just look for an opening. Or something."

The air bison landed, and the humans got off. Zhou and Koh were duking it out, shielded with fire and rock, respectively.

"I have an idea!" Ty Lee stole a pair of daggers from Mai and bounded off. She jumped over a fireball, and then over Zhou himself, spinning, and began to stab him; the daggers penetrated just far enough, leaving wounds that were barely more than paper cuts, but hitting all the pressure points, causing Zhou to scream and collapse.

Sokka said: "Well, that was anticli—" Zhou screamed again, this time in rage and fury. Fire spread across his body, but whether it was shielding him or consuming him was impossible to tell for it burned bright and thick. The fire grew into a giant ball, causing the party to fall back and regroup as it grew legs and arms and stood.

"You just _had_ to open your mouth, didn't you?" Azula asked dryly.

"Say, I don't suppose retreating is an option, is it?" Sokka asked.

"Kirill has Ilmarinen. And is a threat to the balance of the world practically by dint of his very existence." And Zhou was their only link to him.

"Yeah, I didn't think so. Which begs the question of how do we fight a giant fire monster." He turned to Piandao. "Any ideas?"

Piandao stared up at the lumbering form, inhaled, and said: "Yeah, I've got nothing."

"You know, Tsubasa, it would probably be okay to use your voidbending if you're careful not to kill him," Azula said.

"You're not the one who has to live with the consequences," Tsubasa said, but tried to create a void in the heart of the fire monster, anyway. "The chi flow is too powerful."

Sigh. "Fuck," Azula said.

"Do we have a plan?" Sokka asked.

"Yeah. We're going to wear Zhou down until he runs out of chi," Azula said.

"Yeah, I was afraid that that was the plan," Sokka said. "Well, at least it seems to be taking its sweet time getting over here." Suddenly, a whip of flame shot out of the spherical body and began lashing at them; the benders used various shields, while the non-benders dodged back.

"People who can't defend themselves against the living embodiment of flame should probably back up," Katara said.

The benders and Koh split up to surround the Zhou-monster at a reasonable distance; it was far from a perfect strategy, but at least this way they could be relatively sure they wouldn't be hitting each other. Amadahy kicked the ground, causing a tidal wave-like upwelling which she began to punch, causing rock projectiles to shoot from the other side at the Zhou-monster. Koh's avatar crouched low and performed a spinning low kick with his heel in the ground, causing the very earth to ripple in the Zhou-monster's direction, making the very ground beneath his/its feet (pods?) shudder and conical projectiles shoot up to stab the fireball at random. Katara spammed her flank of the Zhou-monster with spears of ice, which evaporated on contact but she kept reforming from the vapor so she could keep on spamming. Tsubasa wielded her glider like a bastard sword, using it to fling enough razor wind at the creature to level a Ba Sing Se Middle Ring city block. Azula punched and kicked the air, sending jets and streamers of blue flame at the thing that was Zhou while Zuko prepared to shoot lightning at it.

"Zuko! Zhou's trinket can absorb lightning, remember?" Azula controlled her breathing well enough that she could speak and continue her assault at the same time.

"And not fire?" Zuko asked.

"Presumably it can't absorb and produce the same thing at the same time," Azula said.

"So if I shoot him, and then you shoot him…"

"Of course!" Using the trinket couldn't be free; at the very least, it took a conscious effort on Zhou's part, and the more spread out his attention was, the more likely he was to trip up somehow, or at least less likely to actually hit them with his own attacks. Azula prepared her own lightning. Zuko fired and then immediately began spamming the fireball with his fire, then Azula did the same. A few seconds after absorbing Azula's lightning, the fireball shot lightning at Zuko, who redirected it back at it, then continued his spamming. It tried the same with Azula with no more luck, and then again, but shot a wave of fire at her while she was in the middle of redirecting the lightning. The fire hit a wall of void.

"Hey, fire idiots, would you think defensively? We're going to need all of us alive if we're going to win here," Tsubasa shouted.

Meanwhile, the non-benders held back. "Just, nice going, Ty Lee," Mai said.

"Hey, how could he possibly do that?" Ty Lee retorted. "It's not possible."

"I've always heard chi referred to with water metaphors," Sokka said. "Maybe his chi was flowing so much that when you blocked it, it built up and burst."

"I think you're taking the metaphor too far," Ty Lee said. "Besides, that can_not_ be healthy."

"He's under Kirill's sway; I don't think he cares."

"Damn it, I _really_ want to do something," Mai said.

Sokka sighed. "Yes, I know, but as we can't even approach that thing without it melting our flesh from our bones, I don't see what we can do other than tend the…air…bi—" Sokka stopped talking. Then: "That's it! Those giant mattress monsters fly using airbending, right? If you get on Marshmallow and Ty Lee gets on Fluffy, you can get them to attack." _Maybe. How smart are air bison, anyway?_

"Right, then," Ty Lee said, and scrambled up Fluffy's flank. Mai more slowly made her way up to Marshmallow's saddle, but both wind bison got off the ground. They circled above the fire monster like vultures, only turning their tails inside and slapping the air with them, using it to pummel the thing that was Zhou from above.

"That only leaves us," Piandao said. "Any idea as to how we can be useful?"

"Not really; I guess we'll just have to keep our eyes open and try and think of something. Maybe serve as runners to coordinate their attacks," Sokka said.

Meanwhile, Katara continued to spam the thing that was Zhou. She estimated that she was penetrating an average of a foot or so into the fire, but was very much not in her element. Desert all around, even the very air was devoid of any water she didn't bring with her. Amadahy was earthbending so that Katara could use all the water, maximizing their effectiveness, but even so every droplet was precious, every whiff of water vapor, and she dutifully pulled it all out of the air, using her very sweat as part of her weapon and, if necessary, her blood. But the effort was telling. There had to be a better way, somehow. Or else she would not make it. Katara gathered all the water, and created a great lance of ice, anchored in the earth beneath her feet. She pushed it into the great fireball, eventually getting in two feet, but it was hard going.

"That's it!" Amadahy said. "Katara, you can't do it alone. Soak the ground under my feet!" Katara gathered the water again and did so. "Alright, Katara, Koh, back my move!" She created a new lance, this time of ice mixed with sand and with an earth covering besides using both earth- and waterbending, and Katara and Koh lent their strengths, their various 'bending talents buttressing each other in a variety of complex ways.

"Tsubasa! We're putting all our strength into a joint attack!" Koh shouted. "Be our shield."

"Damn it, what did I _just_ say to the fire siblings?"

"I honestly have no idea; I've yet to actually listen when you talk," Koh said.

Tsubasa made a rude gesture at Koh, but also made a thirty-foot leap and was standing on the base of the lance in front of Amadahy so as to be in a better position to defend them all.

"Do you think that'll work?" Piandao asked, stroking his goatee.

"If anything will, but they can't do it on their own. If Zhou doesn't take enough punishment elsewhere, he'll concentrate all his chi there and force them out." Sokka saw the top of the fire beast's spherical body flare as it was hit by a blow of air from one of the flying bison, and snapped his fingers. "That's it! Piandao, try and flag down Mai and Ty Lee. I'm going to warn Azula and Zuko."

"Warn them of what?" but Sokka was off, so Piandao waved his arms in the air at the sky bison.

Sokka ran up to Azula. "Sokka, get back!" she said, not pausing in her attacks.

"Everyone else is concentrating their fire on the Zhou thing's far side, and I need you and Zuko to get out from 'behind' him."

"This is the most logical place for us, then," Azula pointed out. "Spread out his concentration as much as possible."

"Just trust me, this won't be a good place to be in a few minutes," Sokka said.

"Why?" She threw up a wall of fire to block the Zhou thing's fire whip.

"I'm no expert on firebending, but I would assume it works better going downwind than upwind, right?"

"Slightly."

"Yeah, well, in a few minutes you're going to be downwind of the fire monster in hurricane-class winds," Sokka said.

"Alright. Zuko! Go around about ninety degrees or so."

"Why?"

"Because the man with the plan says so."

"Okay."

Sokka ran back to where Piandao was, and the air bison were landing. "What is it?" Mai demanded.

"We're going to create a sandstorm," Sokka said.

"What? Why?"

"One, it's harder for Zhou to block physical objects than chi, remember? The sand may be projected by wind augmented by airbending, but is not itself touched by chi, so ought to count. Two, what do you do to put out a campfire when you don't have a firebender or Tsubasa around?"

"You throw earth on it," Ty Lee realized. "You're a genius, Sokka!"

"Compliment me if it works," Sokka said. "Alright, here's what we do…" After Sokka explained his plan, the air bison positioned themselves behind Amadahy, Fluffy near the ground and Marshmallow about a hundred feet above him.

"Alright, Fluffy, this is a little like that trick we practiced where you fly upside down," Ty Lee said. "Just try not to inhale any sand." She patted him once and jumped off, tucking and rolling against the ground while Fluffy positioned himself vertically with his tail towards the sky and head down towards the ground. With a great breath, he blew a hole into the ground, and made swimming motions with his paws, directing the pillar of air and sand up to Marshmallow, who fanned it using the beaver-like tail and airbending, creating a great gushing storm directed directly at the Zhou thing, but at a steep enough angle and acute enough cone that the 'benders were not affected.

"What the hell is that?" Tsubasa demanded.

Katara was concentrating too much to speak, but grinned a little; leave it to Sokka to come up with something as off-the-wall crazy as it was ingenious. She concentrated on keeping the ice in the lance ice and forcing it forward, a few inches at a time. She could feel her bending power mixing with Amadahy's and, to a lesser extent, Koh's. _Just concentrate on the next inch, the next little bit. Do not think, just concentrate._

Ty Lee led Fluffy to the loosest sand, gesturing to indicate her movements to Sokka and Piandao who then told Mai how to adjust Marshmallow. "Do you think we can move Marshmallow down a little?" Piandao asked, hanging over one side. "I think it might help the others more."

"Yeah, but that way we'd risk interfering with Tsubasa's interference," Sokka said, hanging over the other. He paused, then decided that that sentence was fine the way it was. "We need to stay high."

Amadahy pushed with all her might, forcing the giant dirty upside-down icicle deep into the pit of fire without melting. Suddenly, she "felt" something—the lance was piercing flesh! They were in! Immediately, she melted the water at the very core of the icicle and forced it up into the hypothesized layer of space under Zhou's fire and flooded it—Zhou's shield was actually helping at this point, preventing the water from escaping—and then she froze it, froze _him_, and the fire beast collapsed with Zhou paralyzed. She brought him down to earth, and the others gathered.

"What the hell?" Katara asked.

"Did he get burned by his flame, after all?" Tsubasa asked.

"No, or his clothes wouldn't be still intact," Azula said, and yet Zhao was a blackened, wizened thing, as thoroughly used up as an orange peel.

"He thoroughly abused his chi and his body, and this is the result," Ty Lee said, and for once her eternal smile was gone. She was biting her lip and her fists (_fists_, mind) were trembling; she was, in a word, pissed. "He was a bad man, but he didn't deserve _this_—to be used, drained, and tossed aside like an old hanky all in one fell swoop. Kirill has a lot to answer for."

"Wha…?" Zhou managed to choke out. Amadahy moved his arm so he could see it, and the revelation seemed to shock Zhou out of it. "Great Agni." Then: "_Great Agni!_ The mindbender is lose! The others must have freed him. He had me…did I break free?"

"Not exactly," Koh said. "You've lost so much chi that his mind control has nothing to fuel itself with anymore. Of course, that also means you're going to be dead soon."

"…Fuck," Zhou said.

"Yeah, that's something of an understatement," Tsubasa said.

"Zhou, focus," Azula said. "We need to know where Kirill is going."

"He's looking for something. Thinks it's at the antipode of the Koi. Calls it the Nest." Zhou expended the last of his energy saying this, and breathed his last.

"What's the Nest? And what's the Koi?" Azula asked.

"The Koi are where you went to contact me," Koh said. "As for the Nest, it's a very old story. There are spirits who believe that the lion-turtles weren't as willing to accept extinction as the historical record would indicate. They say that they used techniques similar to the ones used on Kirill and friends to preserve a bunch of eggs so that their species may repopulate the world one day, after the Avatar has grown strong enough to defeat the Beasts of the Elements and 'human' enough to be a force for 'good.'"

"Alright, let's say that's true. What's Kirill want with it?"

"To destroy it, most likely."

"Yeah, I was afraid of that," Azula said. "What happens if that happens?"

"Best case scenario? A truly unique and wonderful species is lost from this world forever," Koh said. "Worst case scenario? It turns out that this world really _does_ depend on the existence of the lion-turtles to exist and their extinction causes a violent disruption in the chi that implodes the planet, and I die; also, so does all life on Earth including all of you."

There was stunned silence for a moment after that. "Well," Tsubasa said finally. "That blows."


End file.
